sherxon
Apr 19, 2012
sherxon
Apr 19, 2012
Letters / 'my economic and quantitative profile' - Motivation letter for Master of Economics [2]
I am writing to apply for entrance in the Master of Science in Economics at xx university,
starting in the winter of 2012. I am an undergraduate student in the Department of Economics of the University of Bologna - Alma Mater Studiorum, from where I am expected to graduate in July 2011. I wish to continue my studies and pursue a Master's degree in Economics.
My aim is to work as an economic analyst in an international economic field. In fact, I am passionate about economics and global economy, which are most challenging to me. Therefore, I would like to gain a deeper theoretical knowledge and practical skills to evaluate the market. My core interest lies in labor markets, industrial organization and growth theories. Since I began to study economics, I have realized that this field represents for me a powerful tool to better understand the connection between markets and to investigate the reasons why some economies are thriving whereas others are in recession. I believe that these issues are more relevant than ever, given the current economic trend triggered by the financial crisis. I am strongly convinced that further professional education at xx university would enable me to reach my goals and give me the needed knowledge. I am really interested in this Master program because it provides several quality courses and outstanding seminars on these matters, together with a motivating and challenging environment.
During the last six summers spent working as beach attendant and five months as steward in a fair I developed my social skills and learned how to deal in unfamiliar situations interact with customers. The semester that I studied in Cracow, through the Erasmus Exchange Programme and afterwards being on the Board of "Erasmus Student Network" in Rimini, refined my capacity of integration and communication skills in a multicultural environment. Alongside my academic background, I had the opportunity to join a course of memory strategies held by a man considered to have one the best memory in the world. This helped me to improve further my learning methods and to optimize the study time.
I am confident that my economic and quantitative profile as well as some analytical tools that I acquired during a three months internship as assistant of a chartered accountant will be important assets for my realization in this field. Moreover, appropriate study environment in Mannheim and influence of German economy will also be very positive for my study.
Thank you for your time and consideration.
do not take my corrections wrong way!!! i did what i can. i think u had better pay deep attention to requirement. this very important.
I am writing to apply for entrance in the Master of Science in Economics at xx university,
starting in the winter of 2012. I am an undergraduate student in the Department of Economics of the University of Bologna - Alma Mater Studiorum, from where I am expected to graduate in July 2011. I wish to continue my studies and pursue a Master's degree in Economics.
My aim is to work as an economic analyst in an international economic field. In fact, I am passionate about economics and global economy, which are most challenging to me. Therefore, I would like to gain a deeper theoretical knowledge and practical skills to evaluate the market. My core interest lies in labor markets, industrial organization and growth theories. Since I began to study economics, I have realized that this field represents for me a powerful tool to better understand the connection between markets and to investigate the reasons why some economies are thriving whereas others are in recession. I believe that these issues are more relevant than ever, given the current economic trend triggered by the financial crisis. I am strongly convinced that further professional education at xx university would enable me to reach my goals and give me the needed knowledge. I am really interested in this Master program because it provides several quality courses and outstanding seminars on these matters, together with a motivating and challenging environment.
During the last six summers spent working as beach attendant and five months as steward in a fair I developed my social skills and learned how to deal in unfamiliar situations interact with customers. The semester that I studied in Cracow, through the Erasmus Exchange Programme and afterwards being on the Board of "Erasmus Student Network" in Rimini, refined my capacity of integration and communication skills in a multicultural environment. Alongside my academic background, I had the opportunity to join a course of memory strategies held by a man considered to have one the best memory in the world. This helped me to improve further my learning methods and to optimize the study time.
I am confident that my economic and quantitative profile as well as some analytical tools that I acquired during a three months internship as assistant of a chartered accountant will be important assets for my realization in this field. Moreover, appropriate study environment in Mannheim and influence of German economy will also be very positive for my study.
Thank you for your time and consideration.
do not take my corrections wrong way!!! i did what i can. i think u had better pay deep attention to requirement. this very important.
sherxon
Apr 19, 2012
sherxon
Apr 18, 2012
Writing Feedback / TOEFL essay: Times are changing - is progress always good? [4]
Hi! jen4enka
i meant that u need put , after thereby
and second as is known is informal
as it known is formal
besides u should create beautiful appearance with ur essay. while paragraphing there should be a blank line! do not use question sentences. instead u can write ''whether progress is always of advantage sparks a heated debate among people. As of me. progress is...
in this way u can continue
if u need any help, feel free
Hi! jen4enka
i meant that u need put , after thereby
and second as is known is informal
as it known is formal
besides u should create beautiful appearance with ur essay. while paragraphing there should be a blank line! do not use question sentences. instead u can write ''whether progress is always of advantage sparks a heated debate among people. As of me. progress is...
in this way u can continue
if u need any help, feel free
sherxon
Apr 18, 2012
Scholarship / 'my construction background' - Sop to apply scholarship [2]
try to write in a professional way! do not write ur name. they know ur name from ur application
and then
try to write in a professional way! do not write ur name. they know ur name from ur application
and then
sherxon
Apr 18, 2012
Writing Feedback / ('my strong curiosity in computer..') - pragraph more beautiful and functional? [4]
please can u make it more functional? thank u in advance!!
I am applying for admission to the Bachelor Degree program in Information Technology (IT) for further advanced education to achieve my goals. I believe that my ambitions in computer science will contribute to expansion of software industry, development of wireless network access and information appliances. Indeed, I am more interested in the manner, in which huge INTERNET security problems are uncovered and fixed, and the possible ways that people in rural areas can have wide wireless internet access. Besides, we know that the latest paraphernalia features a long list of technological innovations: electronic chips, movement sensors and biometric recognition. So, I would also like to learn how exactly these devices that can monitor our smallest deeds and gestures work. In order to gain an appreciation of these and related issues, it is essential for me to have strong grounding in IT.
please can u make it more functional? thank u in advance!!
I am applying for admission to the Bachelor Degree program in Information Technology (IT) for further advanced education to achieve my goals. I believe that my ambitions in computer science will contribute to expansion of software industry, development of wireless network access and information appliances. Indeed, I am more interested in the manner, in which huge INTERNET security problems are uncovered and fixed, and the possible ways that people in rural areas can have wide wireless internet access. Besides, we know that the latest paraphernalia features a long list of technological innovations: electronic chips, movement sensors and biometric recognition. So, I would also like to learn how exactly these devices that can monitor our smallest deeds and gestures work. In order to gain an appreciation of these and related issues, it is essential for me to have strong grounding in IT.
sherxon
Apr 18, 2012
Writing Feedback / TOEFL essay: Times are changing - is progress always good? [4]
some cohesive mistakes: 1) thereby,
2) as it is known, 20th century...
try to write in a professional way! instead of saying this ''Secondly, progress causes that we more often interfere with the nature and I think our influence is not good''
u had better, in my opinion, write; progress is causing human interference with the nature to increase, which has some, i think, negative aspects in all fields of life. for example...
some cohesive mistakes: 1) thereby,
2) as it is known, 20th century...
try to write in a professional way! instead of saying this ''Secondly, progress causes that we more often interfere with the nature and I think our influence is not good''
u had better, in my opinion, write; progress is causing human interference with the nature to increase, which has some, i think, negative aspects in all fields of life. for example...
sherxon
Apr 3, 2012
Undergraduate / 'Essay about Unicorns; Greed still rules the human race' - U of M Honors [7]
you should read Harry Potter. then, you even can see another aspect of unicorns; how they were treated and killed
you should read Harry Potter. then, you even can see another aspect of unicorns; how they were treated and killed
sherxon
Apr 3, 2012
Undergraduate / "I am shy" - 500 word Personal essay - starting points? [5]
i believe that your shyness is great thing. i really appreciate it. i think should write what u have and who u r . even essay checkers will like honest and open essays
i believe that your shyness is great thing. i really appreciate it. i think should write what u have and who u r . even essay checkers will like honest and open essays
sherxon
Apr 3, 2012
Writing Feedback / ('my strong curiosity in computer..') - pragraph more beautiful and functional? [4]
Later, my strong curiosity in computer and its attractive "world" was caused a leisure activity to become my lifelong ambition by one of my teachers at the school. As a teacher, Mr. Farxod took me into the real world of computers: showed me the power and the major role of computers in all fields of life.
Later, my strong curiosity in computer and its attractive "world" was caused a leisure activity to become my lifelong ambition by one of my teachers at the school. As a teacher, Mr. Farxod took me into the real world of computers: showed me the power and the major role of computers in all fields of life.
sherxon
Apr 3, 2012
Undergraduate / 'medical care for the underprivileged' - UC Davis [4]
1)to study abroad
2)while the biological science pr ... are ..., BUSP is excellent
1)to study abroad
2)while the biological science pr ... are ..., BUSP is excellent
sherxon
Apr 3, 2012
Undergraduate / 'a software specialist' - Why did I choose my university and Goal of my study [3]
In my opinion, it would be better if it is like that:
The program's curriculum is outstanding, as consists of a wide range of courses for students Furthermore, through several discussions in the [University Name], the atmosphere is friendly with many opportunities such as financial packages, and sport teams. One of my lifelong ambitions is to work in high-tech companies in the [Country Name]. My further education as well as past experience, I believe, will enable my wish to come true
In my opinion, it would be better if it is like that:
The program's curriculum is outstanding, as consists of a wide range of courses for students Furthermore, through several discussions in the [University Name], the atmosphere is friendly with many opportunities such as financial packages, and sport teams. One of my lifelong ambitions is to work in high-tech companies in the [Country Name]. My further education as well as past experience, I believe, will enable my wish to come true
