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Posts by EF_Team5
Joined: Apr 22, 2008
Last Post: Nov 27, 2008
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EF_Team5   
Apr 27, 2008
Research Papers / Marketing Assignment of The Heinz U.S.A Company [24]

The second part was for citation assistance.

As for the second question, here are my thoughts.

The first paragraph, "Heinz will achieve sustainable growth by enhancing the nutrition, health and wellness of people and their communities. At the same time, increased health awareness and government campaigns urging people to reduce their intake of sugar, salt and fat are driving demand for healthy products." Should be removed. This does not have any direct bearing on the question your instructor posted; go ahead and start right off with the next sentence, "The coloured tomato was a success in the U.S. for a number of reasons" because this gets directly to the point.

The first paragraph on technology, I fail to see the connection between the nature of marketing and the success of colored ketchup products in the U.S. If you are going to use this part of the essay, it needs to be tied in directly to the question; as it is, there is no anchor to the topic of colored ketchup.

The second paragraph on product safety and environmental concern has the same problem. If you are going to use this paragraph, you need to apply it to their colored ketchup product line. How is this line safer or more environmentally aware than the other Heinz products?

The third paragraph on packaging, is the colored ketchup line the only one that features this type of bottling? Your instructor sounds like he/she wants to know exactly what it is about the single, specific product line of colored ketchup that made it so successful. You did a good job in the first question answering why it sold so well (satisfying children's wants and parent's needs), this part of the essay needs to tie into that first section. So far there is nothing specific to the colored tomato ketchup product line specified here, it seems to be why Heinz is a better company than others overall, and that is not what your instructor has asked; you don't mention the 'Blastin' Green' product name until you get to the part of the question about whether or not it would work in your home country.
EF_Team5   
Apr 27, 2008
Writing Feedback / A True Soccer Mom. There are many ways to learn, improve and fail at something. [5]

Good morning!

I like the concept of your conclusion, and I think with a little help cleaning it up you can really get your point across.

The first sentence, "With this all said, the mother feels that all the girls are having fun but not getting anything accomplished if they want to make this a full time sport for their lives" can be boiled down so it is not so wordy. How about something like, "With this all said, the mother feels the girls are having fun, but not acquiring any serious, long-term soccer skills."

The next sentence, "mother or coach in this case, is doing the best that she can do to make this worthwhile for the girls to grow so that someday and knows how to coach these girls to propel in the sport as their heart desires" could also be trimmed. How about something like, "The mother, or coach in this case, is doing her best to make this a worthwhile experience for the girls; she hopes that in the near future they can have a more experienced coach to help propel them to success in the sport they so dearly love".

Nice work!

Regards,
Gloria
Moderator, EssayForum.com
EF_Team5   
Apr 27, 2008
Poetry / I have to write a Poem Review (but I've never read any English poems!) [14]

Good morning!
You're welcome, I'm glad I can be of help!
As far as an analytical model, I'm not sure if that's what I would call it, but it is a good description :). In every poetry class I've been in and taught, it is more of an accepted way to encourage understanding and make analysis easier to digest. It works better with longer, more complex or more intricate poems because it makes the student stop and really contemplate the relationship of the line by itself and in its context.

Let me know if I can be of any further assistance!

Regards,
Gloria
Moderator, EssayForum.com
EF_Team5   
Apr 27, 2008
Essays / Help on thesis with Paradise Lost [9]

Good morning!
I'd like to start my reply with...WOW!! I am absolutely impressed! The transformation your essay has gone through is fantastic. This is quality work.

As far as your first question in regards to presenting various interpretations, I would present your interpretations just as you did above. Sure, go ahead and include the questions, but be sure you answer them completely to the best of your ability. It sounds like you have deeper interpretations; go ahead and explore them a little more. I agree that your instructor would appreciate it.

"For instance, Red Cross Knight's victory over Error accomplishes nothing but reveal his overweening pride."
Change "reveal" in this sentence to "revealing" for tense.

In regards to the capitalization of "he", this is up to you. It is acceptable to use lower case or capitalization, just make sure you are consistent throughout your entire essay by using one or the other exclusively.

"The writer of an allegorical work, like Red Cross Knight, tries to slay error..."
Just for clarification, if you are using "error" here as the name, make sure, since it is a proper noun, that you capitalize.

"I used "..." to leave out the word "was". Is that the right way of leaving things out of quotes?"

That is the correct form; however, make sure you take the comma out of the sentence in your paper. It looks like it reads " "vomit full of bookes and papers...,/"

"Though only used in a single instance with Sin and Death, allegory in Paradise Lost, does not reveal..."
Remove the comma after "Lost" as it is unnecessary.

Your conclusion is excellent. You have worked very hard on this paper, and you should feel very good about it.

Regards,
Gloria
Moderator, EssayForum.com
EF_Team5   
Apr 26, 2008
Writing Feedback / A True Soccer Mom. There are many ways to learn, improve and fail at something. [5]

Julie,
I enjoyed your essay, even if it was incomplete. I can totally identify with your account of a woman struggling to do something she knows nothing about. I found it to be refreshing and, because I've been in this woman's shoes, somewhat humorous.

My first question is why you chose to write it in this tense. Writing in the third person works really well, but I'm curious as to why you decided to use the present tense. It sets the essay on edge, and if this is what you desire, that's fine. I'm just curious.
EF_Team5   
Apr 26, 2008
Research Papers / Marketing Assignment of The Heinz U.S.A Company [24]

Good evening.
I was under the impression from your post that you only needed help trimming down the first question and assistance with citations. It seemed as if you were within your word count on the second section, and the prior moderator provided you with excellent constructive assistance on the second question.

I am unclear as to what you would like me to help you with in regards to question two.

Regards,
Gloria
Moderator, EssayForum.com
EF_Team5   
Apr 26, 2008
Poetry / I have to write a Poem Review (but I've never read any English poems!) [14]

Good evening. It looks like you have a really good start. Your analysis is personal and you give alternate impressions, delving into other areas of interpretation.

Generally, if you would like to analyze the poem line by line, you could phrase it like so:

There is another sky,
Describe other interpretations of sky (worlds, lives, etc.)
Ever serene and fair,
Recap in your own words the peacefulness of this other plane
And there is another sunshine,
Describe other alternative metaphors for sunshine

And continue on line by line. Your above paragraphs are much more clear and concise. Continue to focus your writing on exact interpretations and you will be successful.

Let me know if I can help further!

Regards,
Gloria
Moderator, EssayForum.com
EF_Team5   
Apr 26, 2008
Research Papers / Marketing Assignment of The Heinz U.S.A Company [24]

Christopher,

As far as the description for children's needs, I would just do as you did above; using no more than five sentences or so highlight what kids want and give a quick description of how Heinz has satisfied them.

Regards,
Gloria
Moderator, EssayForum.com
EF_Team5   
Apr 26, 2008
Research Papers / Marketing Assignment of The Heinz U.S.A Company [24]

Hello Christopher!

Just a couple of grammar and spelling errors to fix here.

Heinz has utilized(satsified- they aren't using consumer needs and wants, they are giving them what they desire) the needs and wants of (the) consumer by continuing to ...

As these are parts of consumer's want(s) and need(s) , thus (remove "thus"), Heinz starting (started) to add more color and squeezable bottle(s) with a singular shade brings (bringing) a fresh, new perspective ...

Nice job!

Regards,
Gloria
Moderator, EssayForum.com
EF_Team5   
Apr 26, 2008
Poetry / I have to write a Poem Review (but I've never read any English poems!) [14]

Good afternoon!

Good choice in a poem. Dickinson is a very deep poet who had many layers of meaning. I like how you addressed both the literal layer of this work along with the symbolic meaning you interpreted. You bring up a good observation as far as Emily being religious; do you think she was trying to convert her brother, perhaps enlightening him to her version of eternal life through religion? Also, another way to approach poetry analysis is to break down the work line by line and interpret the lines individually and how they relate to the other lines.

Just a few thoughts. :)

You're doing great, keep it up!

Regards,
Gloria
Moderator, EssayForum.com
EF_Team5   
Apr 26, 2008
Undergraduate / Essay On Life Goals [4]

Good morning Elizabeth!

Life goals are a very personal topic; it takes a great deal of bravery to put out your dreams to the world! Brava!

I would suggest changing your introduction; starting it with a question is kind of cheesy. How about rewording to read something like, "Selfishness is a large motivator when it comes to personal goals. Instead of wondering what an individual can get out of a situation, they should be wondering how they can help others. I help others by being a hospital volunteer" This makes your introduction bold and clearly states your viewpoint; it is aggressive rather than passive.

If this thesis is to be on your life goals, you should be in the forefront. Instead of meandering through social backgrounds, come at me immediately with your personal story about your mom. That creates impact; this shows me background on why YOU made your first statement. Think of a single story or memory that made the turning point for you. I can tell that your mother plays a large role in your life, and her career choice has made an impact on your life. Goals require confidence; make sure you infuse that into your writing. Show me (your reader), that you have the confidence it takes to be a good healthcare provider. It doesn't matter that you didn't contribute largely to these experience; instead, you were a sponge and let them soak into you, influencing you. That is a vital focal point of your story. This is something that you are passionate about, share that vibrancy and force in this essay.

Firstly, try and get organized. Outlines help me immensely when I am setting out on a project such as this. Start out with your thesis statement, and think of three more life events. How your mom influenced your decision, and perhaps two incredible memories you had during your healthcare experiences. Allow the last paragraph for your conclusion. Once you have those large pillars standing to support your essay, you can begin to recall finer points to fill in the space between those pillars; just like you are building a house.

I appreciate your dedication to your studies and your life goals. I can't wait to see what you come up with next!

Regards,
Gloria
Moderator, EssayForum.com
EF_Team5   
Apr 25, 2008
Book Reports / Literrary Critical Analysis Essay on Of Mice and Men [4]

Hello!
So that I can better help you, can you help me understand your situation a little better? If I am understanding your situation, it sounds like you are writing a thesis on [i]Of Mice and Men.[i]

Do you need help organizing, editing, or help with more ideas? It seems like your assignment requires you to show examples of isolationism in the book. If this is the case, I believe you have some really good groundwork. Might I suggest you elaborate a bit on exactly what kind of symbolism Steinbeck uses to foreshadow? Or, perhaps you could elaborate on the concept of isolation being inevitable.

If this is not what you need, please let me know so that I can better help you.

Regards,
Gloria
Moderator, EssayForum.com
EF_Team5   
Apr 25, 2008
Essays / Help on thesis with Paradise Lost [9]

Excellent work! I can trace through your thought processes in this posting, following you along from point to point as you digest the material. This is the whole point of critical analysis. I find that outlining my ideas, just as you have done here, not only helps me stay on track throughout an essay, but it saves me time because it is organized.

So now you have the major topics and your supporting details for each one. The next step is to elaborate on those supporting details (which you have definately already done) and add specific examples (which you also have already started doing). As for weak points, as long as you can cite a specific example from the work to illustrate your meaning, it is a good point; elaboration upon that point can only come from your individual interpretation of it.

It seems to me like you have satisfied the parts of your instructor's question, and as you say you have more than enough points. I would elaborate and clear up any confusion in a few spots.

Let's start with the finality comparison you outline in paragraph one. See if there is a deeper symbolism in this comparison, and if so, how can you use that to your advantage?

Also, I really liked your statement "Their names have English meanings and so they act as purely allegorical beings, rather than physical/literal beings." Elaboration about exactly how they act as allegorical beings will support this statement nicely.

You write "However, bringing in allegorical figures invite allegorical interpretation, which invites misunderstanding and conflicts in interpretation." Isn't that what interpretive literature is all about? Isn't that at the heart of why we read texts and discuss them? This is a wonderful observation; very astute.

"RCK defeating Error did nothing but reveal his overweening pride. Una warns him, but he does not listen to her warnings." Can you delve a little into why he doesn't heed her warnings? What are your thoughts on this desertion?

"In the back of Satan's mind, he seems to know that God is in control, yet his actions seem to suggest otherwise. His actions seem to suggest that he can somehow foil God's ultimate plan."

Can you use specific examples from the text to illustrate what actions "seem to suggest otherwise"? Use the text to your advantage; each statement you make is concreted by evidence.

"However, allegory though not without its problems, is very much what a writer wants in his work. the allegory of Sin in Paradise Lost, though only really used once, is not referring to the shortcomings of allegory."

I believe you mean to say that the use of allegory in this text is not perfect, and this imperfection is what the author desired. What do you think the allegory is referring to? You could clarify a little on this part, because it is somewhat confusing.

Once you have your examples and detailed supporting information added to the outline, you can use smooth transitions to link your subject pillars together; much like building a lincoln log house. First you have to put up the larger support beams, and then fill in the spaces, finally filling in any holes between the logs.

Your effort is clear, there is no need to apologize. I'm here to help, and everyone struggles, especially at schoolwork. I think that if you stay organized, everything else will fall into place for you. You have a very clear line of thought, and if you can keep that in the forefront, everything else can't help but get in line.

Keep up the great work!

Regards,
Gloria
Moderator, EssayForum.com
EF_Team5   
Apr 25, 2008
Research Papers / Marketing Assignment of The Heinz U.S.A Company [24]

As far as Harvard style referencing, the basic concept is that you cite in text and on a reference page. An in text citation might look like this:

"Another description provided in auditory examples of delusions is the "self talk" phenomenon (Carol, 1967, p. 98).

The reference page citation for this example would look like this:

Carol, A. (1967) Auditory Hallucinations in Schizophrenics, Cambridge: Cambridge University Press.

There are several ways to cite assorted works. For detailed examples of these, I would suggest searching the internet using the phrase "Harvard style referencing". It is one of the most frequently used citation systems, so there should be a large amount of information.

Please let me know if you need anything else!

Happy hunting!

Regards,
Gloria
Moderator, EssayForum.com
EF_Team5   
Apr 25, 2008
Research Papers / Marketing Assignment of The Heinz U.S.A Company [24]

Christopher,
Nice work on this essay; you did a really great job providing relevant, detailed information! I understand your concerns about trimming the essay up; sometimes this is just as hard as creating it in the first place-I mean, if it wasn't important you wouldn't have found a place for it in the text, would you?

OK, as far as trimming it up, I would start with this in mind. How can you answer the question concisely yet prove your knowledge about the topic you took so much time researching?

As far as the first question goes, I would cut out the introduction to the essay and instead begin it with this paragraph:
"Consumers want products that are not only delicious and nutritious but also of high pharmaceutical value and they have shown a growing demand for healthier food alternatives. Clearly, exactly, how has Heinz satisfied this want? Customer demands put pressure on companies to seek for new innovative products in order to remain competitive. Heinz ketchup makes important predictions and recommendations regarding the future of U.S. market, and pinpoints ways current and prospective marketers can capitalize on current trends and spearhead new ones. As healthy eating starts with getting the right balance of food in our diet, riding this wave of consumer sentiment, Heinz introduced certified organic ketchup, called "Heinz Organic Ketchup" and "Heinz Light", which is low sugar ketchup."

I suggest cutting out the beginning because your instructor is going to want the raw information pertaining to the question, and the beginning really is more of an introduction to someone (like me) who is unfamiliar with the topic. Your instructor probably already knows this information, so go ahead and chuck it. I believe this takes of 121 words; it's a start! I would also specify which consumer you are referring to: parents or children. It would help clarify for your instructor.

Next, I would cut out the paragraph "Consumer needs and wants are part of the marketing orientation. Needs are unsatisfactory conditions that prompt the consumer to an action that will make the condition better; wants are desires to obtain more satisfaction than is absolutely necessary to improve an unsatisfactory condition. (Hoffman, 2005) Within the food products marketing area, marketers have centered their attention on market and consumers." and instead show how Heinz has utilized this. For instance, cut directly to "Heinz Company targeted its market by understanding consumer behavior, how consumers perceived, learn, and make decisions to satisfy their needs and wants. Parents and kids are two segmented portions of a larger market." This takes off another 60 words. Further, I would suggest removing this paragraph "The Heinz Company took the needs and wants of children and parents into careful consideration when creating its products. They launched a series of marketing research techniques and strategies to understand the needs and wants of kids in relation to food consumption that they believed can tap into the growing market of their tomato ketchup line. While their "Blast"-derived descriptors are becoming all the rage on the consumer landscape, especially for products aimed at kids and young adults with the collaboration of Dream Works Productions, which is a popular animation company in U.S. Successfully, they willing to be creative and take chances especially if the outcomes are appalling to their parents." And reword it to concisely show WHY the "Blast" product line was what kids wanted. This explanation seems more in line with the question your instructor provided.

How about cutting out "Marketing communications play an essential role in creating positive brand equity and building strong brand loyalty. By the unique and positive images via advertising, Heinz established trust of brand gradually in their market segment. Consumers don't purchase "tomato ketchup" merely for its taste; they instead purchase a lifestyle and an image when selecting Heinz over other available brands as the significant attributes of Heinz had lodge in consumers' memories." Unless you are planning on specifically showing how brand loyalty is something a parent or a child wants; again, trying to stay within the confines of the instructor's question.

Cut out "Heinz's practice of CSR in their industry and will earn the respect and confidence of their customers." This is redundant because you have already talked about this earlier in the paragraph. Easy to trim out.

Try clarifying why the bright colors have been a BIG hit (instead of BIT). How about, "Because children are exposed to more colors at an early age, Heinz's green and purple ketchups, packaged in see-through containers with colorful labels, have been big hits". I would then cut out "Children's influence increases with age. They influenced household buying and often influence their parents' choice of products. Packaging technology continues to improve as consumers demand safer, more convenient, and recyclable containers. The classic narrow-neck design of the Heinz ketchup bottle established the norm for the industry.

Cut out "For example would be Kellogg's has teamed up with Disney to produce Mickey's Magix which is an 'enhancing' mix of colorful Mickey Marshmallows and oat stars that are sprinkled with ŇpixieÓ dust that turns the milk blue." because we want to make sure you are sticking to the original subject matter, which is Heinz, and not stray off onto other avenues (even though it's very tempting!)

Cut out "To prosper in a world of abrupt changes, newly emerging forces and dangers, and unforeseen influences from abroad, firms need to prepare themselves and develop active responses. (Hoffman, 2005, p. 99) Heinz continues to improve the quality of ketchup by developing tomato strains that are superior in colour, flavour, and firmness. Subsequent to the success of its Heinz Blastin' Green (HBG), the company continues to manufacture other lively colours in its product range and further research found that purple was the next favourite colours among the kids due to the "Harry Potter" phenomenon. Perhaps their robust quality assurance principles, procedures, standards, and technology help maintain Heinz's reputation as one of the most trusted brands in the world." As it does not directly pertain to the question asked, but mostly because you have covered a lot of this already. So far we've eliminated about 628 words, bringing you down to about 1,380. So we still need to trim off about 680 more words. Moving on.

Going back, how about revamping "The launching of Heinz Ketchup new marketing strategy is greatly supported by the success of green ketchup. Its taste exactly the same as red ketchup but fundamentally green ketchup gives children more control and creativity with their food. Mixing the red and green ketchup in designs also adds to the creativity. The colour green can connote naturalness, as it is found in nature in plants or trees, or disgust and repulsion as it is found in fungus and slime. Children however, are likely to look beyond these connotations of colour and use it because it is fun and shocking to their parents" to read, "Green ketchup gives children what they want: more control and creativity with their food, while still implicating wholesomeness by its green color.

How about rewording "Consumers want products that are not ..." To something like, "Consumers want products not only delicious but nutritious and show this by demanding healthier food. Heinz answered that demand by introducing certified organic ketchup, called "Heinz Organic Ketchup"; they also introduced "Heinz Light", a low sugar option."

How about reworking this, "Within the food products marketing area, marketers have centered their attention on market and consumers. The Heinz Company took the needs and wants of children and parents into careful consideration when creating its products. They launched a series of marketing research techniques and strategies to understand the needs and wants of kids in relation to food consumption that they believed can tap into the growing market of their tomato ketchup line. While their "Blast"-derived descriptors are becoming all the rage on the consumer landscape, especially for products aimed at kids and young adults with the collaboration of Dream Works Productions, which is a popular animation company in U.S. Successfully, they willing to be creative and take chances especially if the outcomes are appalling to their parents." To something like "The Heinz Company took the needs and wants of children and parents into careful consideration when creating a line of "Blast" ketchups: (I'm not sure what they are, so you could insert a short description here)".

How about rewording this, "According to Gerber (2007), parents are focusing on the family's influence on children's consumption of these foods as lifelong eating patterns are established early in life. It is in childhood that the family provides the first and perhaps most fundamental context in which children's relationship with food is formed. With respect to alternative evaluation, Heinz Company provides information about their products, promotions, meal planner, red zone recipes, etc to their customers with a more detailed information about the nutrition facts of the food products that their kids ingest. It enables the entire family to eat healthier, and save time and money." To something like "According to Gerber (2007), parents are focusing on the family's influence on children's consumption of these foods as lifelong eating patterns are established early in life. Heinz has responded by providing information about their products, including meal planners and red zone recipes with more detailed nutrition information." This cleans up your paragraph by eliminating redundancy and arriving quickly at your main focal point.

I think I would eliminate "The new Heinz bottle which was ergonomically designed with softer plastic material features custom fit curves and a nozzle. The fact that it can easily be handled by kids has contributed to the success of Blastin' Green concept. In addition, the main character SHREK, which created the 'green' world movie, will appear on the green bottles, while the fairy-tale heroine "Princess Fiona" will appear on the red bottles. For example would be Kellogg's has teamed up with Disney to produce Mickey's Magix which is an 'enhancing' mix of colorful Mickey Marshmallows and oat stars that are sprinkled with ŇpixieÓ dust that turns the milk blue.

To prosper in a world of abrupt changes, newly emerging forces and dangers, and unforeseen influences from abroad, firms need to prepare themselves and develop active responses. (Hoffman, 2005, p. 99) Heinz continues to improve the quality of ketchup by developing tomato strains that are superior in colour, flavour, and firmness. Subsequent to the success of its Heinz Blastin' Green (HBG), the company continues to manufacture other lively colours in its product range and further research found that purple was the next favourite colours among the kids due to the "Harry Potter" phenomenon. Perhaps their robust quality assurance principles, procedures, standards, and technology help maintain Heinz's reputation as one of the most trusted brands in the world."

Because you have already talked about a lot of this in your earlier paragraphs, and some of it does not pertain to the question your instructor presented. This brings you down to only needing to get rid of about 110 words. At this point I would look at any remaining long paragraphs you have and try to see if every sentence in them relates directly to what the question asks. You've done a lot of work here, and I'm sure your instructor will appreciate your effort.

I'm going to post the second section in another post, so there is more to come.

Regards,
Gloria
Moderator, EssayForum.com
EF_Team5   
Apr 24, 2008
Essays / Help on thesis with Paradise Lost [9]

Hi!
Well, let's start at the beginning. Break down the guiding question into smaller bits; sometimes these things can be overwhelming when taken in all at once. First, outline how you think Sin is more Spensarian than Miltonic. Second, how does Sin remind YOU of Error. What purposes could those thought-sparks have in the greater scheme of the work? Third, break down the encounter between Satan, Sin, and Death. By this time you should have a pretty good idea of the differences between Spenser and Milton, and some glaring critiques of Spenser's characteristics. As far as Spenserian allegory, try and think about what kind of symbolism lies beneath the literal meaning of this text. Are there any coincidences between the literal and the allegory? You might also try and research any background information you can find on the Faerie Queene.

I hope this will help a little!
EF_Team5   
Apr 24, 2008
Poetry / I have to write a Poem Review (but I've never read any English poems!) [14]

Good afternoon!

Well, where to start. Poetry is very vast and can be a little overwhelming. First of all, did your teacher assign you a text to use alongside of your readings? If so, there may be some great suggestions in that book. You could also search the internet for English poets.

If not, think about what kind of poetry you like best. Do you like haiku, pantoum, sonnet, etc? If you have a favorite there, you can search for that type of poem for your subject.

Once you have chosen a poem, try and learn a little bit about its author. Where did they grow up? What time period? Was there any important world events occurring during their lifetime? If so, could those have influenced their writings?

Analysis is basically your interpretation of a work. There are different methods you can go about to do this, but it normally ends up with what you think of the work and why. Try and focus on what you think the poem means and how you arrived at that meaning. Once you get started, digging out symbolism, themes, and imagery can help the process along.

You will probably want to stick to shorter poems to begin with, but that doesn't always mean they will be easy; sometimes authors use minimalism to get the highest concentration of meaning in the fewest words possible.

Good luck!

Regards,
Gloria
Moderator, EssayForum.com
EF_Team5   
Apr 24, 2008
Dissertations / How to write an abstract in a research paper or dissertation? [8]

Good afternoon Zahra.

An abstract for anything is just that; an abstract. This is a rough outline of what your paper will cover, with very few details. Your topic should be stated, and any other major important details (i.e. if you use statistical data, clinical trials, etc.). You don't want to include too much information, and keep it simple. You may try searching the internet for article abstracts, there are millions out there to give you finite examples.

Good luck!

Regards,
Gloria
Moderator, EssayForum.com
EF_Team5   
Apr 24, 2008
Research Papers / Marketing Paper: Golf Ball Product Category [4]

Good morning Spencer!
You have some really good questions for your paper. As far as research goes, I do not know anything about your topic, so I am afraid I cannot help you there. I would suggest researching using the internet, your school's library, or online library. You could start your reseach very wide and generally, perhaps searching for sports popular in certain cultures, and narrow from there.

When you have written your paper, feel free to post again for any help you may need! Good luck researching!

Regards,
Gloria
EssayForum.com Moderator
EF_Team5   
Apr 23, 2008
Writing Feedback / How to Cheat on The Exam - Process Analysis essay [6]

See, next time you'll have WAY less red, it's just inevitable because you're dedicated! Honestly, red is just what I'm used to, so don't take it personally :D

Thank you for such a warm welcoming! Keep up the great work!
EF_Team5   
Apr 23, 2008
Writing Feedback / How to Cheat on The Exam - Process Analysis essay [6]

Good afternoon! I can tell that you are dedicated to your studies, and are working hard to please your teacher; be patient with her, she only pushes you because she knows you can handle it! This essay shows you can!

Suggestions for conclusions:
Use your disclaimer as a basis for your conclusion. How about starting the last paragraph with something like, "Use the suggestions I have made here wisely..." or "These tips only are successful if they are followed to the letter. Make sure you follow them closely to ensure you become a master of the classic cheating method." Something such as this may work particularly well because it ties everything up nicely to your beginning statement.

While I cannot condone cheating, I enjoyed reading your essay, and I do appreciate your ingenuity. Keep up the good writing!


Regards,
Gloria
Moderator, EssayForum.com

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