Writing Task 1 (unit 3 Workbook CECI) Survey about the essential of communication skill for job

The table reports the survey about the important skills of communication for many people used in their job in 1997 and 2006. And how the important skills of communication vary according people community (Eksternal and Internal).

From the eksternal community, it is result that the most important skills in communication is dealing with people with 60 and 65 in both year respectively. While the skill on selling product or service is the most insignificant with around twenty people. In addition the middle priority of communication skill are knowledge about the product service and advising or caring the customer with 35-41 people.

In the internal area communication within company people has different priority. Listen carefully other colleagues is strongly important skills to communication with 38 -47 people. In the other hand making speeches or presentation is little important skills with less than 12 people. Moreover, the other medium urgency of communication to other are persuading or influencing, instructing or training, and planning the activities ranged 14-30 people.

To conclude, all of the communication skills are important to use in the community but skills on dealing with customers and listen carefully to other colleagues is the top priority for many people to help their job.

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Hello ZiadRasyid24

I am very keen on reading this writing
I will give you a few suggestion to improve your writing

The table reports the survey about the important skills ...
The table informs about the result of survey exactly at the important skills of communication for many people used in their job in 1997 and 2006. The data is differentiated based on how the important skills of communication vary according people community (Eksternal and Internal).Overall , all of the communication skills are important to use in the community ...

To conclude, all of the communication skills are important to use in the community but skills on dealing with ...
(I suggest, this sentence is moved into paragraph 1 so that your paragraph 1 have 3 sentences because it is better)

Hello, @ZiadRasyid24

I am a learner as you are. I can not correctly feedback about the grammatical errors. But, I can check whether it is understandable or not. As you know, it is also an important key point that the examiner will score you.

From the eksxternal community, it is result that the most important skills in communication is dealing with people with 60 and 65 in both year respectively (Who is dealing? I think you wanted to say something else). While the skill on selling product or service is the most insignificant with around twenty people. In addition the middle priority of communication skill are knowledge about the product service and advising or caring the customer with 35-41 people.(Do the middle priority of communication skill knowledge?I think you wanted again say something else).

Second paragraph has also the same mistakes.

I hope my comment does not have grammatical error. :)

Bests,

Hello, Ziad.
Here some suggestions for your writing.

From(you can use with regards to or to begin with) the externalcommunitycommunication , it is result that the most important (...) with 60 and 65 percent in both years respectively. While the skill on selling product or service is the most insignificant with around twenty people.(alternative: However, the figure for selling product or service saw the reverse) . In addition, the middle priority of communication skill (...) customer with 35-41 peoplepercent .