Wild animals have no place in 21st century, so protecting them is a waste of resources.

low priority of Wild animals protection

Some people believe that wildlife doesn't worth being preserved as they have no priority in the 21st century. Personally, I strongly disagree
with the statement above
In my opinion, it is absurd to argue that wild animals have no place in the 21st century. As the increase in the world's population, more lands, and animals' habitats are being exploited for farming or building large-scale infrastructure, and innovative facilities. However, there is plenty of rooms in high-rise apartments for us to dwell. As a result, we can utilize the remain of space for animals. Furthermore, there are no compelling reasons why we should let these species be on the brink of extinction.

Moreover, I also disagree with the idea that conservating wildlife is a waste of resources due to its significant advantages for the world. It appears that protecting natural resources ensures the survival of these wild animals. To be more precise, when we guard the biological diversity of rainforests means we stabilize

the Earth's climate because rainforests absorb Carbon dioxide and release oxygen for breathing. They prevent many specific regions from flooding reservoirs. By protecting natural dwellers and their habitats, we can maintain the sustainability of the Earth

To put everything in a nutshell, it is believed that wild animals have no place in the 21st century, so people have no obligation to protect them. From my point of view,

I totally disagree with that idea because they are precious and humans have no right to let them die out.

The prompt given is an opinion. Where no extent or disagree response is asked for, the writer must discuss the essay from a logical point of view. Does the writer share the same opinion ? Why or why not? The rephrasing should only be 3 sentences long:

1. Restate the topic
2. Answer if one shares the opinion (e.g. I can understand why one would think this. / I can see reasons to not believe this statement)

3. Give a summary of 2 supporting reasons.

The essay is frustrating to read because the writer shows a total disregard for paragraph formatting. A consideration heavily observed by the examiners. Expect severe deductions because of this. Careless writing will always result in a failing score.

Fellow student here trying to get better at writing essays. Not a professional so take my opinion as you like. I think it would help you a lot if you were to read what you write as you do so. I used to write like this but then I read them and I realized how much I could improve on what I wrote. A big part of what I think could be improved would be on how you explain something. I think you have to elaborate on your argument more. Just makes your point of view a lot easier to comprehend and makes it more convincing.