Hey!
I originally used this essay as my UC essay 1, but my college advisor suggested I use it for my common app essay as well. On that note, any suggestions/ edits would be greatly appreciated!
Thanks!
It's a Saturday afternoon in the Edelman household, yet it sounds more like a football game. There are at least fifteen kids of many ages running around the house, playing board games, talking, laughing or eating. To the outsider it must seem strange - there are also four adults sitting in the living room, calmly talking as chaos ensues around them. Yet, to the insider, it is completely normal.
My family is large to begin with - I am the eldest of five children. What sets my family apart, though, is the way it has been extended to so many others in our community. My siblings and I all bring home at least two friends after synagogue on Saturday, and many times kids come on their own accord. My parents don't set the table in advance because they never quite know how many people will be eating until they count up, and everyone helps set up for lunch. Lunch is a spirited affair; often times it is necessary to yell to be heard above the incessant chatter and loud laughter, but it is all part of the experience of being with my family.
The observance of Saturday Shabbat is a break from the monotony of the work week and is a valued Jewish practice. It allows us to maintain a balance between the secular and religious, the professional and the personal. This ability to balance is a quality that both my parents exhibit. My father works long hours as the Chief Investment Officer of his firm; he wakes up every morning at four, and comes home at six in the evening to his family. My mother not only juggles driving five kids to different activities every day, but is also the president of the board of directors of the elementary and middle school that my siblings attend. They are busy adults. Then, after a long week of work, they welcome into our home at least fifteen kids, ten of whom are not their own, and provide them with lunch, snacks, games, and more. They do all of this without complaint, and have succeeded in raising five children who are all healthy and happy.
This sense of balance, the ability to take seemingly opposite forces - secular and religious, professional and personal - and mesh them together into a cohesive unit is something that I admire and I will continue to work hard to achieve. I have many goals for my secular life: I want to receive a stellar college education, work hard and go to graduate school, and succeed there and enter into the professional world, doing something I enjoy, something that challenges me, something rewarding. But I need to remember to keep the rest of my life in balance as well. I want to raise a healthy, happy family. One day, I hope my house will be as loud, boisterous, and full as my parent's house is on a Saturday afternoon.
I originally used this essay as my UC essay 1, but my college advisor suggested I use it for my common app essay as well. On that note, any suggestions/ edits would be greatly appreciated!
Thanks!
It's a Saturday afternoon in the Edelman household, yet it sounds more like a football game. There are at least fifteen kids of many ages running around the house, playing board games, talking, laughing or eating. To the outsider it must seem strange - there are also four adults sitting in the living room, calmly talking as chaos ensues around them. Yet, to the insider, it is completely normal.
My family is large to begin with - I am the eldest of five children. What sets my family apart, though, is the way it has been extended to so many others in our community. My siblings and I all bring home at least two friends after synagogue on Saturday, and many times kids come on their own accord. My parents don't set the table in advance because they never quite know how many people will be eating until they count up, and everyone helps set up for lunch. Lunch is a spirited affair; often times it is necessary to yell to be heard above the incessant chatter and loud laughter, but it is all part of the experience of being with my family.
The observance of Saturday Shabbat is a break from the monotony of the work week and is a valued Jewish practice. It allows us to maintain a balance between the secular and religious, the professional and the personal. This ability to balance is a quality that both my parents exhibit. My father works long hours as the Chief Investment Officer of his firm; he wakes up every morning at four, and comes home at six in the evening to his family. My mother not only juggles driving five kids to different activities every day, but is also the president of the board of directors of the elementary and middle school that my siblings attend. They are busy adults. Then, after a long week of work, they welcome into our home at least fifteen kids, ten of whom are not their own, and provide them with lunch, snacks, games, and more. They do all of this without complaint, and have succeeded in raising five children who are all healthy and happy.
This sense of balance, the ability to take seemingly opposite forces - secular and religious, professional and personal - and mesh them together into a cohesive unit is something that I admire and I will continue to work hard to achieve. I have many goals for my secular life: I want to receive a stellar college education, work hard and go to graduate school, and succeed there and enter into the professional world, doing something I enjoy, something that challenges me, something rewarding. But I need to remember to keep the rest of my life in balance as well. I want to raise a healthy, happy family. One day, I hope my house will be as loud, boisterous, and full as my parent's house is on a Saturday afternoon.