Undergraduate / "Sometimes the smallest thing..." - Commonapp Essay - Topic of your choice. [5]

Any criticism and suggestions would be greatly appreciated!!

"Sometimes the smallest thing..."

"That was magical!"
I looked up the sky as my teammates cheered for me, I felt rain drops hitting my body, but I was there enjoying the rain...

2 hours ago
I was somehow depressed by the signs of this upcoming thunderstorm because it reminded me of my heavy losses as a freshman. Although I had good tennis skills, but I often lost because I wasn't able to handle the pressure. I remember once I was defeated from wining 5-0 to losing 7-5. But as I walked onto the courts, I no longer feel the pressure, over the years I've learned how to handle the pressure and turn it into energy and motivation.

And the match started
I could feel the wind as I tossed the ball in the air; I could see myself 3 years ago as I lost my games. May be it's this feeling that I started to lose from 2-0 to 4-2.

"The game is 8" I told myself.
"What's happening? Don't let the weather affect you!" trying to boost myself.
But I failed, as the game continued, I felt drops of rains hitting my arms. The sky is getting darker and darker, the wind is blowing harder and harder, and I'm losing faster and faster.

In a blink of an eye, I'm already losing 2-6. I saw the coach and teammates of my opponent are already waiting for the game to end. At that moment something "small" happened. Their coach slowly approached to us and said, "You know what, this rain is going to pour out soon, usually it's first to 8 games, but now next game wins, so first to 7 games wins."

This is what I said, "Ok. Sure, no problem!"
This is what I told myself, "You can't do that, the game is 8. But you know what; you think your player is going to win? You think I can't come back from 2-6? I'm going to try my best to continue this game! You want go home? No, you stay here until I finish the game, and if it starts to rain, let it be! But never underestimate what one can do!"

20 minutes after
The wind was still blowing, his teammates were still waiting, but I was determined to win! I slowly started to "control" the game and as the "ratio" between my score and his started to slowly decreasing. For some reason, I felt the rain was waiting for me to win.

It's finally 6-6, and as the coach said, "next game wins." For the next 5 minutes, I felt the weather was working towards my favor; 15-0. 30-0, 40-0...And as I tossed the ball into the air for my last serve, I told myself, "imagine 3 years ago, you were losing 40-0." And I won. For a moment, I was in a state of calmness, but then come the excitement!

Imagine if the coach never intended to end the match early, I would have probably lost. But his words boosted me! We often ignore the "smallest" things, but sometimes the "smallest" thing can be the "greatest" thing! In fact, what's "small" and what's "great"?

On my way to home, the rain grew harder; I was enjoying myself in the rain. But far beyond the west, I saw a peak of sunlight!

Undergraduate / "That's the magic of Math!" - Common app [8]

"Oh I got it!" I jumped up as the fascination hit me.
That's the magic of Math!
Math first "hit" me when I was in elementary school in China where I was fascinated by the rules of multiplication and division. When I finally figured out "Why the result is less when multiplying an integer with a fraction," I told everybody my explanation (of course everybody laughed). It was like a magic that when I finally was able to reveal the "secrets," a sense of accomplishment and satisfaction rolls in.

When I came to the U.S, despite all difficulties of adapting to the new environment, the only language that spoke to me was math. Although my English was very limited, I tried to answer every math question to the best of my abilities. My classmates often laughed at me when I spoke in broken English trying to answer the questions. Gladly, my teacher - Mr. Reijen, recognized my passion. We spent hours discussing math tricks and the "magic" behind it.

"How you did it?" I asked him open mouthed.
"Because I'm a math-magician." he answered.
"I want to be a math-magician too!" I said enthusiastically.
At the same time, I was learning more maths from different Chinese text books that my cousins sent me. Sometimes my mom and I would "debate" for hours over one question until I finally "got it."

"No! You can't do that!" my mom yelled at me.
"Why is it wrong? Look! I did this..." I argued back.
When I asked my mom few days ago why were we so into math, she simply responded, "It's fun!"
As a sophomore in high school, I took AP Statistics and it changed my view in math. Math, from another perspective, it's more about interpretation rather than application. Instead of remember the formulas and theories, I tried to understand them. Interestingly, when sometimes I'm not thinking of anything, a "random" thought would come in and I would suddenly realize the answer (sometimes even in the middle of the night). The next day, I would tell everyone- I just wanted to share - share my happiness!

I felt even more accomplished when other students understood my explanation. Once I struggled to help an ESL student to understand the quadratic formula, and when she finally said "Oh! I got it," I knew math had enlightened her. When I showed students other ways to solve the same problem, I could feel they were experiencing the fascination of this magic!

Suddenly, it was not math anymore - it was the joy of sharing.
Now as a senior, although I no longer have any math courses, math continues to be everywhere. It's amazing how math can be so closely related to Physics and Chemistry, and how more people are becoming fascinated with this magic of math. And here I am helping students in calculus, hearing "Oh! I got it!"

Undergraduate / "Tennis - both physical and mental game" - Commonapp activities, 150 words essay! [2]

prompt : In the space provided below, elaborate on one of your activities (extracurricular, personal activities, or work experience) MAX 150 words. (Needs reduction!)

I first started playing tennis in the New York Junior Tennis League when I was in 8th grade. I was an ESL student - an immigrant. No one wanted to talk with me, I had no friends. However, ass my tennis skills improved, I gradually made more friends and gained more respects.I felt I was gradually blending itnto the American melting pot.

As a freshmen in high school, although I had good grades, again, I had no friends. Again, it was tennis that led me to meet my first friend after a conversation about the shool tennis team. In that year, I made to the school team and played as the 3rd singles, but my nerves often led me to lose most of my games. After intense mental struggle, by my sophmore year, I was able to overcome this nerve and fear. My phisolopy about tennis and life changed. Tennis was no longer a physical game, but more - a mental game. Your mental state of well-being is what ultimately will make a difference. Tennis led me to socially blend into the society and mentally being ready for my life.

189 words....NEED REDUCTION...PLEASE HELP!!!