boston1002
Oct 5, 2014
Writing Feedback / Our rights as people define who we are as individuals - SAT ESSAY; CENSORSHIP [2]
Please look for grammar errors and comment on how I can make my essay stronger :) I had 25 minutes to write this practice SAT essay and I am typing it exactly as I wrote it.
Assignment: Can censorship limit people's rights?
Our rights as people define who are we are as individuals. Our individual rights in society allow us to express our ideas and thoughts. We have the ability to say we do not agree with the President or do not support a new law. The 1st Amendment was put into place to allow us to speak for ourselves. So, the question, "Can censorship limit people's rights?" is true. We as people have lived our lives with rights that we have earned. For example, before the American Revolution colonists were censored by the British Parliament and King which led them to revolve. Also, in China the government controls their people which limits their rights.
To begin with, colonists were ruled by Britain's Parliament and King and were revoked of their rights. The British censored the colonists by putting laws on everything they did. For example, colonists were undeniably taken away the land that they earned during the French and Indian War. Also, they were taxed without representation. Colonists were not allowed to have a say in anything that was happening to them. The people of the 13 colonies were unrightfully tricked by the British. This censorship led the colonists to rebel. This led to the American Revolution and other life changing documents such as the Declaration of Independence and Bill of Rights. Censorship limited their rights and taught the colonists to rebel for the rights they deserved.
Furthermore, Chinese citizens have their lives controlled by the government in present day China. China tells their citizens the number of children they can have, the websites they can go on, the books they can read, and many other things. Chinese citizens have their lives controlled by the government and cannot fully express their rights as individuals. It is truly a shame that we as humans cannot be able to think for ourselves because of ourselves. We try to revoke our own rights for the better good of our world, but in the end we are harming more then we are helping ourselves.
Without doubt the action of censorship within our world will not be stopped. People will continue to limit the rights of others for their own selfish reasons. The colonists oppressed their censorship while the Chinese have yet to do so. It is sad that the world has come to a point where individuals are told how many children they can because of censorship by their own government. Only time will tell whether our world will give the rights to the people that deserved them in the right place.
Please look for grammar errors and comment on how I can make my essay stronger :) I had 25 minutes to write this practice SAT essay and I am typing it exactly as I wrote it.
Assignment: Can censorship limit people's rights?
Our rights as people define who are we are as individuals. Our individual rights in society allow us to express our ideas and thoughts. We have the ability to say we do not agree with the President or do not support a new law. The 1st Amendment was put into place to allow us to speak for ourselves. So, the question, "Can censorship limit people's rights?" is true. We as people have lived our lives with rights that we have earned. For example, before the American Revolution colonists were censored by the British Parliament and King which led them to revolve. Also, in China the government controls their people which limits their rights.
To begin with, colonists were ruled by Britain's Parliament and King and were revoked of their rights. The British censored the colonists by putting laws on everything they did. For example, colonists were undeniably taken away the land that they earned during the French and Indian War. Also, they were taxed without representation. Colonists were not allowed to have a say in anything that was happening to them. The people of the 13 colonies were unrightfully tricked by the British. This censorship led the colonists to rebel. This led to the American Revolution and other life changing documents such as the Declaration of Independence and Bill of Rights. Censorship limited their rights and taught the colonists to rebel for the rights they deserved.
Furthermore, Chinese citizens have their lives controlled by the government in present day China. China tells their citizens the number of children they can have, the websites they can go on, the books they can read, and many other things. Chinese citizens have their lives controlled by the government and cannot fully express their rights as individuals. It is truly a shame that we as humans cannot be able to think for ourselves because of ourselves. We try to revoke our own rights for the better good of our world, but in the end we are harming more then we are helping ourselves.
Without doubt the action of censorship within our world will not be stopped. People will continue to limit the rights of others for their own selfish reasons. The colonists oppressed their censorship while the Chinese have yet to do so. It is sad that the world has come to a point where individuals are told how many children they can because of censorship by their own government. Only time will tell whether our world will give the rights to the people that deserved them in the right place.
