how proposed study contribute to your career?
The proposed study will have a vast impact on my professional career in the future. With the qualifications that I will get from the proposed course, I will be able to join the Timorese government and/or non-government institutions that work in the field of economy to help reduce poverty, unemployment and raising standards of living. By joining these institutions, I will seek to work as an economist or economic policy developer, carefully integrating the knowledge that I will learn from this course into a real-life context.
Through the practical and theoretical economic studies offered by this course such as applied econometrics for economics and finance, economic policy and practice, economics strategies for business etc. I will be able to develop a comprehensive understanding of the economy and be able to apply it to Timor-Leste's economy and its strategies to grow by able to identify issues and propose detailed solutions supported by evidence such as economic models, trends and theories.
Professionalism matters in the workforce and through the Work Integrated Learning program (WIL) offered by this course as part of its structure, I will be able to join various Australian firms to experience and develop professionalism in the field. In addition, with the nature of this course being a complex matter, It will be able to help me to enhance my professional career by strengthening the criteria that I lack in such as critical thinking and analytical skills.
In summary, with the academic experience, skills and knowledge that I will attain from this course, I will develop a strong professional framework and accreditation that will fully allow me to prepare to work in Timor-Leste's challenging and dynamic economic circumstances.
Holt Educational Consultant - / 11,210 3650
Kindly remove the "etc." reference in the essay as that removes the academic formality of your response. In order to maintain an academic tone, no short cut language should be used in the paragraphs and sentences. This will assure the reviewer of proper respect and a recognition of his authority on your part.
As far as I can tell, you have proposed the future of your career based on academic standards for the workplace. There is no personal career goal discussion and a personal interest in the study. It is this lack of passion in your writing when it comes to your career development that makes the essay boring to read. It sounds more like you memorized the course curriculum and duties and responsibilities listing of job openings at your office rather than you giving a personal analysis of your career direction, growth, and personal interest in completing both.
Consider the following:
- Your professional goals
- Your academic needs in relation to that goal
- Your path going forward after completing your studies
All of these need to be presented as a solid career plan rather than an enumeration of possible duties and responsibilities as you have now. Focus on specific targets that you hope to truly contribute and participate in then relate the studies back to those.
@Abl steven Hi, let's me to add some feedback.
first of all, as there is a limited word in the essays, you should minimise the flow of your essays without eliminating the main meaning. for example, you can just delete "The proposed study will ...", and directly start your answers.
"I will be able to join the Timorese government ..." >> which institution will you join? you have to be specific here. and how is the strategy to reduce the poverty? please elaborate on your practical steps to do it, not just being rhetorical.
be able to apply it to Timor-Leste's economy and .... >> I have no idea about this, please rewrite it with understandable sentences. plus, please mention the Timor Leste economic conditions
you have to note that being specific, bold, brief, and feasible is a must in writing this kind of essay.
Best of luck with your application!