Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK2: more children are accessing the internet unsupervised. [2]

More and more children as accessing the internet unsupervised and at a younger age.This can sometimes put children at risk.
What problems do you think parens face when dealing with their children using the internet?
How can this problem be solved?

The computer is considered as a wonder invention of modern world and young people are more attracted to using computers than the older age.It may result in having detrimental effects an children lifes so there are some solutions to tackle with this obsession between young ages and the internet.

Firstly,anonymously using the internet is spread readily yo annoy,abuse,threaten or harass the children who receive the communication via internet.Lots of family have worry for their kids when they surfing because the child abuse and other offences related to clidren are getting warmer around the world.Secondly,there are many con-artist out there,who approach gullible individuals online for the purpose of money exaotation,after getting personal information about parents from their kids.

There are a few things that can be done by parents to reduce the risk of children from the deceptive individuals.The firt step could be that being kept a closer watch on children,who are often connection to internet.Parents,therefore,have to control or browse which kind of sites were visited once again.The second step,they should buy the limited access users ,thus anyone would go surfing in safe and they could be protected the ongoing supervised dangers in internet.

To conclude,the accessing everhthing contained in internet could be unstoppable so lots of parents home to search the way of protection setting from any detimental effects will be danger to kids in future.

Writing Feedback / Offences that are commited using a computer are more and more common this days.. [2]

Internet crime is increasing rapidly as more and more people around the world are accessing the internet.
What are the worst internet crimes?
How can they be prevented?

Cyber crime is broadly defined by technology company,as any offences that are commited using a computer,network or hardware devices.It is not new occurence so many people are worriying about accessing internet.There are such pivotal kinds of crimes such as the spread of anonymous accounts and the duplication of original accounts.

Firstly,the copying of primary account is the biggest case to people who access to internet in order to do personal or business banking.For this reason,being cautious when giving out personal detail information such as financial information on the internet.There are many trickster people

who are using the internet to threaten to cause damage with the intent to exort from any person or other thing of value.Secondly,anonymously accessing in it to annoy , abuse ,threaten,or harass the person who receives the communication is a deceptive manner for somebody.

There are many steps to hinder as possible being trap.The first step could be constantly updating your personal information, thus preserved throughout accessing to web.The second step,installing security programs in computer would protect agains cyber criminals.In this way could be helpfull to be guarante that your privately owned knowledge could not be taken hold unauthorized.

To conclude , internet crimes are more pivotal offense related to people lives and getting danger for people,who are continuously users, but taking for guarante your personal information you have to be cautious and set the security programs are livesaving opinion to far away from any crimes.

and please could anyone give me points related to ielts writing score?

Writing Feedback / One set fixed punishment for all crimes is more efficient. [2]

Many people believe that having a fixed punishment for all crimes is more efficient.
What are the advantages and disadvantages of having a fixed punishment?

It is commonly considered by many that whether punishments for crimes should be fixed.Although there are some disadvantages of fixed punishments,I believe that it is better to judge each crime individually.

There are some positive outcomes for having one set punishment for each crime.First of all,the system of fixed punishment for each crime would be dissuasive from offending crime because,during imprisonment,being inmate with somebody who are killer is too scary for a robber.Secondly, discriminated against ordinary people may disappear and celebrities and politicians could be judged the some way.This means will be no more complaints about the corrupt justice system due to the class discrimination among people.

However,I would argue that the circumstances of a crime and offender's motivation should have an influence on the punishments.For example,stealing to feed a family cannot be treated the same way as stealing for profit.In such cases,only the judge who takes all additional information about the crime into the consideration can give the best response.Admittedly,the jury can also decide whether an offender had evil intentions or just tried to survive.As a result,this approach would make a more humane justice system.

In conclusion,despite the disadvantages of fixed punishments,it seems to me that each crime should be judge taking both the circumstances and motivation into account.