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'my passion for the psychological studies' - SOP for UT undergrad Transfer



trina_ch93 2 / 2  
Feb 4, 2012   #1
I'm applying as a transfer student and wanting to study psychology. UT asks for a Statement of Purpose, I had such a difficult time deciding what to write about. I'm still having trouble with formatting it. I have written the first two paragraphs, I'm not too proud of it so I ask for your help on how I can make it better. I'm currently working on my third paragraph on why UT is the best option for me.

What do you guys think of what I have so far?

Several experiences have triggered my passion for the psychological studies. The first is the fact that a close member of my family is diagnosed with a developmental disorder. From a six-year-old's perspective, "being extra nice" to my "special" cousin was the hardest thing I was asked to do. I couldn't bring myself to accept that there are kids out there who simply don't like playing hopscotch or hide-and-seek. I disliked him for the longest time because in my mind, he was a "weirdo" for wanting to play alone and being intrigued by things that just didn't make sense, like the red plastic bottle cap he always seemed to carry around. As I got older however, I became more accepting of his condition when I learned that he had a disorder known as autism. I realized that society does not always accept what they cannot conceive, much like how I felt when I was younger.

Another experience was when a classmate of mine was hospitalized for drug abuse. It was a shock because she didn't fit the description of a drug user - she was attentive, outgoing, and very enthusiastic towards her studies. Why then, did she suffer from a seizure related to cocaine use? How did she manage to display such positive emotions and behavior despite using life-threatening drugs? My fascination regarding that event broadened my curiosity toward human behavior; I wanted to gain insight on why we choose to engage in certain activities despite knowing it's potential harm. I realized a career in Psychology was the right path for me since this field aims to answer this and so many other questions related to the human psyche.

skeleton_kid - / 3  
Feb 4, 2012   #2
You could begin the essay by describing that time when your friend was hospitalized for drug abuse.( what you saw, how you felt, your reactions) Throughout the essay you could show how that influenced/ inspired you to study psychology. Or you could use your cousin as an example. be creative!
Vinny_Pooh 3 / 7  
Feb 4, 2012   #3
I couldn't bring myself to accept that there are kids out there who simply
possibly Re-word to: I couldn't accept the fact that there existed kids who...

I disliked him for the longest
Possibly reword to: I disliked my family member

As for the content of the essay, both circumstances add to the value of the actual short essay but I would advise you to somehow combine the content of the two paragraphs. I see both paragraphs led you to a greater appreciation for the science of psychology, but you could make the second paragraph sound better by saying something like " Like being with my autistic family member, I was perplexed by the fact that my friend demonstrated psychological oddities which I did not understand but wanted to learn more about" These types of sentences combine both paragraphs for a more 'smooth' essay as opposed to talking about your family member, and then jumping into a different topic about your friend.

Good luck!


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