Any comments would be very appreciated! Please be VERY critical, be harsh! I need all the analysis I can get to make this essay not sound so awkward and cheesy.
Write an essay in which you tell us about someone who has made an impact on your life and explain how and why this person is important to you.
These past three years have been three of the roughest years of my life, three years ago in April I lost a very close friend of mine. We had been best friends since eighth grade year. I was always the shy and quiet girl no one really noticed, while Brandon was the kind of person everyone wanted to get to know. He was a very interesting person. To everyone, he was just a person you thought you knew. He reached out to me in search of a friend. I had the honor of becoming his best friend.
In the summer before our sophomore year, we did not know that this would be the last summer we would spend together; I had decided that I wanted to join the Cross Country team. Brandon thought it was a ridiculous idea, he knew how uncoordinated I was. Even though he thought it was ridiculous, he asked me what time he needed to be over the next morning. I told him around 7 a.m. so we could get a head start on running. Now, we could not drive then, we were still too young. Luckily, he only lived three miles from my house. I remember waking up at around 6:45 because I heard a knock on my door, I looked out the window and Brandon was standing there ready to go. I could not believe it he kept his word. We ran a few miles and then he walked home. We never ran in the mornings ever again, but that was one of the sweetest things anyone has ever done for me.
That is a memory I will never forget of Brandon. I have never had a dearer or sweeter friend than he. Then that April came. The day I will never forget and have in my memory for the rest of eternity the day of the accident. I was at home doing homework, it was an hour after school had ended, and I received a phone call from my cousin. She sounded like she had been crying and I felt a twinge of panic rush over me. She had then told me that Brandon and another friend had been mudding near the lake and they lost control of the car. They both had been killed. I was in shock; I had just seen him that morning and afternoon at school. How could this be possible? I sat in my room and cried, as the world seemed to turn black.
After the funeral, I stayed around the gravesite for a while longer just so it could be Brandon and me. I never had the chance to say good-bye I needed to say good-bye. I sat there with him and talked, talked about everything going on. I closed my eyes and I told him how I missed him, and I could not understand how this happened. Then I tried remembering all the good times I had with him just the two of us. I felt warm and comforted while I sat there and talked to him about it. I felt like he was actually there listening back and I almost forgot that he was not there, until I opened my eyes. Then reality was back and I was alone. The next few months went by slowly, and summer only went by more slowly. Things did get better though, I started to focus more on studying and school work. It helped pass the days and I kept so busy that before I knew it, my senior year had come.
It had been over a year since Brandon had passed away, and I was finally starting to get my life back in gear. Brandon was my inspiration to better my self at life and school. I joined theater class, and did a play. I started to make new friends and I was enjoying life again. I still visited Brandon's grave often. Almost every chance I got. Through all of my success' Brandon was never far from my mind. I had him to thank for making me strive to do my best and to work for everything I wanted. He had made me stronger, by pushing through all of the pain, I gained new responsibilities and I gained a guardian angel.
Write an essay in which you tell us about someone who has made an impact on your life and explain how and why this person is important to you.
These past three years have been three of the roughest years of my life, three years ago in April I lost a very close friend of mine. We had been best friends since eighth grade year. I was always the shy and quiet girl no one really noticed, while Brandon was the kind of person everyone wanted to get to know. He was a very interesting person. To everyone, he was just a person you thought you knew. He reached out to me in search of a friend. I had the honor of becoming his best friend.
In the summer before our sophomore year, we did not know that this would be the last summer we would spend together; I had decided that I wanted to join the Cross Country team. Brandon thought it was a ridiculous idea, he knew how uncoordinated I was. Even though he thought it was ridiculous, he asked me what time he needed to be over the next morning. I told him around 7 a.m. so we could get a head start on running. Now, we could not drive then, we were still too young. Luckily, he only lived three miles from my house. I remember waking up at around 6:45 because I heard a knock on my door, I looked out the window and Brandon was standing there ready to go. I could not believe it he kept his word. We ran a few miles and then he walked home. We never ran in the mornings ever again, but that was one of the sweetest things anyone has ever done for me.
That is a memory I will never forget of Brandon. I have never had a dearer or sweeter friend than he. Then that April came. The day I will never forget and have in my memory for the rest of eternity the day of the accident. I was at home doing homework, it was an hour after school had ended, and I received a phone call from my cousin. She sounded like she had been crying and I felt a twinge of panic rush over me. She had then told me that Brandon and another friend had been mudding near the lake and they lost control of the car. They both had been killed. I was in shock; I had just seen him that morning and afternoon at school. How could this be possible? I sat in my room and cried, as the world seemed to turn black.
After the funeral, I stayed around the gravesite for a while longer just so it could be Brandon and me. I never had the chance to say good-bye I needed to say good-bye. I sat there with him and talked, talked about everything going on. I closed my eyes and I told him how I missed him, and I could not understand how this happened. Then I tried remembering all the good times I had with him just the two of us. I felt warm and comforted while I sat there and talked to him about it. I felt like he was actually there listening back and I almost forgot that he was not there, until I opened my eyes. Then reality was back and I was alone. The next few months went by slowly, and summer only went by more slowly. Things did get better though, I started to focus more on studying and school work. It helped pass the days and I kept so busy that before I knew it, my senior year had come.
It had been over a year since Brandon had passed away, and I was finally starting to get my life back in gear. Brandon was my inspiration to better my self at life and school. I joined theater class, and did a play. I started to make new friends and I was enjoying life again. I still visited Brandon's grave often. Almost every chance I got. Through all of my success' Brandon was never far from my mind. I had him to thank for making me strive to do my best and to work for everything I wanted. He had made me stronger, by pushing through all of the pain, I gained new responsibilities and I gained a guardian angel.