Just give them money
It is true that international organisation are joining hands in helping developing countries. While some people believe that they should give nations practical support and suggestion, I would argue that it is more beneficial when helpers provide them with money.
Hands- on aid and advice brings about both positive and negative effects. In fact, it is a common way to pass well-accumulated knowledge and experience on to poorer countries of antiquated technology. Vietnam milk manufacturers, for example, have brought their domestic products to Europe, United States, Japan...,which is likely an incredible success, thanks to their application of standard process of feeding cows transferred by FAO- a famous universal association. On the other hand, it is clear that the more advice intercontinental institution provide for the third world, the more depending they become. Authorities will not have any motivation to be creative, hard-working and active to get to the bottom of national problems. In other words, their national destination depends on oversea consultancy; as a result, they are always in the boring circle of poverty regardless of foreign assistance. Furthermore, there are fundamental differences among nations and it turns out to be unsuitable for foreigners to apply their mindset to education incentives or diplomatic process in developing countries.
By receiving money from international aid, the third world countries could easily utilize their own comparative advantages to gain economic success, which is the root of stable progress in any countries. Firstly, government are able to spend money building infrastructure, such as transport system, port facilities,... in order to attract more foreign investment. Secondly, if companies there are accessible to low interest of rate from the universal bank, they will take advantage of low-cost labor force, cheap raw material available in host countries to reduce manufacturing cost. Therefore, they might compete well with the challenging world market and make a great contribution to the economic prosperity. It is undeniable that financial help gives firm more and more chances to be successful in the long-term.
To sum up, I believe that it is more advantageous for developing countries to receive money than practical aid and suggestion.
Holt Educational Consultant - / 15385 Nguyen, please provide the complete prompt requirement every time you post your essay for review. The prompt requirement helps us to identify the points for analysis within your essay. I am able to do this without the prompt because of my familiarity with the exam questions. However, the others who are not familiar with the question but want to help you will be unable to do so. The prompt requirement is for their benefit.
Now, as far as the this essay is concerned, the actual requirement is for you to do a comparison analysis of the advantages and disadvantages of giving international aid to poor countries. Based on that prompt requirement, this essay will immediately fall under the score range of 3 because you did not properly discuss the essay. There was no reference to a disadvantage within your essay and you made the whole presentation a personal opinion paper. Since your opinion is not required by the prompt, there was no need for your to take ownership of the discussion. Thus the failing score. Even your concluding sentence is not appropriate for the discussion. It is only a single sentence when the requirement is a minimum of 3 sentences. Writing 352 words in this essay is not going to help if you did not discuss the essay in the manner instructed by the prompt requirements.
Hi Nguyen, welcome to Essay. I hope you can harness this medium as well as possible because you can improve your skill in this website. In this moment, I and others will find a difficulty to give you more because you did not present prompts so that we have not know guideline from edges of what you should explain. However, I am gonna try offering a few suggestion generally.
Nguyen, please you meet the requirement when you write a paragraph. You are supposed to write at least three sentences in each sentence. Turning to your grammar, you have been confused about the usage of verb agreement. There you should place verb+s/es, but you forgot. Actually, there is a paramount thing which you should focus. Your flow is not enough good, which can confuse readers to understand what you mind. Keep in your mind that your job in the writing task 2 is to communicate with the examiners so that you are supposed to guide them to geeting the point from your essay.
Honestly, I have not foudn the key points of your essay because there is a corelation between what you will describe atthe thesis statement in the introcutory paragraph and the first sentence in the first paragraph. Unfortunately, you also did not display the requirement so that I have not known what you want to achieve in this explanation.
Hopefully, you include the statement/ question in the next essay so that we can know the prompts of the essay.
Happy writing
First of all, I would like to thank you for your precious comment. I would like to empathize that the question is that:" Some people think that developing countries need financial help from international organizations. Others think that it is practical aid and advice that is needed. Discuss these views and give your own opinion". I think if you read this thesis and read my essay again, it will be different.