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Posts by The Everest
Name: Soe Htet Aung
Joined: Mar 16, 2016
Last Post: Mar 24, 2016
Threads: 4
Posts: 3  

From: Myanmar
School: University of Public Health

Displayed posts: 7
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The Everest   
Mar 24, 2016
Writing Feedback / The criminal should do some community services rather than putting them inside the prison. IELTS 2 [2]

IELTS TASK 2
Some people believe that crime rate can be reduced by giving a long punishment, while others say there are alternate ways to reduce crime. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

It has been said that some criminals should be detained not to be harmful to society by means of long time imprisonment . On the another side of this argument, they should be trained to do community services instead of imprisonment. Despite the presence of the positive and negative in each perspective, I strongly hold the opposite view; the criminal should do some community services rather than putting them inside the prison.

When we look at the first argument in favor of incarceration, the prison acts as a models for potential sinners not to commit the wrong doings. Some criminals should be detain inside such these detention centers for long time. As the result of this, they will not disturb the life of normal people. They should regret their wrong acts and lead a miserable life inside the jail for the punishment of their offense.

On the other hand, it is undoubtedly that the social norms and values have totally changed in today world. In this modern belief, not all offenders are good for nothing, they should trained to make good living in their later life. To cite on my example, they should learn somethings such as languages, vocational trainings and other activities of interests instate of enjoying public money. It is true to say that there can also work for them to reduce the expense in the prison. These labour force from the criminals will be a great contribution to the societies. By doing so, I am sure, it is the best way to raise their awareness and change their life style.

To recapitulate, these are the reasons for both pros and corns of long imprisonment. Nevertheless, government have the responsibility to protect innocent life of the people from the brutal criminals. My strong point, we have to find the best way for this argument by means of researching or comprehensive approaches together with community.
The Everest   
Mar 23, 2016
Writing Feedback / IELTS Task 1 - Environmental impacts due to over logging activities. [2]

The flowchart reveals the environmental impacts of logging activities. Generally, it clearly demonstrates that destructive logging practices seriously reduce the forest's ability to carry out vital environmental and ecological functions.

First of all, when we look at an increasing trend of folding and soil erosion , heavy logging machines and equipments degrade and destroy the soil. As the result of this consequences, the fewer roots from cutting trees can not hold the top soil which becomes hard and soil erosion in the rainy season. During this time, the soil is irresistible to maximum flow of rain water and soil erosion occurs the folds. Consequently, this phenomenon can lead to destruction of wildlife populations and vegetation.

It is undeniable that the destructive forest fires has been exacerbated by logging activities from the waste woods. Resulting in this wild fires leading to loss of pastures for wild animals and less biodiversity. On the other hand, large-scale logging becomes drastic changes in precipitation of trees directly when the forest cover is removed. These changes also make lengthening dry periods.

To sum up, it reveals that steps must be taken into account urgently in order to ensure that rainforests and survival of wide animals.




The Everest   
Mar 23, 2016
Writing Feedback / IELTS task 1: New buildings arrangement - West Park Secondary School maps [2]

30 years interval Overall, the school area had been expanded immensely.

The area of the school block had been widen insince 1980, two times from its sizelarger than initial buildingwhen it was constructed .

To sum up, according to the changes in the maps, it can be said that the number of students in this secondary school seemed to increase during this period.
The Everest   
Mar 22, 2016
Writing Feedback / The diagram show how the Australian Bureau of Meteorology collects up to date weather forecasting [2]

The diagram illustrates the collection of data about up-to- date weather forecasting by Australian Bureau of Methodology. Generally, they collect the data from all of the sources and deliver the message through medias within a short period.

Firstly, they collect the information of weather condition from three main sources which are satellite, radar station and drifting buoy. In the analysis stage, they analyze the satellite photo that send from the space station, then they always scrutinize the radar screen all the time and they also use synoptic chart in order to guess the situation of the sea water.

Meanwhile, these collected raw data are interpreted by computer at the meteorological station. After that, the always broadcast up to date weather forecasting program by means of TV, radio and telephone as the recorded announcement.

To sum up, Australian Bureau of Methodology set up the system to collect the latest data from all possible sources and transforms these data into timely information to save the lives of Australian people.




The Everest   
Mar 21, 2016
Writing Feedback / Scientific research today attempts to go too far. (ielts task 2) [5]

People try to answer every question that the universe hasin the universe

But my point of view is in the opposite,I am of the different opinion i disagree with the statement mentioned.

We human with our curiosity are natural it is deniable that our curiosity is natural phenomenon

(...) The more problems come, the more inventions are found. You should add more negative points.
The Everest   
Mar 20, 2016
Writing Feedback / The reasons for choosing certain courses and how they should be paid - Ielts [2]

The charts show the findings of a survey of adult education in which figure 1 reveals the reasons for choosing this courses and figure 2 illustrates how each of this course should share.

When we look at the reason for choosing the courses, interesting in subject was the commonest reason among the people whereas 40 % of them answered for that reason. After that, to gain their qualification was the second most commonest reason among them which was 38%. Others three reasons were not quite different in this survey such as helpful for current job, job promotion and to enjoy in studying which accounted for 22% 20% and 19% respectively. The rest two reasons were not remarkable, 12% of them chose to change their jobs and 9% of them answered to meet new people.

Moving closer to pie chart, 40% of them taught that they should spend their own money which was followed by 35 % of people who answered the course should be shared by their employer and 25% thought that the cost should be paid by tax players.

In conclusion, interesting in subject was the main reason in order to choose their course and most of the people taught that they should spend their costs individually.




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