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The Super Student, a person who had an influence on me - admission essay



eagle6002 2 / 2  
Nov 21, 2008   #1
Describe a character in fiction, a historical figure, or a creative work (as in art, music, science, etc.) that has had an influence on you, and explain that influence.

Michael Driscoll continues his days as a seemingly ordinary high school student at Archmere Academy. During the day, he studies. During the night, he runs. During the weekend he read the new comic books for the week and spends time with his friends. However, many do not know the true nature behind this mysterious being. To get through his busy schedule and challenging agenda, he takes on the personas of those he reads about on a weekly basis in comic books. Michael Driscoll becomes more than a son, a brother, a student, a teammate, and a friend. He becomes a superhero among students.

At school, Mr. Driscoll becomes the great mastermind behind the Dark Knight of Gotham City, Bruce Wayne. With this newfound analytic skill, engineering prowess, and mastery of the sciences, Michael easily adapts to the classroom environment. In AP Calculus BC and AP Physics, he uses his persona to attack the most challenging problems, just as Batman would pursue his most famed villain, the Joker. Continuing his journey through the school day, Mike tracks down themes and symbols in literature class and develops useful gadgets and contraptions in engineering class. He proceeds to use the strategies of Bruce Wayne to succeed throughout the day and enjoy the school environment. Michael Driscoll then leaves Archmere Academy successful in his quest to conquer new concepts and challenging tests. However, his day as a superhero is not yet over, as he continues down to the track for cross country practice.

At cross country practice, Michael Driscoll dons his cross country uniform to become the lightning-fast Flash. During track workouts, he uses his powers of speed and agility during each timed interval in the desire to achieve negative splits. Then, during hill workouts, Mr. Driscoll attacks the seemingly insurmountable adversaries with unseen effort and strength during the lengthy surge. These workouts cumulate to the final test of heart and might in a race. During these monumental events, Michael calls upon the full limits of his running abilities in order to protect the reputation of his team from the epic blow of a defeat. It is not until Mike ensures that dignity and pride of his teammates that he allows himself to return to his human life. Of course, the ultimate persona of Michael Driscoll does not truly come to form until he interacts with his classmates.

Concerning the various spectrums of social life, Mike Driscoll transforms himself into the undefeatable and limitless Superman. He uses this new persona not for the purpose of attacking those around him, but rather to break the boundaries of the stereotypical clichés. Michael Driscoll pushes past the almost impenetrable barrier of social groups in a desire to unite his classmates as one school. He shatters the representation of select people as losers, geeks, jocks, or brainiacs as he himself becomes a real-life representation of all of these concepts put together. He flies through each different social groups in order to acquaint himself with people of all different personalities and backgrounds and comes out triumphant against the villainy of stereotypes. With his task of uniting those around him complete, Mr. Driscoll heads home after a long and eventful day.

At the end of the day, Michael Driscoll puts away his facades and recuperates himself after a hectic and challenging day. His personas encourage him to live his life to the fullest, all the while lending him wisdom and knowledge. They are his inspiration and guide through life's challenges. Who knows where these influences will lead him, but for now, Michael Driscoll will continue to live day in and day out under the inspiration of these select heroes whose escapades are an integral part of his life.

OP eagle6002 2 / 2  
Nov 21, 2008   #2
Hey, I was wondering if you could look over my essay and give me a few suggestions.
Thanks!
EF_Team5 - / 1583  
Nov 21, 2008   #3
Good afternoon :)

A few suggestions:

"During the weekend he reads the new comic books for the week and spends time with his friends."

"In AP Calculus BC and AP Physics , he..." These aren't proper nouns, so they shouldn't be capitalized.

"..lightning-fast " Flash." During..."

In regards to your content, forgive me, but I'm not really familiar with comic books characters, so it is difficult for me to tell if Michael Driscoll is a character, or your persona :)

If it is your persona, this is a great piece; very creative. If he is something else, I apologize in advance :) !

Your examples are good; very detailed. Your organization is great and it is very easy to read. Great job!

Regards,
Gloria
Moderator, EssayForum.com
OP eagle6002 2 / 2  
Nov 21, 2008   #4
Michael Driscoll is my name. I thought I would put a little twist on the essay by writing it in the 3rd person.

Thanks a ton for helping me out!


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