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College Choice - quality and necessary improvements of my study permit essay for Canada



Doel Hasan 1 / 3  
Mar 28, 2017   #1

My College Choice



Since the age of 14 I have fostered an affinity towards 3d motion pictures along with interactive software like 3d video games and the professional content creation software used to create these entertainment mediums. As a result, I have conducted extensive research about my interests in order to find the possible career prospects I can attain in future when I grow up. Consequently, I finally concluded that I would become a 3d content creator and animator when it is time for me to choose a career. I have been using such animation software as a hobby ever since I had this mind set. It gives me great joy to create various 3d animation projects using these software and provides me with knowledge and experience which I can easily transfer to my profession later in life.

Considering all these factors, I took the initiative to plan and investigate the kind of education I had to receive which would enable me to convert my hobby into an occupation. I did this because I believe having proper education is the most vital component contributing to a person's success, whether it be in their career or any other social and professional activity in life. So I planned to study and work hard to get good grades which will allow me to an admission in a prominent college or university in my country and study computer graphics on the 3d animation department. But the dilemma with my plan is, as I later found out, that though their is extensive establishments of computer technology in the educational and commercial sectors in my country, their is still insignificant involvement of the education department in teaching the usage of 3d computer graphics to produce digital contents for the entertainment and digital communication mediums (such as television shows, advertisements etc) in my country. This is unfortunate as this is my primary field of study for becoming a 3d animator and graphics designer. But whats interesting is that many established national film studios, graphics production and mass media companies has noticed this lack of quality on their products and has taken steps to try to alleviate this problem for a few years now. They have hired foreign workers and teachers to train and educate the workforce about the new and improved tools and techniques. Also many computer engineers have been sent abroad to study in the field of advanced 3d animation and graphics design, so that in future after their return they would heighten the quality and integrity of our entertainment and media industry to an international standard. As a result, gradually the career opportunities on this field is increasing and becoming more lucrative. But currently there is very little formal education such as college diploma and university degrees on this subjects in my country. For these reasons, I have searched for an suitable institute in a foreign country to do my further studies on 3d animation and graphics design after finishing my O' level examinations.

So after many searches of my own and various suggestions from my teachers, my friends and relatives (some who are residing abroad), I decided that I would study in Canada. There are many good reasons for choosing Canada but there are few important ones that I would like to specifically mention. Firstly, Canada is a developed country (unlike my country which is still considered a developing country) with substantial advancements in the field of education and technology. As a result, Canada has some of the most finest colleges and universities providing reliable and top-notch education and their education quality is recognized internationally. So I believe studying in Canadian institute will ensure I get the best possible education on my subject and will allow me to achieve my dream of becoming a properly trained 3d animation artist and be able to take advantage of the growing industry on this particular field by applying for good jobs in my country. Another compelling reason is that, Canada's population consists of people from various countries, cultures and believes compared to my country (which has a population of mostly bengali people). This will give me a great opportunity to meet and interact with people from all over the world. This experience will give me valuble insight and knowledge about the lives, habits and behaviors of these people with different tradition from my own, which will make me a more sociable person and teach me how to communicate better with various kind of people within my community.

As for my choice of college, I have chosen Mohawk College as it has all the above qualities that I have mentioned above as my reasons for visiting Canada for further education. Mohawk college's Animation 3D course which is an Ontario College Advanced Diploma is a very suitable program for me. It will teach me all the fundamentals of design softwares required to do basic to intermediate 3d animation tasks at first and throughout the duration of the program, teach me various advanced methods of using the software for 3d content creation. Aside from three dimensional art, the program will also teach me traditional 2d drawing for creating advanced story-boarding (this is a process of drawing things on paper for planning and prototyping ideas before doing 3d projects on computer). Moreover, the program also includes topics on business strategies for computer graphics artists which teaches how make sustainable income and find suitable jobs effectively.

frenchfries 7 / 18  
Mar 29, 2017   #2
Hi, I think your essay is okay, but the problem is you do not have a good sentence to conclude your essay. You are telling and listing some benefits of your chosen school. So you should have concluding sentence.

I also do not understand what ''the most finest colleges''.
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 15470  
Mar 29, 2017   #3
Mehedi, you are wasting too much space on unwarranted information in this essay. There are only 2 points that your essay should focus on. The reason why you want to study in Canada and why you chose Mohawk College to apply to. The convincing points for your academic desire to go to Canada must be represented by your familiarity with the ability of Canadian colleges and universities to educate their students to become world class professionals. Do not belittle your country in the essay instead, use your country as the inspiration for your desire to study abroad. Explain how your industry will benefit from your training abroad. Rather than telling the consul what you hope to learn at the university, detail how you plan to go back to your country to help improve the field of 3D animation and technology there. The point of this essay is to convince the visa officer that you will not be staying in Canada longer than you have to after you graduate. So make your intention to return him upon graduating clear in your essay. You also need to detail how you will be paying for college and how you will sustain your expenses as a student while in Canada. Make sure that you imply that you do not plan to break the laws of the country when you get there and that you will make sure to only work within the parameters of your student visa.
OP Doel Hasan 1 / 3  
Mar 29, 2017   #4
First of all thank you Holt and frenchfries for your advice.

I understand your concerns Holt that i am under undermining my country, but you have to understand is that the things I said that my country lacks are true. My country has little to no education on 3d computer graphics. I researched extensively. And if their was I would not want to leave my country in the first place. It is my dream to create these digital entertainment and my country has been developing the job market with necessary tools and software on this field for a few years. Most of all I want to establish my skills and ability on my country rather than improve the technology that my country already has. I am an artist and I want to use the existing software and tools to create art and entertainment. Not modify the technology as I don't want to be an engineer. Studying abroad is the only way to achieve my goal. Please help me improve my essay.

P.S. My country is Bangladesh. I am 16+ years old. I have competed my O level with A grade on 5 subjects and A* on 3 subjects.

P.S. My agent has already collected and formatted all my financial prove documents to show my payment plans. Do I need to mention it again in the essay ?


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