Graduate / Orthopedic Surgery, Residency, Medical School [3]

Why do you want to go into orthopedic surgery?
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The school bell rang. I quickly gathered my books and left the classroom to wait for my father. The Dodge truck pulled up, and we traveled a short distance to our client's home. My father is a landscaper, and I had accompanied him every day after school to learn the tools of his trade. What was initially a responsibility to help support our family of nine became a source of great joy for me. That afternoon, my father and I installed the sprinkler system and finished the deck we had started the day before. Through the years working alongside my father, I cultivated a deep passion in working with my hands, but little did I know it was this passion that influentially paved my career path in orthopedic surgery.

Most of my childhood was spent shadowing my father's footsteps. Since our family's annual income was less than $20,000, my father relied on his hands to build things from scratch or to restore used items bought from garage sales. He was a master handyman, for there was nothing broken in the house that he did not fix or attempt to fix. Growing up, his way of thinking had slowly but deeply ingrained in me. In ninth grade, I began accompanying my father to work to assist him. As I gained more experience and my father's trust, I took on full responsibility for my own landscaping projects from planning to execution. Even as a teenager, I eagerly embraced the challenge of assembling a final product that was both aesthetic and functional, and I was very hard on myself when the outcome failed to meet my expectation. In working closely with my father, I had acquired technical skills and fostered personal qualities including patience, hard work, and self-improvement that later proved invaluable to an aspiring orthopedic surgeon.

My first three years of medical school were dedicated to exploring different fields of medicine to find a career that would offer me both personal and professional fulfillment. I have found this unity in orthopedic surgery. Choosing a specialty in medicine is not unlike taking a kid to the amusement park and asking him to only ride on one rollercoaster. Every medical specialty has its uniqueness and beauties. In the end, I lived by the proverb of pursuing a specialty that makes me truly happy now as well as thirty years into my career. What makes me readily wake up at 3AM to consult and care for a sick patient in the ED? Which rollercoaster will I still get the same surge of enthusiasm to ride on as if it was my first time? What will continually involve and stimulate my intellectual curiosity, creativity, and problem-solving skills? Orthopedic surgery! The sounds of drills and hammers, the practice of taking things apart and putting them back together, and the philosophy of learning-by-doing reminded me of the years working with my father, rekindling my childhood joys and strengthening my resolve to be an orthopedic surgeon.

My sub-internships in orthopedic surgery during fourth year further exposed me to this rewarding field of medicine. I still remember clearly my first orthopedic operations. I watched in admiration as my attendings performed their surgical movements so effortlessly, as if their hands and instruments were one. Like my father, their knowledge and skills were cultivated through years of experience. During each case, the attending surgeon would instruct the residents hands-on, similar to how my father used to teach me, and in this way the science and art of orthopedic surgery were directly passed on from one generation to the next. The close mentoring relationship and immersive learning are what I was accustomed to working with my father, and they are what I long for in residency. In the OR, I have observed how an orthopedic team of individuals from diverse walks of life collectively came together for the wellbeing of our patients. In clinic, I have seen how the understanding of human anatomy and biomechanics was integral to treating both common and complex diseases of the musculoskeletal system. After three sub-internships, I have seen and experienced the breadth of emotions brought about in orthopedic surgery, including the joys of a successful operation and the humility of a failed one.

Orthopedic surgery appeals to me not only because it impacts the physical and emotional wellbeing of my patients but also because the clinical outcome is something I will have full control over. When the OR door shuts behind me, there will be just the patient and the surgery team, and everything from then will rest on a few pairs of collaborating hands. When the light dims and the room comes to a silence, I will be fully absorbed in the operation, drawing from my training and experience to heal the patient lying before me. Hours into the operation when my legs quiver and stomach growls, my hands will remain steady and mind focused. Equally important, I find orthopedic surgery to be profoundly meaningful, recalling from my sub-internships when our team helped the child with scoliosis return to running in the playground with his peers or gave the high school athlete a second opportunity to fulfill her dream of performing at the collegiate level. I know that in orthopedic surgery I will be able to directly impact the lives of many, one surgery at a time.

Finally, orthopedic surgery is an intellectually stimulating and constantly growing field of medicine, so what left unanswered in clinic or the OR is brought up to be answered in the laboratory through basic science and clinical research. In this specialty, there is an endless thirst for advancing the field of medicine in general and orthopedic surgery in particular, and I look forward with enthusiasm to take on this responsibility. In choosing to become an orthopedic surgeon, I pursue a career uniting head and hands, learning and doing, and theory and practice. I am very happy to have found a career that unites my passion in working with my hands with an equal passion in caring for patients suffering from diseases of the musculoskeletal system.

Undergraduate / "My aspiration to be a registered nurse" - Nursing Personal Statement [2]

My Mother-two young children clutch under her fragile arms-stood tall against unyielding tides
Amidst emaciated bodies that hollered waves of faithful prayers and echoing cries
Our exhausted boat stranded; our dream and future entrusted to the wind
Four perilous years, displaced from one asylum after another, but our hope never dwindled within.

Those are flickering memories of my early childhood when my mother, my older sister, and I embarked on a four-year journey across the Pacific Ocean in search of a brighter but uncertain future. During this journey, the constant exposure to seawater, compounded by the lack of adequate medical attention, had left me with a severe bacterial ear infection and a long scar behind my right ear, a living reminder of the hardships and dangers of our emigration.

My family stepped foot on American soil on December 1, 1992. My earliest years in America were occupied with frequent visits to the local clinic to treat my ear infection. It was during these visits that I had the opportunity to observe and interact with the nurses, people whom I considered my miracle workers. The nurses provided me a source of comfort right before each treatment, and they healed me with such motherly care. I admired their work and had often wished to be in their shoes, equipped with the knowledge and skills to heal patients and restore their quality of life. Looking back, my childhood journey had made me a stronger and more determined person today, while my childhood illness had exposed me to a meaningful and rewarding career in nursing.

My aspiration to be a registered nurse continued to take shape throughout my undergraduate study at the University of California, Davis. Here, I further explored my keen interest in the health care field by volunteering as a clinical intern with the Vietnamese Cancer Awareness Research and Education Society (VN-CARES), where I worked alongside physicians and nurses to provide care to uninsured Vietnamese patients in Sacramento, California. At our student-run cancer screening clinic, I bridged the language barrier between health care providers and patients, educated patients on cancer screening and treatment, and received hands-on clinical experience such as taking patients' vital signs. While in college, I was especially devoted to educating children and adolescents in local communities, including tutoring elementary students during after-school programs and informing high school students about HIV/AIDS awareness and prevention. I have found great joy in working with kids and being there for them to give them confidence and a feeling that they are wanted and loved. This fulfillment has inspired me to consider specializing in pediatric care.

An important stepping-stone on my career path was my internship with Child Life at the UC Davis Medical Center, where I tended to the needs of children who were waiting for or recovering from medical treatment. My personal experience with ear infection had instilled in me great empathy for the children's illness, and I fully embraced my responsibility to alleviate their physical and emotional pain. With limited professional training, toys and fairytales became my healing tools. My hands-on interaction with children at Child Life helped me develop a deep admiration for the children's resiliency and courage while cultivating in me qualities essential to an aspiring nurse such as patience, interpersonal skills, and compassion. In working with the nurses at Child Life, I come to appreciate the flexibility and time they have dedicated to their patients in order to build a strong relationship founded on empathy and trust, and I look forward with great enthusiasm to take on that responsibility. The joys and smiles upon the children's faces at Child Life reaffirmed my resolve to pursue a career in pediatric nursing. At present, I yearn for the opportunity to receive my nursing education at the University of San Diego and take a step closer to fulfilling my dream.

As an aspiring nurse, I seek a nursing program that offers a challenging and comprehensive curriculum in which I can gain early exposure to clinical practice and be trained by experienced faculty in a multiculturally diverse learning environment. This is my drive in choosing to pursue my Master of Science in Nursing Degree at the Hahn School of Nursing and Health Science, an accredited and renowned institution. The MEPN program at USD is structured around a values-based curriculum that will educate and prepare me to become not only a skilled nurse clinician, but an ethical and compassionate one as well. Moreover, the curriculum incorporates hands-on standardized patient nursing and simulation. Not only is the student body diverse but so is the patient population of San Diego; thus, during my clinical rotations, I will receive the opportunity to provide quality longitudinal patient care to patients coming from diverse cultures. This unique experience will help me cultivate cultural competence and develop cross-cultural skills that will be invaluable in my nursing practice. At Hahn, one of our nation's distinguished graduate programs in nursing, I am confident that I will obtain a quality nursing education while receiving ample of support and counseling from faculty and classmates.

My professional goal is to become a registered pediatric nurse who provides holistic care to children from medically underserved populations. I grew up in a poor family, thus it will be truly rewarding for me to give back to the community and heal children who come from similar socioeconomic backgrounds. In my nursing practice, I will involve parents in the healing process of their children since informed and responsive parenting is essential to effective health care delivery. In addition, I understand the importance of clinical and translational research in improving health care practice. Therefore, I will endeavor to bridge science and medicine by implementing sound research into my patient care. I also wish to be a leader in my community. As a leader, I will be able to better inform the community of disease prevention and treatment as well as to lobby for improvement of our health care system. Finally, being a nurse is a lifelong learning process, thus I will fully enjoy educating myself and others the progress that our scientific and medical community continually makes.

It is truly rewarding to know that I have chosen a career that will bring happiness and wellbeing to others and to myself. At present, I sincerely hope the Hahn School of Nursing and Health Science will give me the unique opportunity to shape my career dream of being a registered pediatric nurse into reality.

Undergraduate / Stanford's Secondary (medical) [4]

Hi guys. Below is my essay for Stanford's Medical Secondary. Please help me correct my grammars or provide comments :). Thank you for your time and consideration.

Prompt: The Committee on Admissions regards the diversity of an entering class as an important factor in serving the educational mission of the school. The Committee on Admissions strongly encourages you to share unique, personally important, and/or challenging factors in your background, such as the quality of your early educational environment, socioeconomic status, culture, race, ethnicity, sexual orientation, or life or work experiences. Please discuss how such factors have influenced your goals and preparation for a career in medicine. Please limit your answer to 2,000 characters including spaces.

I grew up in a poor rural village in Vietnam where there was a lack of adequate health care and educational opportunities. My family escaped Vietnam by boat when I was two. My parents reluctantly left me behind with my grandma because of my childhood illness.

I immigrated to the United States when I was nine. All through elementary and middle school, my cultural and language barriers hindered my education and assimilation. In the classroom, I struggled to learn English and was regularly teased by my classmates for mispronouncing words or speaking in a foreign accent. At home, I coped with the challenge of bridging the seven-year separation between me and my family.

At present, my parents toil from dawn to dusk each day to support their seven children, four of whom are attending California Universities. Despite their hard work, my parents only manage an annual income of less than $13,000. My family has been very grateful to receive state and federal assistance, and this has propelled me to engage in different volunteer work in college to give back to the community.

As a youth leader at the Vietnamese Educational and Cultural Association, I teach introductory Vietnamese to children in the Bay Area and organize leadership training camps to cultivate their leadership skills and qualities. Each year, the youth and I offer holiday gifts to poor families in Richmond, California, and pay visits to senior citizens at Parkview Health Care Center. In addition, I devote each Saturday morning to helping physicians and nurses provide medical care to patients in poor communities of San Francisco.

My modest upbringing has inspired me to become a compassionate physician who can provide clinical care to the indolent and medically underserved. My multicultural upbringing and empathy for the sick and poor will help me to better understand and connect with people from different walks of life, thus facilitating the delivery of health care to them.

Undergraduate / 'long-established tradition of academic excellence' - Yale's Secondary: School of Medicine [9]

Hi everyone. Please provide comments/corrections to my essay for Yale's secondary. Thank you :)!

*Simone: I hope this essay is better than the previous. I've tried to discuss more about how Yale's program might interest me.. :)

Prompt: Please use this space to write an essay in which you discuss your interest in the Yale University School of Medicine. Please limit your response to 500 words.

I am fervently interested in pursuing my degree of Doctor of Medicine at Yale University because of its long-established tradition of academic excellence, where I know I will receive the best education possible. At Yale, I can study under an integrated curriculum, engage in clinical practice and biomedical research, and work with experienced mentors and other aspiring physicians in a multiculturally diverse community-a stimulating and comprehensive medical education.

As a responsible and self-motivated student, I wish to take an active role in my medical education and learn for my future to become the best physician I can be. Yale creates an environment where I can focus on understanding and appreciating medicine, rather than competing for certain grades or class rankings. I am a more active learner in a cooperative environment, and my goal in medical school is not to compete with my peers but to work together with them and help each other grow as students and aspiring physicians. Yale's structuring of the classroom into small-group seminars or conferences will allow me to engage in a high level of cooperation with my colleagues and establish close mentoring relationships with knowledgeable physicians and scientists who are at the forefront of their fields.

I wish to pursue a medical program that will allow me to walk in the physician's shoes to explore the roles and responsibilities of a professional healthcare provider. Under the Yale System, I will be able to gain early exposure to patient care by partaking in clinical clerkships at the Yale-New Haven Hospital. This intensive clinical program will help me bridge theory and practice as I apply my knowledge and skills in clinical settings to make a positive difference in people's lives. In rotating through different areas of medicine, from surgery to clinical neuroscience, I can strengthen and broaden my medical knowledge and clinical skills, in addition to cultivating a physician's compassionate attitude essential to a healthy doctor-patient encounter.

I have truly enjoyed my undergraduate research at Berkeley and am committed to make research an integral part of my medical education and practice. At Yale, I can involve in self-directed biomedical research through the Medical Student Research Program. With a background in cancer research, I hope to pursue my M.D. thesis at the Yale Cancer Center, where I can integrate science and medicine to study an important aspect of cancer physiology and contribute to the University's rich research culture. Engaging in Yale's research program will help me develop important scientific skills, including critical thinking and problem solving, which I can integrate into my clinical practice to become a better physician.

Finally, I will feel at home at Yale because of its multiculturally diverse medical campus, one which lends an air of cultural sensitivity and celebration. Here, I can interact with ninety-nine other aspiring physicians from different walks of life and learn and appreciate medicine from their perspectives and cultures. Yale's cultural diversity will help promote and foster my cultural competence, which is important in providing effective care for today's diverse patient population. I look forward to the great opportunity to pursue my medical education at Yale University.

Undergraduate / 'DNA Repair / Surgery / Medicine / Upbringing' - Short Response to Johns Hopkins [3]

Hi. Below are my short responses to Johns Hopkins. Please help correct my grammars or provide comments. Thank you :)!

Briefly describe your most rewarding experience or some achievement of which you are particularly proud (900 characters).

Last summer, I was sponsored by the UC Berkeley Summer Undergraduate Research Fellowships to conduct my independent project titled "DNA Repair Pathway in Heterochromatin" in the Karpen Lab at Lawrence Berkeley National Laboratory. Using molecular techniques such as cloning and immunofluorescence, I deeply engaged in the study of how the cells recognize and repair DNA double-strand breaks in their genomes. Within the SURF community, I met and learned from other student scholars who were pursuing interesting projects, from excavating Neanderthal remains in Russia to exploring HIV transmission in Malawi. Moreover, I had a rewarding opportunity to give a PowerPoint presentation of my research to principal investigators, postdoctoral scholars, and other SURF fellows. This was an intellectually stimulating experience, and I truly enjoyed the creativity and innovation in self-directed research.

Are there any areas of medicine that are of particular interest to you? If so, please comment (1100 characters).

Of the many dynamic fields of study in medicine, one particularly stands out for me: surgery. I developed a fervent interest in surgery while studying at UC Berkeley, where I dissected human cadavers in an anatomy course and performed biweekly dissections on anesthetized rabbits in the Forte Lab. My interest is further heightened through my volunteer work at SF General Hospital. There, I have shadowed physicians as they performed preliminary surgeries to stabilize trauma patients before transporting them to the OR. On two occasions, I was given the opportunity to help stitch up a deep laceration across a man's head and cast a patient's left foot with a broken tibia and fibula.

Surgery is a stimulating and interactive branch of medicine, one which will allow me to engage in extensive communication and collaboration with a team of surgeons to carry out successful operations. It will be truly rewarding to develop the skills and knowledge to help patients recover from life-threatening traumas or diseases. I look forward with great enthusiasm to learning the tools of the surgeon's trade.

Briefly describe a situation where you had to overcome adversity; include lessons learned and how you think it will affect your career as a future physician (900).

When I first immigrated to the US, I struggled to learn the English language to adapt to American schools and to be able to tutor my younger siblings. My parents spoke no English and were busy toiling from dawn to dusk to support their seven children. Because of my family's limited means, I took full advantage of different public resources, from attending after-school homework clubs to engaging in the local library's summer reading programs, to improve my English. My painstaking effort and diligence have paid off as I am now finishing my double major at UC Berkeley with high honors.

In overcoming my adversity, I have learned to consider each challenge a life learning experience and undertake it with determination and perseverance. As a future physician, I will encounter many challenges in my practice of medicine, and I will always approach each with great confidence and assiduousness.

If Applicable, describe a situation where you were not in the majority (1100).
I first stepped foot in the US when I was nine. All through elementary and middle school, my cultural and language barriers hindered my education and assimilation. I was regularly teased by other kids for mispronouncing words or speaking in a foreign accent. Growing up, I was very self-conscious of my minority background and often kept to myself.

In high school, I volunteered to be a youth leader at the Vietnamese Educational and Cultural Association, where I currently teach introductory Vietnamese to children in my community. Working with the youth has helped me to take pride in my identity as a Vietnamese American and to embrace the richness and beauties of both cultures. At Berkeley, I was able to share my Vietnamese customs and traditions with other undergraduate students through teaching a course called "Vietnam and Vietnamese Culture through Films."

My upbringing has instilled in me a deep empathy for the minority and inspired me to become a compassionate physician who will utilize my multicultural background to provide effective care for patients from all walks of life.

Undergraduate / Satisfactions from activities as a physician - Columbia University Secondary [35]

Hi. Please help revise my response to a secondary question from Columbia. Thank you :)!

What satisfactions do you expect to receive from your activities as a physician?

Enter your response in essay format. LIMIT WRITING TO 2475 CHARACTERS.

As a volunteer at San Francisco General Hospital, I have worked closely with ER physicians and witnessed first hand the priceless satisfactions they obtain from their clinical work. While working and interacting with these physicians, I have noticed that their sources of satisfaction come not only from saving lives, but also from daily genuine acts of kindness, such as giving a child a warm hug following a painful treatment. It is the greatest feeling to help patients recover from life-threatening traumas or achieve complete remission from diseases like cancer.

I am very excited for the opportunities and challenges that await me, knowing that, as a physician, I will have a direct impact on a patient's life and wellbeing. The ability to help patients heal, both physically and psychologically, and allow them to resume their lives is most rewarding and humbling for me. In treating my patients, I look forward to learning from their myriad medical conditions, as well as their unique life experiences, cultures, and values. I hope to establish healthy doctor-patient relationships on trust and compassion, which will help me to better treat and educate my patients.

Growing up with severe asthma and limited health care has inspired me to become a compassionate physician who can provide patient care to the poor and underserved. My family and I have been very grateful to receive adequate health care through the Medi-Cal program. As an aspiring physician, I long for the opportunity to give back to the community by offering clinical care to those less fortunate. My multicultural upbringing and empathy for the sick and poor will help me to better understand and connect with people from different walks of life, thus facilitating the delivery of health care.

Finally, I look forward to working in a scholarly community comprised of individuals from diverse health disciplines who share a common passion: to touch the lives of others through medicine. Here, I can learn from my mentors and collaborate with my colleagues to properly diagnose and manage the care of my patients. I wish to join hands with them in clinical research, where I can integrate science and medicine to find solutions to the health challenges afflicting today's society. As a physician, I will receive true satisfaction from caring for patients, offering health care to underserved communities, learning from mentors and colleagues, and resolving current health problems through research.

Undergraduate / Medical Secondary [26]

Hi. Please help revise my short response to a secondary question from Columbia University. Thank you. :)

Prompt: What aspect of the Columbia-Bassett Program has the most appeal for you?

I grew up in a rural village myself, and therefore, I had experienced first-hand the lack of comprehensive health care that often exists in remote areas. I strongly believe that all ill patients deserve quality care, and the greatest potential of medicine is reached only when it becomes boundless. It's inspiring to know that the Columbia-Bassett Program shares the same views. In joining this unique program, I pursue one of my enduring aspirations, which is to make medical care and services equally accessible across socioeconomic boundaries. I'm greatly excited at the prospect of working alongside experienced physicians of Bassett Healthcare and devoted classmates of Columbia University to serve the rural community of Cooperstown, NY.

Undergraduate / 'trauma patient emergency care' - Supplement essay medical school [17]

Hi. Please help me correct my supplemental essay for medical school :). Thank you for your time and consideration.

Do you have unique experiences or obstacles that you have overcome that were not covered in your application about which you would like to inform our Admissions Committee? (maximum 3000 characters including spaces)

It was a hectic Saturday morning in the Emergency Department at San Francisco General Hospital, one which I still vividly remember. I was working my usual volunteer shift, filling empty gurneys with oxygen tanks and conversing with patients situated along the hallway. Our friendly conversations were suddenly interrupted by a piercing alarm sound. I knew what was coming. As I headed for the blood bank, a team of surgeons scuttled pass me and assembled in front of Trauma Room 1. When I returned with a fresh batch of blood, the ER walls flickered with flashes of siren light, and a young adult was wheeled in on a stretcher covered with blood. His face grimaced in pain. In the trauma room, I helped the nurses cut his clothes and immediately applied gauze pads to stem the bleeding of his multiple gunshot wounds. Unfortunately, one of the bullets had struck the patient's left eye, leaving it dangling from its socket. X-ray images were taken, monitoring devices hooked up, and the team of surgeons began their preliminary surgeries to stabilize the patient. From then on, it was a race against time. "Hang on in there," I softly reassured him.

I stood by the patient's side, frequently spraying his wounds with a cleaning solution to help the physicians see their surgical procedures. My hands violently trembled, and I was overwhelmed and terrified by the incident. I have cut open sedated mice and rabbits before; I have dissected human cadavers as well. But this was something else: before my eyes laid a human being whose life hung in the balance. I have encountered many life-threatening injuries during my volunteer work at SFGH, but this one in particular stands out because of the severity of the patient's condition and the violent cause of the injury. Though I was incredibly nervous, I felt a strong sense of responsibility toward the patient. I calmed myself and continued helping the physicians and nurses until the patient was stable.

Through this hands-on experience, I received the opportunity to help provide emergency care for the trauma patient. I also had the opportunity to closely watch and learn as the surgeons utilized state-of-the-art medical technology to perform various operations. Despite the frenetic setting of the ER, I was amazed by how composed and skilled the surgeons were. After a few weeks in the hospital, the patient recovered, and his eyesight was fully restored. It was a rewarding feeling to be able to help the patient recuperate from such a horrific trauma, even if the act was simply retrieving blood from the blood bank or stemming the bleeding. This unique experience has given me a greater admiration for the art of the surgeon and fostered my interest in pursuing this medical field of study.