Why do you want to study your chosen major at Georgia Tech
,
and how do you think Georgia Tech will prepare you to pursue opportunities in that field after graduation?(250)
I have accidentally used over 250 words..
I perceive architecture as an art that leaves a permanent mark in history. A mark that is not of buildings, but what is created by an idiosyncratic individual that shows timelessness and practicality. Sadly, many do not see the impact architecture has had in history, as I was one of many. However, from discovering architecture in elementary school to the present, I have become fond of it and would like to construct my mark that would convey architecture to modern society.
As a resident of Georgia, I have definitely heard and researched about Georgia Tech. As one of the highest rated schools for architecture, I am allured by its vision of offering the highest education a school can offer. By offering exceptional programs, like its study abroad programs in Europe and Asia, I can become inspired by different cultures and history that I have never seen from my naked eye or by hands-on experience. I am very eager that I can study how as changes occur in society, architecture seems to reveal its commonplace in many cultures. Georgia Tech School of Architecture and its study abroad programs are a crucial key in further developing my desire to create a better world, and to have this opportunity to design and create what can reflect on modern society is what I indubitably want to pursue in my life.
I know it will be tough after graduation with overwhelming pressure upon my back, however, I will not hesitate to take on difficult projects throughout my college years. For I know that through constant practice and studying at one of the top architecture colleges, I can have viable and innovative solutions. I have heard how challenging Georgia Tech will be from its first year all the way to its graduate school, however, as diamond forms under constant pressure, I will become an architect that will leave a mark inspiring the current and future generations.
... art that leave a ... is not of buildings but what it is created ...
Sadly, many people do not see the impact of architecture that has had in history. as I was one of many.
..., I have definitely heard ...
... by its vision of in offering ... education for a school can offer.
... programs like its study abroad ... , I can become ...
I am very eager that I can to study about how society ...
..., I will design and ... society that is what I ...
For From I know,...
Notes :
- Try to add more your vocabulary to avoid repetition
- Be careful with complex sentences
- Some words are missing or not suitable
Good luck
Holt Educational Consultant - / 14,835 
4783 Joseph, you have written a very good response to the prompt. You don't need to edit anything with regards to your grammar presentation because this is not an English exam. Your presentation is alright, understandable, and properly written. The only problem it has is that you are over the word count. A problem that can easily be corrected by removing the first paragraph of the current version, starting the essay instead on the second paragraph. The second paragraph is more direct to the point and moves the essay along in a brisk manner. You should also revise the last paragraph. Remove the first 2 sentences. Expand the explanation of the last sentence though. Cut it up into individual sentences instead of one long sentence. You can discuss specific programs you look forward to participating in and why you believe the activity will be vital to your education and training as a future architect.
