Looking for Suggestions on My College Admission Essay

Hello everyone,

I've written my college admission essay and I'm hoping for some insights. The prompt asked me to describe a personal challenge and how I dealt with it. I'm unsure if my story flows well and if the conclusion ties it all together effectively.

I'd appreciate any thoughts or advice on the structure and overall presentation. Thanks in advance for your time!

Abel Nicholas You must post the essay here.

You must post your essay to receive a review of the content based upon the concerns you stated. I can offer you a guideline though for your response review before you post the essay.

Does the story flow well? Provided you do not include too many side stories or unrelated situations in the presentation, the story should find itself well connected from point to point. Focus on your target discussion at all times and make sure that all narrations circle back to that point at the end.

Does the conclusion tie everything together? Provided you efficiently transition the paragraphs and use related discussion points, there should not be any reason for you to not have a perfectly tied in response to the prompt you have chosen. It should, like I previously mentioned, circle back to the point that you successfully dealt with the obstacle.

I am unable to present any more useful tips to you at thispoint. I need to review the essay presentation to find any loopholes or weak points Tha you can improve upon. I will wait for you to post the essay here.