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'e-mail conversations with a student' - university of rochester supplement



volleyball09 11 / 12  
Dec 6, 2008   #1
Hi, can you please tell me whether i need to make any changes to this. the word limit is only 125 words, which is why i couldn't make it longer than it is now. thank you!

What makes the University of Rochester a good fit for you? In answering, identify your sources of information, including any conversations you've had with Rochester faculty, staff, students, or alumni.

Many factors have shaped my rationale as to why I deem the University of Rochester a good fit for me. Through my e-mail conversations with student Chris Biersanski, I learned that every student, regardless of what he or she chooses to major in, is encouraged to participate in some form of research. I consider this to be an exceptional quality of the University. Not only will independent research expand my thought process, but it will also prepare me for a career in medicine. Through another e-mail conversation with student Kellie IIeto, I have come to greatly appreciate Rochester's open curriculum. An open curriculum will enable me to explore my own interests and learn more efficiently. Lastly, Rochester's diversity will help to enrich my college experience.

srirams 2 / 6  
Dec 6, 2008   #2
These are things i think you should change:

Independent research will not only expand my thought process but also prepare me for a career in medicine.

The second sentence is a little hard to follow...make it more simple.

Other than that, i think its a decent answer =]
EF_Kevin 8 / 13052  
Dec 7, 2008   #3
Many factors shape my rationale for choosing the University of Rochester. Through my e-mail conversations with student Chris Biersanski, I learned that every student, regardless of his or her chosen major, is encouraged to participate in some form of research.

Excellent! Two email correspondences and a mention of diversity. Perhaps you can end with a fact about the diversity, like this:

Lastly, Rochester's diversity will help to enrich my college experience: XX% of students are from cultures other than...

You can do that if you have room before reaching the word limit. I took out a few words in my revision, above. Good luck!!
OP volleyball09 11 / 12  
Dec 7, 2008   #4
thank you so much! i really appreciate it!


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