Why I chose UK and the 3 Courses - Chevening Studying in UK question

Hello, this is my answer to Studying in UK question, feedback is welcomed and appreciated, thank you in advance.

Outline why you have selected your chosen three university courses, and explain how this relates to your previous academic or professional experience and your plans for the future. Please do not duplicate the information you have entered on the work experience and education section of this form (minimum word count: 100 words, maximum word count: 500 words)

inclusive education

Inclusive education is not a novel term to education in Indonesia. Equalization for special children with learning difficulties has been encouraged by the government for a long time even since the year of 2000. Schools have also been encouraged to implement it. However, to say that it was just an encouragement without further actions may be correct since in 2018 reality says otherwise. There are still plentiful number of schools, mine included, that do not grasp the true concept of inclusive education. Even the majority of educators are still not familiar with the term inclusive education. In the end, special children have not been openly accepted in mainstream schools and when they do, mistreatment is still commonly found. Indonesia is lacking in human resources who are experts in this field. There are also no universities that have specifically opened majors in inclusive education. Therefore, UK, a country that has successfully implemented inclusive education on its whole study levels and whose universities have opened departments for inclusive education with a lot of experts and professionals inside, is my first choice.

My choices fall to these three university courses:
University (name), MA Special and Inclusive Education. The course will develop my knowledge and key concepts and issues related to special and inclusive education, enhancing my understanding of disciplinary and theoretical perspective. The compulsory modules about concept and contexts of inclusion align with my learning objective. It also offers optional modules such as Autism, Understanding Dyslexia, and Language Development. All fits my objectives.

University (name), MA Education (Inclusive Education). This program focuses my skills and builds my qualifications, knowledge and understanding to teach and support students in special and inclusive settings. The program combines the latest research with practical coursework so that it will ensure the learners are equipped to implement a range of evidence-based approaches and strategies. It also offers teaching methods and techniques in inclusion, a core course I need the most. For specializations, Early Childhood caught my interest since I work in a lower level students environment.

University (name), MA Special and Inclusive Education. This course offers a comprehensive focus on contemporary debates within special and inclusive education including local, national and international policies and approaches. It aligns with the core course: Debating and Researching Special and Inclusive education. For the optional course Communication and Literacy fits my learning objectives. The courses also cover family-understanding part for the special needs students.

My job as a primary school teacher and an activist who faces students with various learning difficulties and somehow was still unable to put the right method is the reason why I want to develop my current "regular" teacher career into a teacher who is an expert in the field of inclusive education that will be useful for the development of inclusion in my country. My background of academic in education also aligns with the course I am interested in. I am eager to learn and to apply the knowledge I will acquire to my country and my professional teaching development.

Hi, I think the first paragraph and the description of the chosen course is already fine.
However I would like to make some notes on the last paragraph. It looks like you're a little bit in a hurry completing the essay.

I worked as ... and also an activist who faces students ... I was unable to determine the right method to conduct the teaching method. This was my reason why I would like to develop the traditional teaching system that was applied in my career now into the teaching method with inclusive education approach. I believe that this method will be useful for the development of inclusion in my country...

Sorry if I missed your point, but I would change some of the 'common vocabulary' and turned it into something more advanced. I also dividing some of the long sentences into shorter sentences to make a stress on some point.

Fitri, you need to explain your academic foundation for your chosen courses in line with your professional objectives. The essay doesn't even ask you to explain your objectives. It's asking you to justify your academic and professional preparedness to undertake these courses of study. You are not explaining those at all in your essay. The academic preparedness should be explained at the start while the professional relevance of your course choice should be included with every course choice. You cannot simply state that the course offerings align with your learning or professional objectives. You need to explain how these will be used in your profession in detail.

A better discussion of your course choice in line with your professional experience it's in order. You will need to revise the opening and closing paragraphs while increasing the relevance of the discussion to your profession on a per course and university basis. Revise the essay presentation in it's entirety so that all the required elements may be properly addressed.