dingpx
Jan 12, 2010
Undergraduate / 'Wearing school uniform' - Haverford College Supplement-Honor Code [5]
Sure, and here I am. I think your language level is much higher than mine, but every opinion worth taking, and I am happy to provide some.
TENSE
The middle school that I attended is strict both academically and socially. Every studentis was required to wear the school uniform during school time. Undoubtedly, the rule benefits ed students since uniforms can enhance team awareness and reduce comparison economically among students. Meanwhile, however, negative aspects of the stipulation annoy ied many students, including me.
I think your original tense have some meaning. Were you thinking about some thing we learned in school such as " the teacher told us that the earth moves around the sun" when writing this essay. Uh~I can't make sure which tense to use actually. But once decided, keep consistant.
In the elementary school, no one had forced me I was not forced to wear the school uniform, and the liberal environment there gave me ample room for self-expression through dress and manner. However, on the first day of middle school, the principal announced themust-wear-uniform something like "Only-Uniform" rule. The community standards discipline made me quite unhappy since it would be hard for prevent/restrict me to wear from wearing whatever clothes I want and to from better showing show my personality. my uniqueness, or sth like that.
Much out ofour my, who's we? expectation, no party neither side prevailed its opposite. Students were almost divided half by half concerning on the uniform policy issue.
In general, your essay is very on topic, clearly stated(except tense), and well focused. Uniform is a old topic but you do it innovatively. It's good to show that you first tried to change, which demonstrates sort of individulism and passion, ,and then you compromise for the opiniion of others, yeilding your quality to serve the majority and put your own interest aside.
Q上找你了。
Sure, and here I am. I think your language level is much higher than mine, but every opinion worth taking, and I am happy to provide some.
TENSE
The middle school that I attended is strict both academically and socially. Every student
I think your original tense have some meaning. Were you thinking about some thing we learned in school such as " the teacher told us that the earth moves around the sun" when writing this essay. Uh~I can't make sure which tense to use actually. But once decided, keep consistant.
In the elementary school, no one had forced me I was not forced to wear the school uniform, and the liberal environment there gave me ample room for self-expression through dress and manner. However, on the first day of middle school, the principal announced the
Much out of
In general, your essay is very on topic, clearly stated(except tense), and well focused. Uniform is a old topic but you do it innovatively. It's good to show that you first tried to change, which demonstrates sort of individulism and passion, ,and then you compromise for the opiniion of others, yeilding your quality to serve the majority and put your own interest aside.
Q上找你了。
