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Video games having an adverse effect on the people who play them - is that truth, give your opinion.

chitrinh_389 1 / -  
Jan 26, 2018   #1

Pros and cons of video games

Topic: Some people regard video games as harmless fun, or even as a useful educational tool. Others, however, believe that videos games are having an adverse effect on the people who play them. In your opinion, do the drawbacks of video games outweigh the benefits?

Some parents consider video games a helpful mean for entertainment and education, while others claim that their children are under negative influence of computer games. Despite some certain positive effects of these games on users, I argue that they have more disadvantages than advantages.

On the one hand, video games can be helpful in improving the brain's speed. While gaming , the brain receives multiple simulations, both visual and audial. According to research, individuals who play video games frequently can process these simulators faster than others. These simulators ensure that the brain is continuously working to interpret them.

On the other hand, I argue that the benefit above could be outweighed by the drawback. One typical disadvantage is that video games could negatively affect the mental health of the players. Playing electronic games discourages loses the gamers interests to involve in in following their daily routine in normal way such as playing sports or hanging out with friends; thus, they are not fascinated about performing outdoor activities anymore. One striking example of this is the appearance of an interactive game as a form of mobile application called Pokemon Go, which attracts a huge number of youngsters, including children. Unfortunately, this addictive game leads causes the players to be addicted to the point that they ignore traffic their daily routine and even play it when they are on busy streets. As a result, the gamers not only remain in their own virtual world reduced contacts with the outside world and but also bear causes the risks of accidents to not only themselves but also other drivers.

Holt [Contributor] - / 9,061 2735  
Jan 27, 2018   #2
Trinh, this is an essay that will not pass in an actual test setting due to the word count presented. The minimum for a Task 2 essay is 250 words. You wrote only 221 words. that means you are short of the minimum count by 29 words. The 250 words should also be presented in a 5 paragraph format composed of a 3-5 sentences each. Your essay is missing a proper introduction, an additional body of paragraph, and a concluding summary statement at the end. These are the reasons why your essay is not being presented in the proper format.

This is an opinion essay. As such, all opinion essays must present a singular point of view, without ever making reference to a comparison statement as you did in this essay. The body of paragraphs should only justify your opinion based upon the following (in paragraph form):

1. Public opinion
2. Personal opinion
3. Example to support the given opinion

Afterwhich, all the information should be significantly summarized in the closing summary paragraph.

When you write these essays, do not outline your writing as you did in this one. You should not separate your opening statement from the rest of the essay by indicating "Method 1". Remember, you should only write one version of the essay without identifying what type it is. You don't have the time to compare 2 versions of your writing in the actual test due to the need to review, revise, and edit the essay that you will have written at that point. You should be practicing this early, to write in one method. Make sure that it is the method that you are comfortable writing in. That is also the reason why your second method posting was deleted by the admin. We have a one essay per thread ruling here and your 2 method posting constituted a violation of that rule. Hence, the deletion that was done.

Work on presenting a more effective opening statement. You cannot present less than 3 sentences per paragraph as you will lose points for that. Rather than writing run on sentences or dividing your thoughts using commas, use a period instead. That is guaranteed to also help you achieve the proper word count as you will be forced to write longer sentences to express yourself, thus allowing you to create more complex sentence presentations in the process. A more proper opening statement could be:

Videogames are seen as a method of safe entertainment and a learning instrument by some. Others only see a negative aspect to the activity for a number of reasons. I believe that videogames have more drawbacks than benefits for the players. I will discuss my reasons for this below.

The opening summary should be composed of information that will outline your body of paragraphs. In this instance, the outline indicates:
1. The topic for discussion
2. The 2 opinions regarding the topic
3. Your personal opinion as the main discussion point

Based on the information provided in the original prompt, your paraphrased opening could be as much as 5 sentences, which would definitely help to increase your scoring potential. Since you provided less than the required number of words, you will also receive points deductions for that so don't expect to get a passing score when you write less than 250 words. Between the lacking word count and other errors in your writing and essay development, you won't be left with much of a score per criteria.

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