Writing Feedback / Writing task 2 - Music is able to connect people from distinctive cultures and ages [2]

Topic :
Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together.

To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Similarity to some argue that music is an optimal choice for those who want to gather people from distinctive cultures and ages, I believe that music always plays an essential role in our society, particularly to unite and connect people from numerous nations in the world.

Thanks to the proliferation of technology, music could be quickly widespread across borders between one nation and other nations. Even though people come from different backgrounds, cultures, and languages that it is struggled for them to understand the meaning of lyric when listening to foreign music, they do have the ability to experience the rhythm of the music. Therefore, people could evaluate the music video produce by international artists. Besides, if they fond of that, they could be one of the fan communities who love to listen to the music produce by these artists. Their group members will share the music and information related to that artist in tandem with a vast myriad of comments from fans from different cultures post on this topic and how they connect and build relationships among group members. For example, many Vietnamese people are keen on the K-pop music band and join together with communities from other countries to unite in one group who loves that band.

The creation of music destroys the boundary among generations, utilizing the cutting-edge program, the producer could mix traditional music and modern music to create new music suitable for both old and young age. For instance, there is various remix music on the Internet, and some music contests are performed by music artists based on the traditional lyric and modern beat, which attract every generation from old to young.

In conclusion, the power of music is enormous and unique in its ability to generate shared experiences among people from different cultures and ages.

Writing Feedback / Writing task 2 - The role of sport in our societies [3]

Writing task 2:
Some people say that sports play an important role in society. Others, however, think that it is nothing more than a leisure activity.

Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

From the beginning of civilization, sports already have been a symbol of physical power, intelligence, wisdom. While some people argue that sports play a pivotal role in our society, others believe that it is only daily activity. This essay will shed light on both sides of those arguments and provide my perspectives.

On one level, for the long history of humans, sports are always the inherent part of a competition among people. In the ancient era, numerous sports contests were organized for people who want to get rewards. Those not only generate the golden opportunities for them to show off performance, create a reputation, but also attract the king who always wants to recruit the strongest army for empires. In the modern era, getting gold medal in an international contest also represents the power and image of the nation compared to other countries, especially in terms of football.

From another angle, sports are leisure activities for several reasons. In the era in which technology, science become the most important, the role of sports no longer powerful compare to the past. Furthermore, nowadays, the evaluation system to judge the value of people also change lead to sports become low potential.

In my opinion, Sports are beneficial for every people. First, an ordinary person who plays sports as a leisure activity could boost their health, refresh their mental health, and avoid various diseases. Second, organizing sports contests, particularly in king sport like football, is one of the optimal choices for organizers to earn profit.

In conclusion, while vast myriads of views about the role of sport in our societies, I suppose that without the support from sports, the human being communities are lost an essential puzzle piece of their life.

Writing Feedback / Some people claim that we can't always expect job satisfaction and a permanent job is more important [2]

Writing task 2 - Job satisfaction vs Job security

Some people argue that job satisfaction is more important than job security, while others believe that they cannot always expect job satisfaction, and a permanent job is more important. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

It is argued that job satisfaction plays an essential role when compare with job security, while another significant proportion of the population is believed in the importance of permanent job more than job satisfaction. From my perspective, while job permanent could bring several merits, I suppose that satisfactory working is a crucial element impact on our career in the long-term.

On the one hand, it cannot be denied that a permanent job provides a stable for our life. Employers who work for the firm guaranteed job security would have a stable income in tandem with the risk ratio to be dismissed low.

On the other hand, satisfaction job generates golden opportunities and confidence to promote themselves in the long run. By satisfying a career, people could boost their productivity in tandem with the ultimate passion for performance, while job security lacks those features. As a result, employments who immerse in fully satisfied will quickly achieve goals and get lucrative salaries and promote to higher position more than people who work in job permanent. For example, two students fond of code on the computer, but when a graduate one becomes a coder, they choose to work for a technology firm with a low income and high risk. In contrast, others prefer the job permanent in a marketing firm with a higher salary, low replace ratio. After five years of working hard, the coder becomes the executive of that technology firm while the marketer only earns more a little bit because he has no passion for this job.

In conclusion, job security only helps people in the short-term while job satisfaction will make their careers outstanding and significant. In my opinion, flowing the passion and achieve satisfactorily is the optimal way for every successor.

P/s: any one could recommend me some source useful for writing? Thank a lot!