Do you agree or disagree with this sentence?Getting advice from friends who are older than you is more valuable than friends with your same age.
First and foremost, It would be possible to take the views that acquire advice from the friends who at the same age is more valuable.The main reason is that the people have similar age they grow up at the same Era background;
In daily life so many problems are worth considering carefully. when people face a dilemma where do they get the best suggestion from? Contrary to the opinion of many people who deem that the best advice comes from friends of the same age, it is my heartfelt belief that getting advice from friends who are older,is wiser.
It would be possible at first to take the view that acquiring advice from friends who are at the same age is more valuable. The main argument is that people of similar age, grow up in the same era and have similar background, so they can communicate and understand each other easily; for example they may have watched the same cartoons, have the same icon, have numerous common topics, even the way they think about the current phenomena are the same. When people ask help for the friends at the same age, It seems to ask themselves, indeed, and the friend just like a mirror, reflect the answer That they are consider about in the deep heart.
Considerable though the advantages that getting counsel from the peer at the same age result in, are they cannot compete with the benefit that obtaining exhortation from the older friends brings about when mature perception and abundantce experience are taken into delibconsideration. He will find out how to refuse others unreasonable demands with leaving no traces, such as help friend cheated on a test, keep one lie to his parents And the across-the-board advice will expand one's horizons and let one consider the problem more comprehensive. For instance, a student could ask his professor, the older friend, which course could he learn more knowledge and obtain a good GPA, in the end of this term.
In addition, iqually important to the ripe inspection is the well-rounded veteran. We may mention a common example of choosing major in the university. this issue is much complicated one, it is determines what the student will learn next four years and what he will do during the rest of lifetime it can be the most significant decision in his life. The major is to college student what the foundation is to a skyscraper, water is to fish, and the heart is to a human. at the cutting age of life the college student should get exhortation from the older friends who have had go through this before, the same-aged friends are fac this dilemma too, the advantage of acquiring advice from older friends went without saying.
Even though, I, myself am taking a baby steps in writing essay, I'll try to give some suggestions. Hopefully it helps.
We should not write Capital letters in middle of the sentence. For example, in first paragraph
Getting should be getting.
Dear binu
Thank you very much! I will bear your suggestion in my mind!
Dear Rajiv:
Thank you for your advice!There are really helpful!
Contrary to the opinion of many people who believe that the best advice comes from friends of the same age, it is my heartfelt belief that getting advice from friends who are older than you is wiser.
Rajiv gave great corrections here.
Here is another idea for this part: He will find out how to refuse others' unreasonable demands without offending them, such as requests to help friends cheat on tests or lie to their parents.
I agree with you! I always seek advice from people who are much older than me.
Dear Kevin,
Thank you for your suggestion! Ha ha,I think you are older than me! So I make right decision!
New draft
What do you think about this;
As what has been come up with, When people face a dilemma, where might they get the best suggestions?
This issue is a complicated one, it determines what the student will learn over the next four years and what he will do during the rest of his lifetime, and it can be the most significant decision in his life.
At the cutting age of his life, the college student should get exhortation from older friends who have had to go through this before;...
It's looking much better!
:)
Dear Kevin
Thank you !I will reworked my essay!
Have a nice day!
Dear Rajiv
Thank you very much! you are so kind!
the suggestions are very helpful!
thanks again!Have a nice day!
I'd revise your second-to-last essay to focus more on the importance of experience. Here, for instance:
"By taking suggestion from older friends, the one has an excellent opportunity to learn about solv[ing] the problems in a sophisticated way. He will find out how to refuse others' unreasonable demands [from others] without offending them, such as, refusing to help a friend cheated on a test, [or] keep one from lying to his parents. "
There is no reason why an older person would necessarily be more likely to advise honesty than a younger person. In fact, the opposite might well be the case, as younger people are more likely to believe in a simple unquestioned morality. However, your point about experience is really good, and you do a great job of expanding on that in the last paragraph. So, perhaps you could refine this paragraph to make a similar point, only with different examples.
Dear Sean
Thank you for your advice,but I cannot understand them clearly
Please explain again thanks!
Okay, you say, "By taking suggestion from older friends, one has an excellent opportunity to learn about solving problems in a sophisticated way. He will find out how to refuse unreasonable demands from others without offending them such as refusing to help a friend cheat on a test, or keep one from lying to his parents." However, you offer no reason why older friends would be more likely to advise a person to avoid either cheating or lying. Older friends might even be more likely to give bad advice on such subjects, depending upon what age groups you have in mind. A ten-year-old is likely to advise against cheating, because that is what his parents have taught him. A fifteen-year-old, going through teenage rebellion, might easily advise in favor of cheating, for much the same reason, namely that his parents have taught him that it is wrong. So, this point is weak, because you provide no real reason to believe that your assertion is true. To improve, you would either have to provide such reasons, or come up with a more defensible point.
