Hi everyone! This was an essay I wrote for my UC application. I really liked this, even though it doesn't have that much substance. I'm probably going to use it as a supplemental essay for the Common app but I want to make it stronger. I'd really appreciate it if you can help me with that, and with anything else, of course. Thank you all in advance!!
UC Prompt #2: Tell us about a personal quality, talent, accomplishment, contribution or experience that is important to you. What about this quality or accomplishment makes you proud, and how does it relate to the person you are?
"Grandma, I think I'm dying."
It's hard to understand death, let alone accept it, when you're only five years old. I did not expect that consequence at all before I consciously swallowed my first apple seed.
"You're not dying," she assured me.
Not convinced, I urged Grandma to prove it. Thus she introduced me to the children's biology section at the local bookstore. I remember listening to Grandma as she read my first plant book from cover to cover before I finally believed her.
I have always been known as the inquisitive girl with a reputation of taking matters into her own hands.
At times this meant trimming my bangs to the shape of ocean waves or restoring my favorite mechanical pencils back to working condition. Sometimes the results are favorable, other times, not so great. Although I did manage to fix some of my mechanical pencils, my bangs were a lost cause. Shocked that I'd even attempt something so ridiculous, Grandma unforgivingly snipped off most of my bangs. And despite my resentment at going to school with ugly, one-inch bangs, I don't regret having tried to cut my hair in a unique way.
I do not strive to limit myself to do only what others consider acceptable or sensible and I am not easily discouraged. Some people call my behavior disobedient when I question what my elders say. Some call it irrational when I waste time pondering the questions no one can answer. Some call it stubborn when I don't give in without being 100% sure. I disagree. I treasure my characteristics and I have come to appreciate the freedom my family has give me to ask questions.
It's been a while since apple seeds were on my agenda. Now I am wondering, how can we cure psoriasis? What can we do to motivate students to take their education more seriously? How can we improve the quality and efficiency of local transportation? How can we engineer battery-independent, solar laptops?
I know that one day, we will find the answer to all of these questions. But I want to take part in this phenomenon. My love for discovery feeds my hunger.
UC Prompt #2: Tell us about a personal quality, talent, accomplishment, contribution or experience that is important to you. What about this quality or accomplishment makes you proud, and how does it relate to the person you are?
"Grandma, I think I'm dying."
It's hard to understand death, let alone accept it, when you're only five years old. I did not expect that consequence at all before I consciously swallowed my first apple seed.
"You're not dying," she assured me.
Not convinced, I urged Grandma to prove it. Thus she introduced me to the children's biology section at the local bookstore. I remember listening to Grandma as she read my first plant book from cover to cover before I finally believed her.
I have always been known as the inquisitive girl with a reputation of taking matters into her own hands.
At times this meant trimming my bangs to the shape of ocean waves or restoring my favorite mechanical pencils back to working condition. Sometimes the results are favorable, other times, not so great. Although I did manage to fix some of my mechanical pencils, my bangs were a lost cause. Shocked that I'd even attempt something so ridiculous, Grandma unforgivingly snipped off most of my bangs. And despite my resentment at going to school with ugly, one-inch bangs, I don't regret having tried to cut my hair in a unique way.
I do not strive to limit myself to do only what others consider acceptable or sensible and I am not easily discouraged. Some people call my behavior disobedient when I question what my elders say. Some call it irrational when I waste time pondering the questions no one can answer. Some call it stubborn when I don't give in without being 100% sure. I disagree. I treasure my characteristics and I have come to appreciate the freedom my family has give me to ask questions.
It's been a while since apple seeds were on my agenda. Now I am wondering, how can we cure psoriasis? What can we do to motivate students to take their education more seriously? How can we improve the quality and efficiency of local transportation? How can we engineer battery-independent, solar laptops?
I know that one day, we will find the answer to all of these questions. But I want to take part in this phenomenon. My love for discovery feeds my hunger.
