Posts by mrscatoni

mrscatoni

Sep 11, 2011

Writing Feedback / IELTS: arranged marriage or not? Which system is better? [6]

please correct and give your impression.thank you

In some countries, marriages are arranged by the parents but in other cases, people choose their own marriage partner.
Discuss both systems.

In the contemporary era, most of the countries ancient traditions have face a significant revolution being replaced by modern rules and habits. However, old practises as the arranged marriage are still in use in some part of the world, whereas the choice of the life partner is the spouse priority in others. As everything, those options have pro and cons.

For example, the arranged marriage, namely either when parents or the whole family organise an union between two people who are not in love or even do not know each other, can be analysed from two points of view. As far as parents are concerned, it is an advantage, due to the common habit to celebrate the marriage to ameliorate their social status or share the wealth with others members of the community. As a consequence, the main aim for parents is to provide a theorical better life for their children. However, the couple has not choice, leading to an imposed life which is likely to not match personal likes and preferences. Moreover, this type of matrimony has nothing to do with love.

On the other hand, the modern and more widely accepted marriage is stipulated between two people who have fallen in love after a period of frequentation and possibly friendship. As a result, not only is the couple's choice to get married, but the relationship it is even more likely to last due to complicity and love which has been built over years. However, in this second option parents cannot help children with their experience and wisdom, being obliged to leave them free despite they might realize they are deciding wrongly.

In conclusion, as can be seen both marriages have advantages and drawbacks, although the arranged one suit more parents than the spouses. The opposite is often true for the other type of marriage.

mrscatoni

Sep 11, 2011

Writing Feedback / "taking a break before starting higher education is a good idea" - IELTS [5]

nowadays is too informal for IELTS, ( i have just discovered it!), use those days or ever better in the contemporary era.
good luck

mrscatoni

Sep 11, 2011

Writing Feedback / IELTS - QUALITIES A PERSON NEED TO BE SUCCESSFUL [2]

The qualities a person needs to become successful in today's world cannot be learned at a university or similar academic institution. To what extent do you agree or disagree？

In today's modern and competitive society, it is undeniable that we must equip ourselves with plenty of knowledge and skills in order to shine and to be successful in life. Many opine that the aforementioned aspects are mostly obtained through learning in academic institutions. I do agree towith that opinion to a certain degree. Nevertheless, I feel that one can also shine without even having to attend university .

First and foremost, it is certainly true that university education is of paramount importance for certain professions such as doctor, engineer and lawyer. Without proper training and knowledge, it would be impossible for them to perform their best in their careers. Not only that, when they are in a university, they will have the opportunity to share their knowledge as well as to network for business associates and partners. This can benefit them in future when they intend to open up their own companies or hospitals.

Looking from another perspective, there are also a significant number of people who are very successful in their fields without going to university. Take for instance those who start their own business. These people depend solely on hard work and luck. Interestingly, for some of them it proved to be a profitable job. To cite an example, Michael Dell who is the founder and the CEO of Dell left college atwhen he was 19 . Initially, he started his computer company in his college dorm room. Eventually, he used his earnings as well as his family's loan in order to progress to bebecome who he is now.

In addition, people with natural talents are also most likely to excel in their life. This is especially true in sectors like entertainment and sports. The introduction of increasing number of reality shows have made it possible for all those lucky ones to triumph. To illustrate this further, David Archuleta who was once a nobody has now taken up a large space in hearts of many. Hence, it is evident that individuals born with talents have also a high chance to be successful.

To wrap it all up, probably this is too informal for IELTS, it is indeed true that university education is pivotal in a person's life in order for one to prosper. However, it would be wrong to say that one's success completely depends on the education he or she receives at the institutions. Natural talent and hard work also contribute to their progress.

very well done essay.look like band 7.5-8

mrscatoni

Sep 11, 2011

Writing Feedback / World's economic status and lack of jobs - reasons for going to college or university [4]

Thank you to everybody. I just discover that even On conclusion is wrong...In conclusion is the right way.thank for the advice, very useful..two weeks to the test..!

mrscatoni

Sep 1, 2011

Writing Feedback / World's economic status and lack of jobs - reasons for going to college or university [4]

Business and Personal Reasons - IELTS< reasons for going to college or university

please review and if possible give me a band.thank you

Nowadays, the world's economic status and the way to find a job have completely changed. As a result, people are more likely to afford a college or university studies and they more often need it in order to proceed in a career. The reasons to attend those courses are various and can be divided based on personal or work purposes.

Regarding the personal aspect, I believe students often decide to dedicate few years of their life to ameliorate their knowledge. A good example of this approach can be found in those colleges which provide a large spectrum of subjects without focusing on a particular field. Subsequently those pupils would be able to proceed in more narrowed studies or simply benefit from their educational background for their daily life. By contrast, others would face their indecision with a university course which would give them the opportunity to meet new peers and to wide their horizons. Most of the time however, those students are funded by family and they certainly have not need to look for a job quickly.

On the other hand, I would say that the majority of Youngers that initiate university or college are pronating to improve their chance to start a career. In fact, those days the world of qualified work is competitive and high demanding. Therefore, preparation at a high level and standard is paramount. In other words, if a young pupil wants to become a doctor or an engineer, with all the benefits which can be gain in terms of wages, self-satisfaction and social status for instance, the only pathway to achieve it is through university.

On conclusion, although some students enrol higher education courses in seek of public relations, personal knowledge or for sabbatical years, in my opinion the most common reason is related to the better job opportunity they can achieve.

mrscatoni

Sep 1, 2011

Writing Feedback / TOEFL - "a chance of cooking" - food has become easier to prepare. [3]

In the past, one of the most controversy topic in each home was ~~what~~ which food should be made and who could be prepared.However , these days advanced technology helps humankind to cook their food easier and healthier. According to me, Frankly, it makes my life simple and helps me save time and money.

The First and foremost reason is that it saves our times so we can focus on our problems rather than preparing food. For example, in the past, preparing food was a big problem because finding and buying different food ingredients took a long time. Besides, finding a good recipe was very hard and a time-consuming task.

Furthermore, these days everyone can cook ~~food~~ . You can find plenty of chain stores in your neighborhood so you can go there and buy precooked food. Then, you go home and cook them in less than 15 minutes. For example my father told me when he was young it was very hard for him to cook lunch, but now he can easily cook delicious food.

Last but not least, preparing food costs has gone down. For instance, if you want to cooke a pizza you can buy a precooked pizza one . After that, you put it in the oven for 15 minutes. Then, it is ready, so you have saved energy such as gas and electricity. Therefore you pay less for those bills.

To sum up, focus on our business, giving everybody a chance of cooking a good quality food, and cutting the costs are only three advantages of this fact.

Try to not repeat the same words and ideas too much. food and cook are used several times in the essay.

mrscatoni

Aug 27, 2011

Writing Feedback / ielts:people often decide to work for a time before they start their university [2]

please review and if possible give me an estimate band.thank you very much

in some countries, young people often decide to work or travel for a time before they start their university studies. discuss the advantages and disadvantages of doing this.

Any pupil around the world know perfectly well the sensation of achievement which can be experienced after completion of the high school and the simultaneous anxiety at the idea of starting another course of study at the university. Many students cope with this through a period of time dedicated to discover the world and to live new exciting experience in the so called "gap year". There is little agreement about whether a year away from the daily responsibilities would benefit the person which undertakes it or however it would be a waste of time.

Supporters of the former opinion claim that during the gap, students are able to gain experience which would never be accessible later in life when family, work and duties will be paramount. In addiction many youngsters work to pay their expenses before starting the university therefore this will increase their chance to obtain a good job afterwards, thanks to the skills they have learned and the curriculum they have been able to ameliorate. Lastly, a break from the routine studies would probably rest the mind and the friends who students can meet during their trip will restore an ideal condition to be ready for the university commitment, which is the real aim.

In contrast, other people claim that gap year, or even shorter period of time, is just an excuse for lazy students to take a break and it can lead to a shameful waste of time and opportunity. Moreover, some months without obligations are dangerous for those students who are not fully convinced of further education. In other words, if the time spend away from books and lessons is too enjoyable some students would be persuaded to change carrier. In addition, travel can be expensive and therefore increase the debt that undergraduates will have at the end of their studies.

In conclusion, it is clear that dedicate a period to personal achievement is very popular among youngsters especially in the developed countries, however they must be aware of the inevitable consequences of their decision.