Undergraduate / My mother's Accident (My Growth Process) [4]

It's the common app personal statement. Please make sure that word order is logical, and that the metaphors makes sense. Also, I'm not sure if I addressed enough how I grew as a person. Suggestions please?

I have built a protective barrier around me. I realized that now. Instead of letting others in, their hopes, dreams and problems became mine, and together we would tackle the hardships life brought. It was easy that way.

After building myself up from a heap of other people's thoughts and dreams, how shocking it was to emerge into the stark fluorescent light of a hospital, and discover I had no self. My journey into this room was my first disembarking. I entered the hospital in panic, cold and lost, frantically trying to disappear beneath the harsh glare of the lights. Huddled before the double doors marked "emergency room" I examined myself and found that I was empty. Finally, prompted by a nudge from my sister, I entered the room.

It was strange to see my mother lying there so helplessly. Her skin was paler than usual and glistened in the darkened corridors of her enclosed room. I tested the truth of the situation by gently placing my hand against hers. It was soft and clammy, and yet I was sure one false move could cause it to shatter.

It was then that the barriers that surrounded me were tested. One by one, they were stripped away like the peels of an orange, exposing the 17 years of self that I had successfully tried to bury until this moment. I now faced a situation that threatened to shatter the emotional bond between me and mother.

Two months passed by and little progress was made. She had suffered serious brain damage and the doctors were unsure of her outcome. My grades plummeted and my social life declined. I was shutting down and my state became horrific. My friends desperately tried to revitalize the once enthusiastic kid they had known but their plans faltered and my emotional fragility increased.

It was not until I looked at myself in the mirror one morning that the real journey began. The person before my eyes was a wasted heap of empty thoughts. I had betrayed myself and my mother, and I knew I had to replenish my own willpower and begin to believe in my mother's strength and continue living.

Where did this willpower come from? Having realized life is fragile I began to understand that I have and will continue to face challenges throughout my life, yet I cannot let them impact me negatively. Life is a process of becoming, a combination of states we have to go through. Where people fail is that they wish to elect a state and remain in it. Though I will go through difficult times, I must work my way through them and think of them more as s growth process then a pruning of my strength.

She stayed there for four more months, waking only for seconds before falling back into a deep sleep that threatened to envelope her forever but I believed in her awakening to be the mother I once new. I began to visit her almost every day after school. I would take a cab to assure I got there before visiting hours ended and I began a journal, my entries ranging from my thoughts of the school day, to the strength I knew she possessed. I knew that one day she would look back upon it and be surprised by my gained maturity. I became me again. My grades began to improve and my friends were glad that I once again became engaged in my extracurricular activities.

More than my other achievements in life, I am proud of this one. The drunk driver that led to this devastating accident was absolutely out of my control, yet my ability to stay strong and believe in my mother was not. She eventually got better. Though she will never be the same I am grateful for her recovery. The world is full of harmony and I am grateful I have become a part of it.

Undergraduate / Why Northwestern Essay (with the content) [5]

What are the unique qualities of Northwestern - and of the specific undergraduate school to which you are applying - that make you want to attend the University? In what ways do you hope to take advantage of the qualities you have identified?

I need help with the content. Am I answering all of the questions? If so, am I answering them in enough details?

When I was little, I used to pretend Northwestern was a Castle. Its sprawling arches, gothic buildings, and rich stained glass became my defense tower from the evil that lurked beyond its gates. My sense of imagination was the only entertainment I had during the hour long trips my mom would take to The Block Museum as an art buff.

As I grew older I began to see Northwestern for what it really was - a highly rigorous school of academic excellence, and although my mother's visits to the campus became less frequent, they were replaced by my sister's visits as a graduate student obtaining a MA in English. She would take me along as she picked up books for research papers at the Northwestern University Library and we would converse about the universities unique qualities. It was then that I realized I, much like my sister, possessed many of the qualities Northwestern sought from its students - high levels of leadership ability, athleticism, and participation in organizations that benefited my community.

I have also conducted a meticulous search for the college that best suits my educational goals and I have no doubt that Northwestern's top notch faculty and small-sized classes will provide me with the best quality of education. During both my junior and senior year I had the opportunity to spend a few nights on campus with a friend. Through this experience I grew to love not only the campus, but the welcoming students and staff. Yet, I am primarily attracted to the universities philosophy of not just providing its students with information, but teaching them how to think. Northwestern's core curriculum will provide me with a solid foundation of knowledge to effectively communicate with my peers and professors. I embrace the challenges of a vigorous curriculum that will continue to stimulate my abilities as a student.

After attending a seminar at the university on its prestigious Engineering Program, I hope to take full advantage of the McCormick School of Engineering and Applied Sciences by majoring in Mechanical Engineering. I look forward to an academic environment that blurs the distinction between science and engineering and the new Engineering First Program that will allow me to learn problem solving, design, and communications during my first years of study. Furthermore, I hope having access to the college will allow me to divulge myself in undergraduate research and labs to link my knowledge to more practical, real world, applications. I have already begun taking steps to achieve my goal of becoming a mechanical engineer by interning at my uncles product design firm during spring break my junior year.

To continue my passion for community service, I hope to venture beyond the universities gates to the cities of Evanston and Chicago. As a member of Key Club, a community service organization, since my freshman year of high school, helping others is a major commitment that I hope to continue through my college years and for the rest of my life. Northwestern's Center for Student Involvement will provide me with a wide array of volunteer opportunities in the city's walls.

Northwestern constantly challenges its students and provides countless opportunities for something new, breaking people out of their comfort zones and providing an environment in which students thrive. I crave the opportunity to enroll into Northwestern University's Mechanical Engineering Program and create my own memories of the school as I strive to my full potential and make avid use of the resources available to me.

Undergraduate / U of I (Academic goals relate to professional goals) [4]

Essay 1: In an essay of 300 words or less, write about how your personal or academic interests relate to your intellectual or professional goals.

A problem solver since infancy, economics became a natural area of interest for me. This passion of mine led me to enroll in the Elements of Entrepreneurship Course through the University of Chicago's Collegiate Scholar's Program the summer after my sophomore year. After being taught the basic principles of economics and business we were placed into groups and asked to create a business model. We would later present our business in a competition to several members of Goldman Sachs and place third.

The course triggered my desire to understand how the world around me functioned. It provoked my interest in economics and I realized it was a passion I possessed for many years. However, it was not until I took this course that I was able to classify this interest into a profession.

I continued learning how the world around me worked by focusing on why we make specific decisions. I studied this by taking Advanced Placement Microeconomics. At the conclusion of the course, we were placed into groups and asked to create a product and use economic principles to convince a group of judges that our product would become a niche in the market. We ranked in the top three groups out of 45.

I continued researching how the market responds to new products by taking Innovation Incubator both my junior and senior year. It was also during this time that I enrolled into the Illinois Virtual High School to continue my study of economics by taking Advanced Placement Macroeconomics because it was not offered at my school. The course allowed me to examine our economy on a national level. I now hope to continue my study of economics at the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champagne at the College of Liberal Arts and Sciences.