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Help me to review and improve my essay of why you have selected your chosen three university courses



Mahmoud Hussien 2 / 3  
Nov 5, 2016   #1
Outline why you have selected your chosen three university courses, and explain how this relates to your previous academic or professional experience and your plans for the future.

My Answer

I selected the same course (Operation and Supply chain Management) at three different universities (Bath University, Newcastle University, and University of Liverpool) for the following reasons:

To get effective productivity outcome from people, we should put everyone in his right place that matches with his willing, ambitions, and abilities. That's what I did for myself, I am willing to work in business field at the same time I love the industries, one of the most beautiful moments of my life when I be in factory and watching the flows of producing the product.

Through my working in real life and my Postgraduate studies (Business Administration Diploma and Pre-master of Business Administration) I got useful knowledge about different fields belong to business administration. But the operation field attracted my attention more, after go deeper into this field by studying the Stevenson book of Operation (in pre-master), and online courses (Coursera.org), I found that this field will help me to be completely satisfied because this field combines the business and industry.

So, I have already started to shift my career to operation and supply chain management and I train in supply chain planning at Mid-care (Nivea-Egypt) Company as a first step in my shifting career plan, and I decided to make my dissertation in Operation and Supply Chain Management at Cairo University before I hear about Chevening, and it was one of my dreams to hold my Master's Degree from UK.

That's the most suitable time to me to hold the master's degree in Operation and Supply Chain Management for two main reasons:
- It will qualify and support me in my future career path of supply chain to work as supply chain manager/director (middle term Plan)

- It's a main stepping stone to hold PhD Degree.

Here are my clarification about why I chose this specific Universities:

University of Bath (MSc in Operations, Logistics and Supply Chain Management):
- Ranked as 1st for business studies 2016.
- Two-semester practicum, it help me to apply the theoretical and take the opportunity to work with a client to solve a real business challenge.

- The program of "Global Residencies", that's allow me to get the experience of multinational organizations.

Newcastle University (Operations, Logistics and Supply Chain Management MSc):
- Ranked as 16th in the UK, Top 1% of world university
- The modules will provide me by all knowledge that's will help and support me in my future career path.
- They arrange an industry visit and invite guest speakers from industry to share their experiences, to link between the theoretical and practical.

University of Liverpool (Operation and Supply Chain Management):
- Ranked as 27th in the UK.
- They arrange an industry visit and invite guest speakers from industry.
- They offer the opportunity to apply the knowledge by undertaking a work base project which is undertaken in conjunction with industry. Recent projects have been undertaken in collaboration with organizations including Bibby Distribution, Ford Motor Company, Hewlett Packard and Jaguar Land Rover.

Malikos 2 / 3  
Nov 5, 2016   #2
@Mahmoud Hussein: I can clearly understand from your essay that you have prompt reasons for choosing those universities. However, here are some feedbacks that I'd like you to take into consideration:

1/ Do get rid of the first paragraph, since in my opinion it is senseless and takes only words counts.
2/ Do synthesize the each university reasons in a smooth concise paragraph, rather than bullet points.
Best of luck :)
.


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