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EDUCATION IS IMPORTANT TO ME - Stanford essay:what matters to me and why


Ro4 9 / 21  
Nov 28, 2013   #1
After all is said and done, a person's family would always be there for him or her. No matter how dysfunctional a family is, its members would always love each other. We can always call on our family in our time of need. For this reason among a multitude of reasons, my family is the most important thing in the whole wide world for me.

Even though my family is the most important thing to me, I do not downplay the importance of friends in my life. No man is an island. I cannot live on an island alone with my family, without any friends. It is important to have people your own with whom to share experiences, jokes, fears, aspirations and so on.

Plato once said, "Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle." I try to live by this philosophy. I realized early on that it is very important to be nice to people. Helping others either with a kind word, a smile, a tutor, or with cash goes a long way to lighten a person's burdens. This in itself is a blessing.

Last but not the least, education is important to me. Through school, I've been able to learn so much: math, English, economics, French, geography and social studies. This has expanded my mind and my knowledge base. Without education, I'd probably have been a domestically abused mother of two by now. So yes! Education matters to me and I cannot wait for my impending college adventure when my mind would be further broadened.
Pahan 1 / 1,906 553  
Nov 28, 2013   #2
After all is said and done, a person's family would always be there for him or her. No matter how dysfunctional a family is, its members would always love each other. We can always call on our family in our time of need. For this reason among a multitude of reasons, my family is the most important thing in the whole wide world for me.

I feel you need to improve this paragraph a lot. There's a lot of redundancy in your ideas. Also, it is not presented creatively. Rather than saying those obvious things that everybody knows in general, tell them why you consider that your family comes before everything else to you. Have yourself in the middle and tell why they matter to you. You need to adopt the same approach for friends and education too.


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