Writing Feedback / IELTS - it's about media, advertisements and sales [2]

Hello~ here is my competition.I'm going to take the IELTS test,so..could you please help me to correct it.? I will appreciat it...and.my level is low.so...you know me~~

The topic is:Today,the high sales of popular consumer goods reflect the power of advertising and not the real needs of the society in which they are sold.To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays,advertisement,have been regarded as the main reason of high sales of goods,which means people purchasing the goods not to meet their demand,but was attracted by the advertisement.

I tend to believe that the influence by the advertisementare more or less.For example,the enterprise would ask some famous artists to show in the advertisement,otherwise,the fans would follow the idols they like and then buy the goods for real.Besides,using the benifit of price would be another way to attract the consumers to spend the money on the goods.Sometimes they sale at a discount and spread the news by advertising,the public may notic it when watching TV or listening to the radio.However,consumers may give the goods to others as gifts if they are necessary.Furthermore,the feature may be the most important aspect of a good,but the outlook would has a great deal of affective to the sale,people may buy the good as a decroation,if they do not need it.

Despite of these reasons,some smart consumers are exsist,they would think a lot and consider about the feature that the goods equiped,thus,to make a clever desicion.High sales of popular consume goods may be sold by its funtion as useful.

As a smart consumer, we should not purchase the commodity by the outlook or how fascinating the advertisement is.The price,the function should be considered as the primary elements to buy or not,and not treated by the advertisement,which can lead us to the goal by saving money and satisfy our requirement meanwhile.

Thank you very much~~~

Writing Feedback / 'Science deserves more attention' - IELTS Task2 [4]

These days people pay more attention to artists (writers, painters and so on) and give less importance to science and technology. Do you agree or disagree with this view?

Nowadays, art has drawn more attention than science did. For example, people concentrate on the scandals and gossip about artists, as a result, science and technology has been ignored by public.

Culture construction is important. Sometimes art can satisfy the mental for individual, which means some kinds of art can relax people from daily work, like listening to the music, watching movies, visiting the museum would be the good way to release people.

Besides, encouragement will be given to person to insist to their dream and make contribution to the world by telling some successful stories about artists.

However, the world may become a completely stagnant field due to too much public attention on art. Art can only meet the mental requirement, while the basic conditions could not be finished without science and technology.

Especially the modern technology, the primary driving force behinds the development of modern society, results in higher productivity and greater ease. Undeniable, modern technology revolution life in three main fields: work, transport and communication. Although modern technology is often blamed for stress and alienation, I doubt that many people would want to turn back the clock to the pre-technology age.

Science deserves more attention. Mass media should take the responsibility to cover the reports about science and technology instead of arts. On the national level, the government should fulfill its obligation in raising public awareness of the significance of science, and encourage more talent people throw themselves into this kind of fields and make contribution to the development of us human-beings.