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Two different preferences of music site- TASK 1 IELTS


NinaJoesuf25 36 / 66 4  
Nov 12, 2016   #1
A breakdown of the information about the number of visitors in two different preferences of music on the website in a 15- day period is shown in the line graph. Overall, it is extremely important to bear in mind that all the figures tend to increase. What's more, the number of visitors of Pop parade is the most dominant music website.

Initially, the most popular new music websites is Pop parade, being seen 120,000 visitors. However, apart from a brief fluctuation from day 1 to day 9, the number of visitors on pop parade site increases gradually at over 140,000 in day 10. By contrast, the figure of music choice visitors is just 40,000 in the first day. It is followed by a slight decrease in the following day, the number of music choice visitors remain relatively stable at less than 60,000 visitors per day until day 11.

In sharp contrast to this, the visitor number see pop parade site decline gradually until it overtake the other in day 12, at 100,000. Nevertheless, apart from a brief rise again in day 13, it reaches a peak of over 160,000 and both of figures widen up a gap each other eventually.



Madina S 3 / 2  
Nov 12, 2016   #2
What's (It is informal, use also, moreover, furthermore instead) more, the number (...) is the most dominant music website. (not always)

..., being seen (by) 120,000 visitors.

... the visitor number see (of) pop parade site (has) decline(d) gradually until it overtake(overtook) the other in day ...
... of figures widen up a gap (I am not sure but I think it should be "between" here) each other eventually.

We use preposition on with day, not in


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