I was ranked 500 between millions of students, and I can select top majors in Iran

SOP to get phd in chemical engineering

Dear moderators
could you help me to improve my essay and make it more powerful.

My name is XX, a chemical and process engineer, the title that I really love because I actually love chemical engineering. For this high passion it's enough that, in Iran there is a test that called KonKoor. This test is between all students in the country that finish high school and want to enter university. I was ranked 500 between millions of students, and I can select top majors in Iran (Electrical and mechanical engineering) for studying at university but I select chemical engineering (not really top in Iran) and of course I am glad for this selection.

I entered university in 1998 and I've got my B.Sc. degree in chemical engineering from XXX University in 2002 with average GPA of: 17.25 in the scale of 20 (A degree). During seven semesters that I've been passing my courses I was ranked 1st student (according to my degree in courses) between all my classmates. The title of my thesis in B.Sc. was" XXXXX".

After finishing B.Sc., I entered to XXX University to get M.Sc. degree in Separation Processes Design. I've worked in Research Centre for XXXX, Faculty of Chemical Engineering, with my supervisor (Dr. XXX) and co-researchers in the field of XXX technology. My thesis title in M.Sc. was "XXX". I've got my M.Sc. degree in 2004 with average GPA of: 17.23 in the scale of 20 (A degree) and ranked as a first student among 10 persons in this major. One of the reasons that I didn't get PhD directly after finishing M.Sc. was that I really want to be familiar with industry and understand the industry's problems. My work experience fulfills me in this matter. As I really love research as well as chemical engineering, I tried to work in a research center. And of course I could. Now I am working in XXX Research Institute from 2005 to now. This institute deals with all research projects that relating to XXXXand is the only one in Iran in this field. It has more than 300 researchers that most of them were top students from good universities of Iran. I am working in XXXX Department of this institute. We are working in projects that deal with the XXXX. I have worked in several research projects as a researcher or project manager, but as I worked in the field of membrane systems at university and I loved this technology, the most recent and important project that I am working now is titled" XXXXX" In this project, I am the project manager and more than 4 researchers work with me. This project is the first XXXX in Iran that uses membrane contactors technology. As we are an industrial Institute, we work directly with industry and will install this system in one of industries of Iran.

According to background of XXX university and powerful and also excellent professors of chemical and process engineering of this university, and as it's an industrial university and collaborates directly with industry, I really love to study in that university as a PhD candidate.

The favorable research interests of me are:
1- New and economic methods of XXXXX (pre combustion or post combustion).
2- Membrane separation processes.

Thank you in advance. Looking forward to your prompt response.

For this high passion it's enough that, in Iran there is a test that called KonKoor.----It's enough that... this does not make sense here.

This test is between all students in the country that finish high school and want to enter university. I was ranked 500 between millions of students, and I can select top majors in Iran (Electrical and mechanical engineering) for studying at university but I select chemical engineering (not really top in Iran) and of course I am glad for this selection. You used too many words to express a simple idea. I think you are thinking too much about the writing. You should think about one IMPORTANT idea you want the reader to gain about you. What is the single idea that you want the reader to remember about you?

I think it is an idea about your plan, your intention. What are you going to do?

I don't think you should tell the reader all the numbers, the GPA, etc. The reader can see that on your transcript.

You should tell the reader about a plan, something you want to accomplish. If you read the news, and if you read chem. engineering journal articles, you will know what the world needs. Make a plan, and explain the plan to the reader. Show the reader one big idea.

I like this part:
One of the reasons that I didn't get PhD directly after finishing M.Sc. was that I really want to be familiar with industry and understand the industry's problems. My work experience fulfills me in this matter. As I really love research as well as chemical engineering, I tried to work in a research center. And of course I could . Now I have been am working in XXX Research Institute from 2005 to until now. This institute deals with all research projects that relating to XXXXand is the only one in Iran in this field. It has more than 300 researchers that most of them were top students from good universities of Iran. I am working in XXXX Department of this institute. We are working in projects that deal with the XXXX. I have worked in several research projects as a researcher or project manager, but as I worked in the field of membrane systems at university and I loved this technology, the most recent and important project that I am working now is titled" XXXXX" In this project, I am the project manager and ...---This part is great. It shows your experience.

The favorable research interests of me are My research interests include:
1- New and economic methods of XXXXX (pre combustion or post combustion).
2- Membrane separation processes.

:-)

thanks kevin for your good comments. I will improve my essay and if its possible for you , then please give some notes to me.