Course of life, view of life, study background, hopes and wishes, education and work experience

My View of Life & my motivations

My course of life, my view of life, study background, my hopes and wishes, your education and work experience, my motivations for applying for this program.

Please help me brothers.... And also need suggestion that which should be deleted to make it short....

My name is XYZ. I was born into a middle class family where we live in a small city called YBZ, district of Bangladesh. l spent my school, college and University life in Sylhet city. I was an active and friendly person since my childhood and I love to participate in sports and events.

From the early age of my life, I saw my mother as a manager and my father as a fund raiser and accountant in our family. They did hard work to look after our family. The purpose of them was just to make their child good and honest man. I believe their sacrifice have established today's me. From my family, I have learned how to aim and hard work to achieve goal. I get basic knowledge about management, finance and accounting from my parents. On that time, I wished I will be finance manager someday.

To make my dream come true, I have completed Bachelor of Business Administration with major in finance and banking in 2014. But this achievement gives me a very clear concept about my skills and weakness and makes me able to understand my analytical and problem solving capabilities. These skills and my enthusiasm captivate me to be a Professional Auditor who can contribute to Economic development of Bangladesh. For that reason, I hope I will study in the field of Accounting.

I think life is the combination of happiness, sad and hard work. If we can balance these combinations, we will be succeeded. If anyone is happy, so he thinks life is beautiful. But when he fails to do something, he thinks life is difficult. He may get frustrated. But this is the main point of success. Because we know failure is the pillar of success. So if he takes this failure as a learning and do hard work to achieve his goal, I believe he will be the winner. This is what I learn from my parents. Though they are not so much educated, but they are my teachers, conductor of my life.

From such inspiration/view of my life, I thought that I need to do something for the future. I have to do something for which I will be appraised. In my study life, I tried to understand around and solve the problems we faced. From that sense, I made an online platform where students will be benefited by sharing their books worldwide. In addition, I am also a partner of online Bangla University and trying to establish it where students can develop their knowledge and skills in their mother language. I hope someday I will give lecture in My Online University.

During my study, I involved myself with various extracurricular activities, especially Social Services Club of Leading University and organized lots of program such as blood donation program, drawing competition, helping poor in winter season etc. This voluntary work had beneficiary effects for connecting with more people and established my morality. After graduation, l was appointed as Senior Executive Officer at information based organization, Sylhet Yellow Pages Ltd. and served until 16 August, 2015. Though this is not related to my subject, but I gained great experience in time, team, operations and client management. These experiences helped me to enhance my knowledge and skills.

I think my application for Korean Government Scholarship Program is to support not only my study but also my dream. To be professional auditor and make me qualified lecturer for my University motivated me to apply for this program. And also I am encouraged to gain more experiences with international students and atmosphere. Moreover, As an Asian tiger and the center of Asian business, South Korea has many lessons which will teach me not only about Global and booming Asian business but also to understand about non-profit organization that how they operate. I hope I will able to implement my knowledge what I will learn through this Scholarship program to develop my dream and the country's economy.

Studying in Korea will broaden my international outlook. I am more likely to study in order to get more precious and sophisticated education. It is true that in Korea, education quality is much better than our country. I am also excited that I will get an opportunity to learn Korean language, Because language is the key to understand the Korean people, Korean culture and their business activities from where I will able to gain real experiences. I saw a movie named "Train to Busan" which also encourages me to learn Korean language. I really enjoyed this film. Moreover, I will collaborate with students and instructors, and professors from different backgrounds and international societies to create and develop my professional abilities. In addition, through this scholarship program, I will be able to help my new Korean friends in sharing their knowledge by my website. I will be grateful if my project comes in their help.

Everybody should have a commitment to make this world a better place to live, and I feel I have a responsibility as well. During my contemporary course Business Studies, i taught and realized that to lead the next era and the knowledge I need to combine my knowledge academic background and international experience that I have gained during my course, which would eventually benefit the people of this world and hopefully will make this world a better place to live. My exceptional understanding of the fundamentals of business and finance will aid me in my higher studies, my excellent team working, organizational and communication skills will reinforce it and I am confident my hard determination to achieve positive results will push my higher study towards success.

Summarizing all written above, I believe that my serious intention for study, my certifications and academic background will be beneficial for my higher studies. The KGSP scholarship will give me more opportunity for my career. Attending your prestigious scholarship would give me an opportunity to receive high-level education under the guidance of prominent professors and excellent teachers. I am willing to travel around, as I enjoy exploring and learning new cultures. I would regard my admission into Korean university not only as a great honour, expand my potential in the future and as a great responsibility and challenge to prove myself.

I get basic knowledge about management, finance and accounting ...

How about writing the above as;
From my parents, I acquired basic knowledge on management, accounting, and finance and wished to one day become a finance manager.

And this paragraph this
To make my dream come true, I have completed Bachelor ...
This way
I took a step to achieve my dream having graduated in 2014, with a Bachelor degree in Business Administration. This great achievement has given me a clearer view of my skills, weaknesses, being able to understand, analyze and solve problems. My skills and enthusiasm is now an intrigue. My wish is to major in accounting, and become a professional auditor who can contribute to the development of Bangladesh economic.

@Silver92, I am also applying for a program via the KGSP and so would like to wish you luck. Who knows hopefully we will see in Korea

Ali, you need to expand on the professional experience that you have. While it may not be relevant to the masters degree that you have applied for, surely there is some sort of connection between the two that has motivated you to pursue higher studies. If this is all about changing your career then explain why you have a strong motivation to change careers. What is it about this masters degree that tells you your future lies in this field instead of the first one that you entered? What motivating factors surround that decision? More importantly, how do you see that motivating factor helping advance your career in the future?

Please reorganize your essay content to be more aligned with the prompt listing. That will make it easier for the reviewer to scan for the necessary information in case he does not have the time to read the whole essay. Make sure that you present all of the information in a manner that is cohesive and logical. Right now, your essay tends to jump around the discussion topics which makes it difficult to read and keep track of of the information you are providing. Group the information into requirements and present the related information in one paragraph alone in order to make it easier to read your letter of self introduction.

Ali, this is a very confusing letter of introduction. There is no clarity regarding what your particular masters degree will be since being an educator and an auditor are two different things and you will only be allowed to take one masters degree course in Korea. You have to decide if you will be an educator or an auditor. If your plan is to open an online university, you should revise the essay to talk about how you have been motivated to become an educator instead. That way the self introduction will have a focused discussion topic throughout the essay. The reasons that you have for studying in Korea should be based on more than just a movie that you saw which you enjoyed watching. What are the deeper reasons you have for wanting to study in Korea? How does your interest to study in Korea relate to your desire to become a better educator? That will be a good enough response to the reason regarding why you wish to study in Korea. Your work experience does not relate to your desire to set up an online university and be an educator. Do you have any sort of experience in the teaching field? You need to build up that professional reference in order to make your essay more relevant to your application.

I am afraid you are not focused enough to write this essay. You have not actually chosen your masters degree course yet. You have to work out what your masters course will be first and then work on collecting your relevant educational and work experience. Only then will you be able to properly write a usable draft of the letter of introduction.

@Holt

I want to study masters in Accounting. This degree will help me to gain such knowledge which I can share through video lecture in online university.I want to study Accounting because I feel I love Accounting sub. I love to analysis. And also this course will help me to sit for ACCA which will lead me to be professional auditor.

These degree will create profile of me. And also I will work in Accounting department of online university to manage financial transactions.

Now what can I do?

Revise the whole essay to discuss your accounting background and interests in relation to the prompt requirements. Focus the essay only on the discussion of accounting as the masters degree course that you want to enroll in. Revise the content to show off your educational experience and professional experience in the field of accounting. You can mention becoming an auditor in the future. Talk about accounting and how you see it incorporated into your future. Do not discuss becoming a lecturer at a university at this point. That is a totally different topic that does not belong here. Just revise the content to show the prompt requirements in relation to accounting for now. You need to clean up the discussion in your essay and the best way to do it is by focusing on the correct masters degree course first.