IELTS - wealth countries achieved over 4.0% in 60s and declined sharply under 3.0 percent in 1970

The graph below shows the average growth in domestic product in wealthy countries, countries that have adopted a global approach to business and countries that have not.

First in all, the chat depicts the average annual Gross Domestic Product (GDP) growth over ranging 1960-to-1990. There are mentioned three aspects; wealth countries, globalisers and non-globalisers.

A more detailed look at the bar chart informs that wealth countries achieved over 4.0% in 60s and declined sharply under 3.0 percent in 1970. Moreover, wealthy countries had dramatically decrease with 2.2% in 1980 and got the lowest percentage in 1990 (2.0%).

Moving onto globalisers countries, in 1960, the percentage of globalisers had 1.4%, while significant increased to over 2.5% in 1970 onwards. What is more, globalisers countries sat a peak in 4.9% in 1990.

Turning to the data non-globalisers countries had 2.3% in 1960 and increased gradually in 1970 (3.2%). Standing in contrast, in 1980, the percentage of non-globalisers feel significantly to 0.8%, while there was dramatically increase to 1.5$ in 1990.

If we analyze the data which informs that the globalisers countries was growing continuously and in the last period got a peak in over 4.5%. However, the wealthy countries year-by-year declines ironically from 1960 achieved 4.8% to 1990 reached 2 percent.

In my eyes, the countries which were adopting globalisers would get the highest percentage in the 1990, while the countries which were following non-globalisers had random percentage from 1960 to 1990. However, we have to consider with the wealthy countries which had dramatically decreased year-by-year.

please upload chart also.

Yes, you should upload the chart for us to see and get some idea as to what it presents. You can do it by clicking on Attach file(s) in the message block and then selecting your file.

This is the structure I recommend for this task;
1. Introduction (the first line of your essay is good enough for this prupose)
2. Overview - You need to mention the major trends very briefly here.
3. Details - Now you can start discussing further details with statistical support.

Hello dumi and sajeeb, it is the picture of my essay. I'm really welcoming for your correction.

• 
  
  

Well, I think you need to have a different approach for this task. This is what I suggest;
1. Introduce the graph (Write one or two sentences that introduce your graph to the reader. Do this by paraphrasing the title of the graph - make sure to include time frame it there's one)

2. Give an overview (You also need to state what the main trend or trends in the graph are. Don't give detail such as data here and tell them your major observations)

3. Give the detail (You can now give more specific detail in the body paragraphs)