Undergraduate / 'In Bangladesh...' UofM Essay#1 Everyone belongs to many different communities... [4]

Plz tell me what you think.I think i am a little over 250 words(around 269).Be harsh if need be :)

In Bangladesh, people share common beliefs, culture and of course religion.Posing as much an influence on people as the culture itself, religion seems to be the glue that adheres Bangladeshis together as a united nation.The majority are Muslims with Christians,Buddhists and Hindus following suit.

One of the many facets that sets Bangladesh apart from other countries is its unprejudiced demeanor towards both Muslims and non-Muslims.There is no religious extremism.There are people of all classes and beliefs in Bangladesh.There are the poor struggling on one side and the rich lavishing on the other.But this seems to matter little when they, albeit the number of zeroes on their bank accounts, come togther for friday prayers as they stand, shoulder to shoulder, and pray together.As they pray together in synchroneity, it would be hard for a spectator to differentiate, but he can definitely deduce that this is one nation,the inhabitants of which calling each other brothers and systers as they pray for the better of the world and the nation as a whole, is as united as it claims to be.

With the advent of the religious festivals, for instance, Eids and Christmas, come the infectious reactions of the people.Every now and then, I find myself indulging in them as I cherish my place in this community.As everyone starts preparing for the festivals, the air acquires a different tone; florist shops, confectionaries, grocery stores all decorate and remind us over and over again that regardless of the troubles we face or the hardships that await, that circled date on our calendars is the day we are allowed to live the way we want.

Undergraduate / 'I had failed the math section' Experiencing a failure. How did it affect you? CommonApp [2]

This is the new Commonapp option#2 essay for Uni of Michigan Ann Arbor:

Please help me improve my essay.Be rude and harsh if necessary.I am yet uncertain about what title to use so i am using this:

Studying class 3 mathematics!

I was waiting in the principle's office.I sat there nonchalantly with this chesty attitude i still find hard to believe it existed in me.I was not worried about the admission test that lay ahead which would determine my eligibility as a class 9 freshman.The principle himself escorted me to the room where I'd sit for the test, and handed me the paper.It seemed like a regular exam;starting with an English essay and ending with mathematics.The essay topic was somewhat surprising:'Describe and talk about your future plans'.I completed the essay with whatever limited vocabulary i had and whatever idiomatic expressions i knew.When i moved on to the Maths sections, i was not surprised to discover that it contained only basic algebra and rudimentary geometry.What was frustrating and, to a similar extent,impedimentary was the fact that i had no idea how to work them out!.I had no math knowledge whatsoever.The principle told me and my parents that I'd be accepted only under one condition;that i'd work really hard.I had failed the math section,utterly.

The days that followed were all about life's regular pitfalls and plateaus.I started a class with 20-some students.The first period was the old, familiar mathematics.Only this time it was the not-so-familiar Pure mathematics! My colossal struggle started thereafter.Each subject i met comprised of foreign and abstract concepts.As i progressed i got progressively worse in literally every subject.Whatever knowledge i had needed revisiting, and whatever idiosyncrasies i had were thrown out the window.

During the half-yearly exams i got a G in pure maths and a U(unclassified) in General math.Going up against my peers was a lost cause.It was like sitting idle between two speeding trains; I could see my peers waving goodbye all around me as i stood impotently doing nothing.Failure was scoring against success in an open soccer field as success watched from the gallery.Was it possible for a comeback of some sort?Was the ability to turn the tables inside me?

I started with mathematics with a home tutor who had one of the biggest influences on my life.I worked day in and day out.As weird as it sounds,though not exactly embarrassing, I started with class 3 mathematics! I believed if i had to improve i had to start from scratch.I started noticing tiny specks of light at the end of the tunnel for the first time since starting high school.No later than six months, I secured an A* in general math and an A in pure math proceeding on to secure the same grades in the same subjects respectively in IGCSE the following year.It was time to come back with flying colors and show the world that i wasn't just another ordinary pebble in a beach.I became obsessed with mathematics and physics.Later down the road i started reading Uni-level books for challenge-something that excited me.

Today, i am a different person.The failure that i faced at the begining of this journey was encouraging and inspiring.It taught me that those downs in life are for a reason and that turning those downs into ups is what life is all about, that no destination is too far if objectives are clear and that each passing day that you think about it is one day closer to your goal.You just need the right thing to propel you onwards.In my case, it was the failure i set out with.

Undergraduate / One day I was juggling a tennis ball [2]

UC Prompt#2:Tell us about a personal quality, talent, accomplishment, contribution or experience that is important to you. What about this quality or accomplishment makes you proud and how does it relate to the person you are?

One of the many things that i am grateful to have been gifted with is curiosity.I would question any and everything and unless i got a satisfactory answer,which was very rare,I wouldn't rest.I started this epoch of curiosity by asking "How far does the bay of bengal stretch?".Answers like 'Its the end'...'There's nothing beyond the oceans' were common.But i was told about Earth being spherical so ocean stretching to infinity was unsettling.Then my focus drifted towards the stars.Celestial bodies seized my interest;I started studying astronomy.I became fascinated and undoubtedly, my curiosity caught blackholes and supernovae.

I was curious about how a vending machine worked so when i was about 13 i made a mechanical,miniature vending machine all by myself.I mentally rendered the mechanism and it worked.A coin of sufficient mass would go into the slot and a chocolate bar would wind up on a receptacle at the bottom.From the outside it looked like a mere box but when peeked inside a lot was going on.There were two planks pivoted in the middle and one end of the smaller was on top of the larger one while the other end had the chocolate bars.The coin would fall on the larger plank making it rotate about the pivot.Since both planks were connected,tilting one would tilt the other.I had applied principle of moments without even realizing it.

One day I was juggling a tennis ball as i rode my bicycle.I suddenly realized that since the ball went up,since i was riding forward,the ball should fall somewhere behind me(exactly where i flung it from),instead,even being in air,it moved with me and the bicycle.I eventually tried this in a moving car.When i deliberately threw it up right in front of my face i expected the ball to hit me since the ball moved up as the car moved forward;it didnt.I was discombobulated by that.Only much later when i studied relative motion did i understand that phenomenon.

I was curious about how mathematical formulae worked so I started researching about them.When i couldn't figure out a problem I'd get curious and spend the whole day figuring it out .Curiosity taught me maths!

Is it good enough?

Please check my grammer,punctuation and structure.

Undergraduate / "A dream too far"-UC Application prompt#1 Essay on my life and surroundings [5]

Utopia?No.But growing up in Bangladesh was not all tough nor was living in a middle-class family as one might guess.The country has had some financial issues alright but calling it impoverished would be a gross underestimation.I grew up in a place where both sides of the picture could be experienced;both prodigality and poverty.Opportunities were limited,if not deucedly restricted.We were in-between.I grew up with one brother and one sister.We lived adjacent to our paternal grandmother and grandfather. Whatever i say about my grandpa and grandma would be less and quite honestly, my vocabulary is altogether too limited to describe exactly how benevolent they were.I was pretty reticent and never had too many friends.I'd go to my grandpa's literally everyday after school.He was a best friend i eventually grew up not having,for he passed away when i was 10.He died of lung cancer.My grandma started becoming my next best friend.

Raising 3 kids and ensuring they obtained education was strenuous in a country like Bangladesh;overpopulated and without opportunity.But my parents ensured we never felt belittled.As far back as i can remember,my uncle was my first companion when i was no older than 3 or 4.He is truly a role model.I've learnt time and again that no matter how far your destination, each passing day that you think about it is one day closer to your goal.Regardless of the number of red cirlces on my report cards i was never treated differently.I participated in every type of sports at school and i was always good at that.It was much later,however,ere high school, that my report cards started seeing less red and more praise.

I was always interested in the mechanisms.I would always try and explain how something worked by mere observation.It was not about how beautiful it looked or the wonders it could perform,it was about what was going on on the inside that seized my attention.Since i didn't have much knowledge about electrical circuits.Purely mechanical things like primitive pulleys and levers were always a fascination.In my country,we believe in fixing things rather than buying.Somehow i could fix anything ranging from water systems to computers.Thus i became interested in computers as well.I study in the living room amid chaos because i don't have a room of my own.But this does not hold me, rather it spurs me onward.

When i was about 12 i made a mechanical,miniature vending machine all by myself.I mentally rendered the mechanism and it worked.A coin of sufficient mass would go into the slot and a chocolate bar would wind up on a receptacle.From the outside it looked like a mere box but when peeked inside a lot was going on.There were two planks pivoted in the middle and one end of the smaller was on top of the larger one while the other end had the chocolate bars.The coin would fall on the larger plank making it rotate about the pivot.Since both planks were connected,tilting one would tilt the other,and the bar would fall towards the receptacle.I had applied principle of moments without even realizing it.

The role played by my current school in bringing me up to who i am today is immense.When i first applied for 9th grade I performed extremely bad in the entrance exam and almost got rejected.The principle took me in on a condition that I'd work really hard.6 months after i applied i got 'G' in Pure maths and 'U'(unclassified)in Maths B.Later down the road,I worked hard with sheer determination.No later than 4 months after that i secure 'A' in pure maths and 'A*' in maths B.It was class 9 however,that helped my amorphous dreams acquire a shape.I became fascinated with science and math.I started reading college level books i.e advanced calculus and physics;books that were way beyond the curricula.As a result i eventually acquired the tools required to explain everyday phenomenon including electrical circuits.

I am open to challenges and i can adapt to any situation.I strain myself in hopes that my ambitions won't be a dream too far.

Is it enough?I need you to correct any grammatical or punctuation errors.Also tell me if any of the info i entered seem redundant or unnecessary.I am open to harsh criticisms :)

Thank you.