Hi Tutors, please help me to check this essay, will be much appraciated! Any commends will be helpful.
Hi Mommmmo!
Here there no tutors dear! Everybody's just like you and do their best to help each other : )
t is not a news that new graduates can't easily survive in realityreal world nowadays
usually self-centre and lack of practical skills are make job-finding harder and harder.
they make / they are makingEven though there is something university could improve, but personally I still think students should take the responsible themselves.
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... improve what? you should specify!Your introduction follows the required structure... But pay attention to grammar and clarity of your ideas. I suggest you to write shorter and more simpler sentences. They help you arrange your flow!The priority reason for students gathering in university is to become more professional in their major.
You should use the words carefully in sentences so that they would not become redundant. Here there are a few words that do not add value to your idea, and in fact they harm its smooth flow. Just take them off and see;The priority reason for university students is to become more professional in their major.... This sounds much better : )