Writing Feedback / IELTS ESSAY PRACTICE: Computers replace human teachers. [3]

It's been a while since I posted some essays (and actually, wrote one). This is the very comeback! :D Although time doesn't cause any strain any more, I am not satisfied with my vocabulary and idea flow at all. Seem to me that all the vocabulary I have learnt grow rusty. Welcome all feedback!

Topic: Some people think that computers and the Internet are more important for a child's education than going to school. But others believe that schools and teachers are essential for children to learn effectively. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

With the number of technological advances growing apace, it is generally believed that Internet and computers will supplant the traditional role of teachers in a not too distant future. This idea may point out to two main directions, both of which present different arguments.

Central to the supporting arguments of this issue is the idea that the global online network is the inexhaustible source of information, which definitely exceeds the fund of knowledge that any veteran teacher can accumulate. Internet and computer also offer a more comprehensive access to knowledge, ranging from visual to aural stimuli, which make learning an ever enjoyable experience, especially for children.

On the other hand, critics of this idea maintain that although the educational benefits that the Internet may yield are undeniable, there still remain certain shortcomings. Much information as the Internet may provide, most of the sources are unjustified by experts. As a result, information from those sources is subject to question. Admittedly, the computer can show whether an answer to a particular question is right or wrong but it cannot give as an in-depth explanation as a human teacher can. Through face-to-face communication, teachers can also pinpoint the weaknesses of each student and therefore, adjusting and tailoring his or her teaching methodology to meet the levels or the demands of those students. This is where the computer proves to be incompetent.

In short, although both sides have their equally valid arguments, I am inclined to think that although Internet can be a useful tool for education, at no time will the unique role of human teachers be replaced.

Writing Feedback / IELTS TOPIC: Telecommuting ; GOOD OR BAD? [5]

Topic:"Telecommuting" refers to workers doing their jobs from home for part of each week and communicating with their offices using computer technology. Telecommuting is growing in many countries and is expected to be common for most office workers in the coming decades. What are some of the advantages and disadvantages of telecommuting? What is your opinion?

The global work field has seen a great deal of radical changes in recent years, among which telecommuting, or "teleworking", stands out as the most remarkable brainchild of this Technology Age. This essay will zero in on the pluses and minuses of this issue.

On the plus side, telecommuting opens a new horizon for working spouses who have to share the household commitments, such as: picking up their children, preparing meals, etc. Also, this idea holds much appeal to those who have to take care of elderly or disabled relatives. Teleworking will allow them to simultaneously fulfill their duties at home as well as at work. Moreover, due to the shift in work place, teleworkers will be liberated from commuting. A huge amount of time, therefore, will be saved. As a consequence, the productivity will improve as people can shun the long tedious hours spent on travelling. This also offers a wider range of choices for both companies and employers. Thanks to telecommuting, international cooperations may hold online conferences and establish cross-continental connection, which will be a big asset in the business world.

However, there are still some drawbacks lurking behind. First of all, if teleworking was widely applied, the practice would egg people on working on contract rather than for a fixed institution. Thus, teleworkers are more inclined to change jobs. Furthermore, as online workers are not frequently present at the offices, they stand less chance of promotion than their on-site counterparts. This daunting prospect may dampen their original passion and enthusiasm for their works. Besides, lack of face-to-face interaction between colleagues may imply the diminished effectiveness of working, which obviously poses a threat to the whole company's performance.

To recapitulate, I am in favor of the view that despite its remaining disadvantages, telecommuting will prove effective once adopted. . Hopefully, telecommuting will gain more popularity in the next few years.

(Word count: 312)

Looking forward to your comments :)

Writing Feedback / IELTS essay: Topic about dependence on computers [15]

Topic : We are becoming increasingly dependent on computers. They are used in businesses, hospitals, crime detection and even to fly planes. Is this dependence on computers a good thing or should we be more suspicious of their benefits?

In this computer-dominated world, just by a simple click, everything can be easily carried out. This idea, however, does not receive unanimous approval from global citizens. It is argued that computers will jeopardize the future of our modern world. This essay will focus on to what extent computers may affect our lives.

First of all, the advantages that computers yield are blindingly obvious. Nowadays, with a well-programmed computer, we can get things done with pinpoint accuracy. With the omnipresence of this technological product, for the years to come, there will be probably no news about "human errors" that hit the deadlines. Furthermore, there will be a significant reduction in human employment. A lot of time and energy would be saved if computers went into global application. Employers would be the first to benefit as the desired results are still achieved with the cost on human labor kept to the minimum.

On the other hand, there are still some imminent dangers. Too much dependence on computers envisages a vision in which the world will end up in catastrophe if one day, all the computers fail to fulfill human's demands. This discouraging prospect is quite likely especially now, when the Internet is so "densely populated". Research shows that by 2020, Internet will have been overloaded whereas its potential alternative still remains unknown. The expanding use of computers also accounts for the escalating rate of unemployment. The approaching consequence is predictable: the society will be suffocated by social crimes once redundant people grow more and more reckless.

To conclude, I contend that the issue of wide use of computers should receive a more considerate approach as the advantages that it brings about are far from laughable.

(Word count: 283)