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'from Bangladesh' + 'Sociology' + 'Life in Namibia' - NYU supplement



Rocomo 2 / 6  
Dec 14, 2011   #1
HIII!!! Please help with my supplement essays. Be as critical as you want! I'm REALLY hopeful on NYU so any help will be much appreciated! THANK YOU!!!

Why NYU?

Although I can't remember much from when I lived in New York City at the age of 7, there is one thing I can never forget, seeing 'NYU'. As a new comer from Bangladesh, I was awestruck by the vibrant and bustling city. As my mother guided me through the intricate streets and avenues, I was content aimlessly following her through the city with my packet of roasted peanuts, inhaling every bit of the city life. As we walked through the streets, bright violet purple banners began appearing with the image of the Statue of Liberty's torch and the boldly stated letters 'NYU'. As we sat in Washington Square Park, my mother explained the meaning of NYU and after that, I just remember wishing I could remain there for as long as time would allow me. Even though I left New York after 3 years, as I grew older and began looking deeper into places where I could further my education, there was no doubt in my mind that NYU was where I wanted to grow, where I wanted to return, where I belonged. NYU is not only recommended as one of the world's best educational institutions, NYU melts together an eclectic group of knowledgeable students while maintaining their originality. With an outstanding faculty, a diverse group of students, a great athletic department, plenty of opportunities within the city and a 'Global Network University', NYU is the perfect choice for any student with ambitions and be rest assured that they will accomplish more than they set out for. The 7 year old me had made a promise to my mother when she asked me when I'm older, to walk the streets of New York City as an NYU student. And now I'm here to fulfill those wishes.

Regardless of whether or not you have an intended major or concentration, please elaborate on an academic area of interest and how you wish to explore it at NYU's campuses in New York or Abu Dhabi or at one of our global academic centers around the world. Please share any activities or experiences you have had that have cultivated your intellectual interests leading you to choose to study at the NYU campus of your choice.

Sociology was a very vague topic to me before; however after discovering the Sociology department in NYU's New York campus, I knew that I was meant to be there. I was initially introduced to sociology from following my mother into the UNICEF office after the end of every school day from a very young age. Even now, I listen to her, intrigued, every time she explains the significance of gender and family issues, social theory and policy, and the role of welfare and education in societies. My interest in sociology was emphasized further through my love for history and the evaluation of literature in school. My eyes were opened to the history of cultures and societies as well as the historical development of human society. I touched on different modes of living, various stages of past social cultures through historical analysis and studies of ancient customs of living. Also through works such as 'Raisin in the Sun', 'Letter From a Birmingham Jail', 'Les Miserables' and others mirrored the result of politics, society, economics, human behavior and condition in the given time and place. Ranked as one of the top 15 U.S universities for sociology, I feel that by studying at NYU's New York campus, I will receive the tools I require to develop my understanding of various aspects of sociology. Not only is New York City a rich cultural and social environment, NYU allows me to broaden my knowledge by allowing me the freedom to experiment with various subjects. NYU's diverse methods of study, modern research techniques, and a faculty consisting of experts from areas of law to social policy, my desires to makes sense of the world around me will not only be satisfied but also stimulate me to learn about issues from a variety of perspectives.

What intrigues you? Tell us about one work of art, scientific achievement, piece of literature, method of communication, or place in the world (a film, book, performance, website, event, location, etc.), and explain its significance to you.

Living in Namibia for over 6 years, Namibia's coastal line from the 2 minor cities, Swakopmund to Walvis Bay, never fails to fascinate me. Namibia has an area of 824, 292 sq km and of this, a distance of 19 miles is enough to take your breath away. As you drive from one city to the other, you get engulfed by the beauty of the perfectly sculpted sand dunes and the salty cold waves of the raging Atlantic ocean joining together to present a view that only seems possible in a painter's wildest imagination. The natural beauty queens compete for attention as you drive down the thin strip of tar. I always wondered how, on one side, stood the simplistic and pure sand dunes created from the softest of sand, each dune of a different size and form placed perfectly on the giant's sandbox. And on the other side, a wave of blinding, light blue crystals crashed onto the shore and used her charm to pull everything back into her realm. Every year, I return to this strip of serenity and allow all my troubles to be washed away by the currents and cleansed by the every single grain of sand. The fighting waves of the sea remind me of my battles, and the mountains of sand of every obstacle I need to overcome, which fuse together to create a beautiful journey and deliver me to my final destination.

danigreenhouse 3 / 6  
Dec 14, 2011   #2
I think your essays are good!!

This sentence:

Living in Namibia for over 6 years, Namibia's coastal line from the 2 minor cities, Swakopmund to Walvis Bay, never fails to fascinate me

Doesn't flow particularly well...is it the bay that never fails to fascinate, or living there??
Other than that, well done and good luck!!!
OP Rocomo 2 / 6  
Dec 15, 2011   #3
Thank you sooooooooooooo much for the help!
OP Rocomo 2 / 6  
Dec 15, 2011   #4
Any more advice...please help?
lee235717 - / 16  
Dec 18, 2011   #5
Your essays seem pretty good, but your first essay focuses too much on the city environment. Focusing on the city is too common. There has to be something more. Also, you want to show how you will contribute to NYU.
lee235717 - / 16  
Dec 19, 2011   #6
I also have to add that your third essay does not show why you would fit into NYU. It actually looks as if it would be better for you to go to a college in a rural area.
faux_soup 3 / 7  
Dec 20, 2011   #7
Your writing is really good!!

If there was one thing I could say, I agree with lee. I feel like your first essay focuses too much on New York and the cityscape. Explain this statement more: "as I grew older and began looking deeper into places where I could further my education, there was no doubt in my mind that NYU was where I wanted to grow, where I wanted to return, where I belonged". Try to make it more personal.

good luck!!
mukhia08 7 / 22  
Dec 21, 2011   #8
its really good, best of luck!
OP Rocomo 2 / 6  
Dec 23, 2011   #9
Thank you for all the help! I'll definitely work on the suggestions!!!


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