Writing Feedback / TOEFL; Objective of attending school [4]

QUESTION; People attend school for many different reasons (for example, expanded knowledge, societal awareness, and enhanced interpersonal relationships). Why do you think people decide to go to school? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Schools are the institutions that operate with the motive of providing education to the students. Education generally means that acquiring knowledge, developing powers of reasoning and judgment and preparing a person intellectually for mature life. In my personal view, these are the main reasons why a person wishes to attend school. However, there are many other benefits that one can derive from, by attending school.

To begin with, the schools help one to acquire knowledge. In the first place, they employ teachers, who are specialists in particular subjects, to deliver the knowledge required by the students. The provision of assistance given by the teachers is one of the most attractive features in schools, that helps guide a student in the right path as he progress with acquiring knowledge. The teachers have the capability to arouse the student's interest in the subject and find solutions for his or her difficulties in the learning process. For example, I was never keen in learning science when I was in secondary level. However it was my new science teacher who made this subject interesting to me. He gave me his special attention to help improve my scores, which I finally manged to improve.

In addition, schools also build the environment for the students to develop their ability of reasoning and judgment. The facilities such as laboratories, libraries, auditoriums are meant to help students in this aspect. For example, a student may learn about the reason for a chemical reaction in the class room. However, he will be convinced about this theory only when he practically experiences it from the experiment conducted in the laboratory. The libraries too help students to broaden their perspectives on various subjects that help enhance their powers of reasoning and judgment. Finally, all these facilities together with the assistance of the teachers would help students to be intellectually matured and produce useful citizens to their societies.

More over, schools provide many other benefits as well, such as financial benefits, enhanced societal knowledge and useful networking opportunities. If one tries to obtain every thing that school provides outside the school, then it would be a very costly exercise. For example, in my country, the private tuition fees are very expensive and generally about five times more than the charges of schools. On the other hand, school is one of the best places for one to develop his or her societal knowledge and networking opportunities with others that would help this person immensely in his future endeavors. For example, it is one of my schoolmates who helped me to get my current job. And also I do not have any difficulty in interacting with people in my workplace who come from diverse backgrounds because I was exposed to such backgrounds during school days.

In my conclusion, I would like to assert that people attend school primarily for the purposes of acquiring knowledge, developing their powers of reasoning and judgment and becoming intellectually mature. However, a person would also be benefitted by financial savings, enhancement of societal awareness and networking opportunities even if they may not be the primary objectives of this person in making his or her decision to attend school.

Writing Feedback / trying new things or doing the same? [5]

Hi,
Please give me a feedback for the following;

QUESTION; Some people like to do only what they already do well. Other people prefer to try new things and take risks. Which do you prefer? Use specific reasons and examples to support your choice.

I would like to try new things as opposed to repeating the same old thing. Trying new things is no doubt would involve high risk. Despite this fact, however, I prefer to face new challenges rather than following a routine.

The main reason why I like to try new things is my character. I am, by nature, an adventurous person. My mother is used to say that she struggled hard to stop me climbing trees when I was small. In our culture, the girls do not engage in such boisterous activities. May be I displayed my character from my childhood itself.

The second reason is that I do not like to hinder my chances of progressing in life due to the fear of taking risks. There is a saying that "Higher the risks, higher the returns are". Therefore, I always look forward to grabbing an opportunity that would help me progress in life. This is why I left my previous employer; I worked for a bank in the capacity of a manager. My job was rather routine and also did not offer me any opportunity to progress further. The bank has a policy that one must complete four years in the same position to be eligible for the next promotion. I was too upset about this policy and felt it was wasting my time. Although I was paid a good salary, I left the bank and started my own business.

The third reason is that I am a hard working person. Therefore I do not like to idle time. I always want to engage in some activity which is a great motivation for me. Therefore, I do not really look forward to falling into a comfort zone. When I am doing my own business, I have hardly any time to relax. It is very challenging and spontaneous and keeps me motivated.

Therefore, for a person like me, it is very difficult to engage in routine tasks although they impose very little risks on you. I would always look forward to facing new challenges no matter how hard they are.

Writing Feedback / TOEFL;close friends vs casual friends [4]

Hi everybody,
I'm new to the forum.
Please help me to have a feedback on my essay which I did in 30 mins as to prepare for the TOEFL in two weeks.

QUESTION; It is better to have one or two close friends that to have a large number of casual acquaintances.

I strongly believe that it is better to have a few close friends than to have many casual acquaintances. I wish to reinforce my belief with the following reasons;

First and foremost, the close friends would stand by you when you are in trouble. For example, there is a saying, "A friend in need is a friend indeed". It emphasizes the meaning of a friendship; a friend is a person who would be with you in thick and thin. This is why casual acquaintances do not fit in with the definition of "friends". They are just people with whom you nod and say hi and bye. They would not develop strong mutual bonds with you that last life long. They would not stand by you when you are in trouble. Lord Buddha once preached that it is worthy to have one good friend who would not let you down when you need his/her help rather than having thousands of friends who would leave you when you are in trouble.

A close friend would always look forward to seeing your success. He or she would not hesitate to correct you when you try to fall into the wrong track because his/her purpose is to see you succeeding in life. For example, when I was in the second year in the university, I wanted to quit the university for a Job since I had some serious financial constraints. However it was my best friend who discouraged me and convinced me that this decision would hinder many future opportunities for me. He helped me a lot in my financial difficulties as well. Had it not been his advice and support, I would have not achieved most of my goal which I have accomplished today. Had he been just a casual friend, he would have not been so interested about my decision and kept quiet. Therefore it is your few good friends who would guide you through towards your success, not your casual friends.

Finally, you can trust your close friends since you know who they are. It is dangerous to trust people whom you do not know well. In casual acquaintances you do not know the real character of your casual friends because you have not made much effort to know them well. Therefore, it is dangerous for you to trust them and confide your personal things in them as they may some times betray you for their own interests.

These reasons have made me believe that close friendships are an asset for one's personal life. Therefore I conclude that it is better to have a few close friends rather than having many casual acquaintances.