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Posts by eris28 [Suspended]
Name: Eristyana Yunindio
Joined: Aug 10, 2016
Last Post: Aug 15, 2016
Threads: 3
Posts: 4  
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From: Indonesia
School: Universitas Gadjah Mada

Displayed posts: 7
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eris28   
Aug 12, 2016
Writing Feedback / Free Things to Do in Rio (Explore Brazil's bustling city on a budget) [4]

Since Brazil become place where the Olympic held now, let's have a look to one of the famous city, Rio!

Based on the article released by nationalgeographic.com, in Rio u will find place with jaw-dropping view as well as renaissance culture and delicioso food.

Christ the Redeemer, one of the famous statue known as a landmark of Brazil is on the first list of place to visit. Traveler usually pay about $22 to ride a cog train up to the statue's perch atop Corcovado Mountain for sweeping breathtaking panorama of Rio. Visitors also can hike to the Cristo via a jungle path from Parque Lage. Another enchant place is Sugarloaf, a 1,300-foot granite mountain rising up from the mouth of Guanabara Bay. The ticket for cable car costs about $25. Rio botanical garden just cost $2 to see the orchid house with 2,000 varieties; the bonsai and cherry trees in the Japanese Garden; and the giant Amazonian water lilies. Have a peek to the Catedral Metropolitana (Metropolitan Cathedral of Saint Sebastian) in historic Centro.

Exploring the culture, go to the Centro Cultural Banco do Brasil, known as CCBB, now houses art galleries, cinemas, theaters, a bookstore, and a café. Usually there is free rotating art exhibitions, or you just want to relax in the atrium and bask in the building's neoclassical architecture. Established in 2014 during World Cup, the Museu de Arte do Rio combines old and new architecture by Emperor Dom Joăo VI and a modernist art school. Good news, admission is free on Tuesdays and on Wednesday Museu de Arte Contemporânea (MAC)-Niterói is free entrance. This museum have unique design shaped a UFO. Don't miss Lapa, the ground zero for the city's vibrant street art. Big carnival held in September and February, or why not to learn samba?

Yum yum! Go to fresh markets (feira livre) held each morning in a different neighborhood of the city. Ask the host for exact locations. Try milho verde (corn on the cob), and espetinhos (grilled meat) in Cariocas (Rio locals) street or beach vendors for less than a dollar.

So write Rio on the list, shall we?
eris28   
Aug 12, 2016
Writing Feedback / Beware, We Will Run Out of Water if We Don't Do These Things! [5]

Hola Kendal,
I love the article that u choose. I found it very interesting topic since I'm keen on go green army. lol.
well, all the mistakes already mentioned in that bunch comment above so i no need to mention it again. what i wanna say is let's be an earth warrior, goo green keep our mother earth!.

kisskiss.
eris28   
Aug 11, 2016
Writing Feedback / HERE'S WHY RIO'S OLYMPIC DIVING POOL TURNED GREEN! [3]

He guys here is another summary from the news that i read on Cosmopolitan website wrote by Gina.

As we know, Olympic is become a hot issue since it is underway now. The latest news came from Rio's Olympic diving pool where the swimming competition held. On Wednesday the water turned green which caused by a proliferation of algae as an effect of the decrease in alkalinity.

FINA, the international federation of swimming told that the color changes cause by water tanks run out some of the chemicals used in the water treatment process. As the result, the pH of the water was outside the usual range. But FINA Sport Medicine Committee gave statement that it cause no dangerous for the swimmer and already handled by the Olympic committee.

Few water polo players already have already complained about their eyes become burn because of high contain of chlorine. Out of this water color changed phenomenon, the water Olympic game is still going.

Source: cosmopolitan.com/entertainment/news/a62622/rio-olympics-gree-pool/.
eris28   
Aug 11, 2016
Writing Feedback / Pandas Get to Know Their Wild Side - article from National Geographic [9]

Hi azmi.
What a good topic! It's panda. 😀
Well, i found some mistakes on ur summary, dirrectly on tue first line.
[bears are released] --》 u can write "released" without are.
Well. Thats all for this, u can ask me more directly fir the rest. Lol.

Hasta lavista!
eris28   
Aug 11, 2016
Writing Feedback / Stem cell brain injections let people walk again after stroke [4]

Hi ifory. Overall its really good. 😊
But maybe i just wanna mention the first line :
This article highlights information relating stroke suffer. I guess it better if u say, this article highlights information related to stroke suffer.
And second line:
According to recent study, conclude researcher, result showed.
Hmm if u say it it seems there is 'something' that need to fix. Maybe u can say according to recent study which concluded by the researcher (....study, conclution of the researcher).....

Thanks. 😉
eris28   
Aug 10, 2016
Writing Feedback / Plan to Replant Millions of Trees in Central England Slows Down [2]

Hi everyone,
I did my first summarized an article. Feed back is very welcome! please correct my English as well as the contain.

Based on the article entitled Plan to replant millions of trees in central England slows down by Aisling Irwin, informed about the establishment of artificial forest in English Midlands which getting slows down nowadays. The goal is to reforest third of a 500m2 of land in South of the city of Derby, but it seems hard to finish it for another half century. It is because of the transformation of the land which used for another purpose such as opencast mines, quarries that increasing forest cover around 6-20%. 8.5 million trees have been planted. The income of this project already reached £373 million from 8 million visitors in 2014.

During 2015-16 the rate of the planting is just 110 hectares. It is dramatically dropped from 2000s which reached 500 hectares. It caused by the price of the land is getting higher and the land lord prefers to rent their land for other sectors which give higher price. Government pays landowners to grow forest, but it is not the same after 2006 when the EU regulation chance, also the most easily converted land has been planted.

20 years later, the large of forest predicted getting decrease therefore reforest project need to manage goodly otherwise we will lost the economic opportunities from wood production and tourism. It may take decades to reforest but it worth because forests are a long-term venture.

Source: < newscientist.com/article/2100496-plan-to-replant-millions-of-trees-in-central-england-slows-down/>
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