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[IELTS] University education restriction. Just for best students? Agree or not?


SalMon 27 / 113 10  
Jun 3, 2014   #1
Topic: University education should be restricted to the very besst academic students, rather than being available to a large proportion of young people.
To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Universtiy is an entrance to life. It equips us with a package of wisdom and virtue to succeed. It is the importance of university that raises a question whether students with best scholastic performance deserve university study or just any young wishful people. Both sides are to be discussed before a conclusion is reached.

To begin with, outstanding academic students are eligible for university due to their intellectual advantage. To be precise, such abstract or complicated informatin, easily absorbed by those students, may prove as a matter of pressure for those who lack equivalent skills. Besides, it is undeniable that one deserves what he has done. University is like a gift presented to those who have gone to great length to attain.

However, university is not just about academic studies but also a place to nurture artistic talent and develop soft skills. Therefore, it should be up for grabs for a majority of young people, who wish to pursue their passion as well as develop comprehensively.

What is more, there is a tendency for social vices to rise if university is to be restricted to only the best people. Apart from the disheartened ones, many devoiding of neccessary preparations are likely to be recipes for failure when applying for jobs, mostly the white-collar ones.

In conclusion, university restriction has both pros and cons. In my opinion, it will yield more negative results than positive ones. That's why it should be made available for a wide range of learners.

Could you guys review my essay? I feel this one is not as good as the previous. If able, will you please replace some of the repeated words in my essay: "university", "skills", "students"

"may prove as a matter of pressure for those who lack equivalent skills" how can you rephrase this, cuz I find it a little not academic ??

Thank you guys a lot!
fikri 5 / 317 71  
Jun 3, 2014   #2
If you want to write a balanced answer for an "agree or disagree" question, it's important to get the introduction right.
this is an example :

Nowadays celebrities are more famous for their glamour and wealth than for their achievements, and this sets a bad example to young people.
To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Here's my introduction. Notice that I use a "while" sentence to express my balanced opinion.

It is true that some celebrities are known for their glamourous lifestyles rather than for the work they do. While I agree that these celebrities set a bad example for children, I believe that other famous people act as positive role models.


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