Task 2: Violence in Media Upgrade Hardness in Society?

Violence in media still exist until know found in television such as variety shows, movies, and tv series. Some people believe this content upgrade the violence in society, particularly bring negative effect on children, whereas others think violent media are not big deal because there is censors intitution who preserve the content. Although, there are argument both of the side, I strongly agree that violance will impact to raise the hardness in society.

The first is the violent content is important to a television series storyline. It means when overall the content of hardness eliminated, the storyline will be confuse. Therefore, censors intitution would be substantial part to minimize the violence that will be make the story flaw. News also show hardness content which is part of the it. Beside of the visual, in the dubbing reporter describe is not good for intimate. So, violent content can not be cut.

However, I believe that hardness in media brings a negative effect. People will imitate what others do in television particularly on children. For example, children who in the growth period love to follow what others perform. In 1965, Albert Bandura presented a research about children with an aggressive model. The model lay the Bobo doll down and was violent towards it and the children watched this action in the video. Then, Bandura put the children in a room with a Bobo doll to see if he/she would imitate the behavior previously seen on the video. The findings of this experiment suggest that children tended to model the behavior they witnessed in the video. Therefore, since that's new and interesting for them, they try to imitate.

To conlude, although there are some good impacts for violance content. I would argue the impact on the hardness in media too serious to society, it will be upgrade violance in society.

- Violence in the media still
- exist until knownow,it is
- as in variety shows,
- this content upgraded the violence in society, - are not a big deal,
- arguments both of the sides , - that viole nce( mind your spelling ) - will impact to raise the hardness inaffect the rise of crisis of the society.

- when the overall the content
- of hardnessroughness is eliminated,
- the storyline will be confusecomplicated . - Therefore, censors ins titution
- would be a substantial
- will be make thea flaw in the story flaw .

Hi Mimi, as you can see, I took the liberty to provide corrections on the first few paragraphs of your essay and I hope you follow through for the remaining few paragraphs of the essay. Be very careful with your sentence construction and turn on that spell checker. Keep writing.

Hi,Mimi:

Here are some ideas you can use in this topic:

1.the primary purpose of journalists covering the details of violent behaviors and actions is, more often that not, to boost newspaper circulation of TV ratings.

2.the younsters who lack the ability of distinguishing right from wrong are very likely to imitate those violent behaviors and they would become aggressive and hostile, which will cause the rate of juvenile delinquency vastly increase.

3.a vast number of violent contents and TV programmes would render those law-abiding and peace-loving citizens to consider that they are surrounded by many wrongdoers, which will arouse the social atmosphere of apprehension and anxiety.The stability and security of the entire sociey will be gravely affected.

Hope that can help you!

Hi justivy and sixiaojing thank you for your corrections

Hi Mimi, thanks for appreciating our work here on EF and I hope you continue to post your work here on EF and keep us as one of your helpful and useful choice in coming up with a strong essay.

What I would suggest for future writing reference is that, keep the ideas of your sentences, flow smoothly, make sure that the words that you associate in your sentences are clear and truly embodies the ideas that you are trying to convey to your readers, even more so, to yourself.

There's one exercise that I also practice and it is very effective, when writing, try to read your sentences aloud, now, when you hear that there is something off, that means there is something that needs to be done and this one will be addressed right there and then. This practice will lessen the mistakes that you get in constructing the sentences and in the end, will help you come up with a must better essay.

Well, I hope this is only a start of your writing, I do wish to review more of your writing articles, remember, it does not necessarily have to be an essay, any writing material or even some random questions that you may have, you can post it here and we will do our very best to assist you and provnide you with useful insights.