Integrating my love for biology and engineering - Which Department in MIT?

I am currently debating between two versions of my essay. Any input will be welcomed!

Although you may not yet know what you want to major in, which department or program at MIT appeals to you and why?

Integrating my love for biology and engineering, Course 20 will allow me to experience and participate in programs such as iGEM through UROPs and IAP so that I can learn by doing hands-on research on protein engineering. MIT has a wealth of resources that I can utilize to widen my horizons on synthetic biology and actualize my project ideas to make a difference.

Additionally, by providing students opportunities to sit in seminars and listen to talks given by visiting scholars, MIT is the place for me to study not only BE, but other disciplines of sciences as well.

Or

while (starlinks.status() == adMITted){
By enrolling in Course 20, I will learn to apply my experiences and knowledge of biology to engineer technology that is salutary for humans around the globe like Greg Tao ('10)'s OttoClave or Swanson ('69)'s Genentech. Aside from the rigorous curriculum, MIT will provide the resources for me to pursue my interests through UROPs or activities during IAP such as iGEM and protein engineering projects.

I also hope to explore MIT's HASS curriculums to continue my passion for creative writing by majoring in Course 21W, explore more about the integration of CS in biology through Course 6-7, and, of course, get my pirates certificate through the swashbuckling PE department.

}

Also, how may I improve upon the essay? Thank you for your help!

I like the content of your first essay, it shows your passion in the field you mentioned. However, you need to add something that will make your essay uniques. I'm sure that most of MIT applicants are passionate in academics and want to join UROP and IAP (well, including me :D). Maybe you can blend both of your essays, using your java-like opening for your first essay.

Good luck for us both :)

Should I do something like:

while (starlinks.status() == adMITted){
Integrating my love for biology and engineering, Course 20 will allow me to experience and participate in programs such as iGEM through UROPs and IAP so that I can learn by doing hands-on research on protein engineering. MIT has a wealth of resources that I can utilize to widen my horizons on synthetic biology and actualize my project ideas to make a difference.

Additionally, by providing students opportunities to sit in seminars and listen to talks given by visiting scholars, MIT is the place for me to study not only BE, but other disciplines of sciences as well.

}

Good luck to you too!