IELTS 9 wiriting task 1 : maps of an island before and after constructed

Analysis of the provided maps

Task 1
The two maps below show an island, before and after the construction of some tourist facilities.
Summerise the information by selection and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

My essay：
The maps of theisland compare the differences between with or without the tourist facilities.

It is clear that after the construction, there are not just trees anymore but with houses, roads, pier and so on.
Besides these actual facilities, on the map we can see there are activities design based on the nature resources, such as boat, beach and swimming area.

Thought it become much crowded on the island, there's still spaces remain undeveloped.
It's obvious that all the places for tourist are gathering in the same area.
This would make it easier to other destination, and it wouldn't bother too much time and traffic tools to make it.

I cannot properly review this essay because of 2 reasons:

- You did not provide the images for comparison and review
- You wrote only 109 words

The images, I use for comparing the data you indicate in your report. The word count should be at least 150 words for the Task 1 essay. There is no way this essay will get a passing score because you wrote only 109 words. It is severely under the minimum word count. The percentage points deduction for the word count will not allow this essay to gain a passing score.

The writing format is incorrect. You have presented the data in poetry writing style rather than a complete paragraph composed of 3-5 sentences each. You are writing a data report, not a poem. Fix the format write the related sentences successively in the given paragraph. Do not use creative writing style formatting for a Task 1 essay.