IELTS Wirting Task2 Happiness definition

IELTS Wirting Task2 Happiness

As a positive spiritual experience, happiness may be seen as an invaluable treasure in most people's hearts. In society, we can see all sorts of people are in pursuit of their happiness. Some people may argue that accompanies with family has the meaning of utmost happiness, while other may hold the firm belief that only the success in one's career means happiness. So, everybody has his/her own opinion about the definition of happiness. And that's why it is difficult to define happiness.

In my opinion, no matter what definition of happiness you take, there are three relatively unchangeable factors critical to achieve happiness. The first and the most important factor is the clear knowledge or understanding about the happiness you want to achieve. Although it has a wide range from success in career, accompanies with family to anything you like, you ought to pick just one as your understanding of happiness. Two or more may distract your time and energy, leading your effort to come to nil. Further, the effort you devote in your pursuit of happiness is the second factor. If you are reluctant to devote your time, your energy, happiness is always in your dream and has no chance to be achieved. Someone may think the two factors above is enough, but it's essential to add contemplation and reflection as the third factor. Only by reflection can you obtain further understanding of the happiness you want to achieve and lose yourselves to enjoy the happiness you have got.

Happiness is such a thing everyone yearn to obtain, but different people have different understanding of it. With clear understanding of three factors above, I hope happiness could be closer to you.

While the essay more than meets the required word count, the presentation format is incorrect. The IELTS Task 2 requirements are as follows:

Paragraph 1: Prompt paraphrase + personal opinion based on a thesis statement

Paragraphs 2-3: Explanatory paragraphs that establish the basis of the personal point of view statement. One topic per paragraph.

Paragraph 4: A summarized version of the preceding topic, opinion, and supporting reasons.

The writer has not met the response format requirements with this presentation. He should not have began his opinion explanation in the first paragraph. This portion should have established his discussion representation instead.

The reasons need to number no more than 2. Each reason should be fully developed individually. This presentation is lacking in both analysis and development since attention to detail was overlooked.

The concluding summary does not meet the 40 word requirement and does not properly recapitulate the previous topic and discussion points. It does not properly close the essay.

While the essay is a bit acceptable, achieving a passing score may be difficult due to the lacking scoring expectations. The writer should use the correct format next time.