Traffic congestion and ways to reduce it - Compare paragraph - What's better?

Hello everybody!
This is a topic in my IELTS class: Traffic congestion is becoming a huge problem for many major cities. Suggest some measures that could be taken to reduce traffic in big cities.

And I have 2 styles of the body for this topic. I dont know what is better choice? Please give me your advice and correct my errors

Thank for helping me

The first one

In order to minimize the state of traffic congestion occurring throughout inner cities, one of the solutions is to adjust the transportation system. In fact, if the streets are wide and here's no road barriers on constructions staying as obstacles on streets, vehicle flows will be much factor and citizens will feel more comfortable. Furthermore, once public transport system in done logically conveniently and used effectively for inhabitant's demand of travelling, people will definitely choose public transports in stead of their own ones. By that way, the amount of vehicle on streets will reduce significantly.

Another resolution that is worth mentioning is to improve citizens' way of thinking and travelling. For instance, when the number of people understand and accept taking public transport as their main means of transport, traffic jam will not happen constantly on the roads. Nevertheless, the local authorities also need to take action to reduce the amount of transport products imported into the cities by imposing high taxes for each means of transport. Therefore, with high prices of vehicle, inhabitants might not been travelling by their own cars or motorcycles.

The second

There are a number of steps need to be taken to solve this problem. First of all, the governments should improve the quality of public transport system, which lessen impact on crowded street in rush hour by decreasing private vehicles. If people feel comfortable with public transport, they will left their own car at home.

On the other hand, the governments also have to raise the citizen's awareness to combat chaotic in rush hour. When people do not obey the traffic law, there is no doubt that everything is from bad to worse and traffic jam simultaneously happen. In contrast, although streets are full of vehicles, they could move slowly if the traffic rules are followed.

Note: In my city, there are a lot of road constructions to repair drainage system

In order to minimize the state of traffic congestion occurring throughout .. "state of" does not fit here very well, but it is not bad.

In that way, the amount of vehicles on streets will be reduced significantly.

Therefore, with high taxes on v ehicles, inhabitants might not be travelin g by their own cars or motorcycles.

...should improve the quality of the public transport system, which lessens impact on crowded street in rush hour by decreasing the number of private vehicles. If people feel comfortable with public transport, they will leave their own cars at home.

On the other hand, the governments also have to raise the citizens' awareness to combat chaotic activity during rush hour. When people do not obey the traffic law, there is no doubt that everything will change fr om bad to worse and traffic jam simultaneously happen. In contrast, although streets are full of vehicles, they could move slowly continuously if the traffic rules were followed.

These two go together nicely. You can put them together as one thorough response.

If I had to choose one that is more impressive, I would choose the first one.

:-)

Both of the versions are short; may be you should join them in one essay.

thanks for helping me.
If I join them together, the essay will too long and over 300 words (this is only 2 paragraphs :))


In my country, people often struggle for small position and dont drive at their line so that everything became a mess

In my country, people often struggle for position while driving and don't stay in their lanes so that everything becomes a mess. ---- this is the correct way. :-)