Writing Feedback / dormitory or apartment - comparison essay [NEW]

please correct my essay and give me some tips how to improve my essay

?Students at universities often have a choice of places to live. They may choose to live in university dormitories, or they may choose to live in apartments in the community. Compare the advantages of living in university housing with the advantages of living in an apartment in the community. Where would you prefer to live? Give reasons for your preference?

Students have two options to choose where to live in university dormitories or in apartments. Besides both have advantages, preferences change from one student to another.

Many students prefer to live on campus instead of living out. Obviously it saves students time. Living on campus they do not need to spend their time on school way. Besides dormitories offer students make friends, also from other countries, students cannot find time to be alone. Whenever they feel themselves alone I am sure that there is a person to speak. For example when I started the university, I had some worry about adaptation to my new environment because I would share my room someone who I had never spoken but after I met her and other girls in the dormitory, anymore university life was not difficult to me. When I had a problem I asked for advice to my roommates or other students in dormitory.

On the other hand, to live in apartment gain people lots of new experience, which means the first step into real life. In contrary to live in dormitory, students do not have to stand other people or act together. Contrary to dormitories you do not have to eat same time and same canteen and so on. Living in apartments you can manage your time according to your desire. Furthermore, many things are in your responsibility like cooking, shopping, and paying the bills as well as all these things make you ready to real life. Furthermore dormitories rooms are generally tiny, besides, you have to share the room with another student and it is likely to lead to loose concentrate when you are studying.

Although both university housing and apartment have advantages, I prefer to live in an apartment where I feel myself more comfortable. Because I can pay attention to my lessons in my own room and prepare myself into the world.

Writing Feedback / learning from experience or learning from books - compare essay [2]

Hi! this is a TOEFL essay i wonder if you both correct and evaluate my essay please!
thanks in advance

In my opinion, learning from experience is the best way instead of learning from books for a couple of reasons.

First of all, it is a difficult part to perform, what you learned, in reality. Even it can be a trouble sometimes. For example I really wanted to get high score from TOEFL and I bought so many books which are in different level. I did not come across any difficulties by studying from book in reading and listening parts but when I started speaking and writing sections it became more complicated and I thought that I was not to be able to have the exam. After that I found a course, where I could have a chance to speak with native speakers, therefore, I overcame my speaking problem and for writing section I tried to write everyday and I achieved it.

Secondly, learning from experience gains people other experiences. You have chance to exparience new things as well. To cite an example, if you want to speak English and for this reason you want to go to England, you can also learn new things like meeting new people and recognizing new cultures. The way people think like that leads to many advantages in people life too.

Last but not at least, if you learn by experiencing, your knowledge can be more remaining. For example, my cousin and I started university at the same time and we graduated totally the same time as well. However, we have a difference between me and my cousin. When we were university she worked in summers while I was on holiday and now she remembers lots of details about our subject while I cannot.

To sum up, learning from experience is much better than learning from book. Because it is gained people new experience, taught people how to apply their knowledge to real life and makes people's knowledge always fresh.

Writing Feedback / computers have complicated people's life- agree disagree TOEFL essay [3]

I am waiting your helps please correct my essay!!

There is no doubt that computers are a revolution for human being. Although some people think that computers are complex and stressful, obviously, they have made our lives much easier since they involved our life. Moreover, I suppose that computers will become a necessity like food and water to the mankind.

First of all, computers change people's life in a way that we do not have to waste our time with data analyzing and calculating rather than downloading data to computer in order to make an analyze as well as it provides science to improve much faster. Besides, as it is well known, computer is useful not only in science but also in different areas like in banks. For example, computers are a link between banks and their costumers; they can keep all the information about costumers' account.

Secondly, knowledge of computer was difficult at its first time, but now, children are able to do their homework as well. Moreover, nowadays homeschooling and distant learning are regarded as a favorable tool for new generation. Therefore students and teachers cannot waste their time on the school way and the students are protected from epidemic diseases like swan flu which recently threaten most countries.

Finally, as computer is used for many areas, it is also used in keeping touch with people. For example last year I went to England to studying English and I wanted to speak with my friends and my family everyday. In order to telecommunication prices too high, I could get into touch with them on internet. Although I could not see them while we were speaking on mobile phone, we could see each other on internet. After I turned back Turkey, I could also keep in touch my friends from different countries.

As a result, computer makes people's life easier rather than complicating their lives. Anymore pople do their daily routines with computer, like paying the bills, communicating, and even studying. Furthermore, obviously, the more improvement computers show, the more computers continue to be used.