If you could help just check it over for me for simple mistakes or revisions that I may have missed I would GREATLY appreciate it! If you have any suggestions or critiques PLEASE let me know!!! THX!
"Integrity, scholarship, community, creativity, and excellence," not only do these words form the UCF creed, but they are the values that I strive to uphold daily. Many say that I have a "good" heart, which I interpret as my concern and love for others. When I enter into a new setting not only do I evaluate how I can improve myself, but how I can enhance the community around me. I desire to make a change, positively affect as many lives as possible, and create profound memories and legacies throughout my college years. I come from a family who strongly believes in education, its foundation, and the success that it leads to. As a result it has been instilled within me that it is my obligation to live up to the full extent of my potential and to hone in on the skills and blessings, which have been given to me, to become a highly successful African American female. Over time I have learned that becoming successful is a task that is entirely left up to me and has to be desired from within. Even as a toddler my parents reinforced early education. They have a desire for me to achieve and experience things that they could only dream of. The many rights that my ancestors fought and died for are the very rights that I hold in my hands today and often take for granted. It is not only my mission but my duty as a young African American female to rise to the occasion. The time is now to stop making excuses and start taking action.
I have also learned to value family. No matter how hard times get or how heavy the strain that is put on our family ties, we are expected to stick together and help each other overcome. Throughout this strong family bond we have been taught the aspects of love, respect, honor, and loyalty. Most of all, we depend on God from which all of our health and strength comes from. We acknowledge the fact that if it was not for the Lord we would not be here today enraptured in the many blessings He has bestowed upon us. We all realize that every breath is a gift from God that should not be expected nor demanded but received out of appreciation and gratitude.
I strive to make a make a positive impact so that I can not only uphold the morals and values that have been instilled upon me, but also to honor my family name. I realize that everything I do and say is not only a reflection of my physical family, but a reflection of my fellow spiritual family as well. It is my duty as a young, black, Christian, female to set the par for others and to be a leading example to those who are lost in the world and are looking for a way. I am more than ready to open a new chapter and set out for the college road ahead of me.
"Integrity, scholarship, community, creativity, excellence." Not ..."
"...hone inon the skills and blessings which have been given to me to become a highly..."
I am assuming you choose to reply to the second prompt. As such, your answer is a strong response to it. Your voice is strong, the content is well organized, and it flows nicely. Good work.