UofRochester "Ever Better"-I locked myself in a locker

University of Rochester-Meliora: 'Ever better' - The University's motto, Meliora, directs our focus toward continual improvement through research, understanding, and collaborative efforts. Offer an example from your personal experience of an obstacle you faced or a problem you identified. Describe the actions you took and the result.

After vigorously pushing the door, I thought the locker would be my tomb. I locked myself in a locker because I was curious about if I could fit in. Sweating on my back, I forced myself to calm down and recall if people could open a locker when it was not locked. YES! Then how did the lock work? I lightened the darkness with my cell-phone's screen. Since my body couldn't bend over, I barely touched the lock and pulled it into different directions. Following by a clear sound, I finally saw the brightness again. However, I won't give up exploring my curiosity, yet I learned a better way of approaching. Instead of reckless trying, deep consideration and careful research should take the first step.

There is a 125 words limit...so it's really hard to squeeze all the details and my emotion changes into the paragraph...I've tried. Anyways, any comments and suggestions will be much appreciated. Thanks so much in advance!!

I Liked your syntax in this piece. (i.e: Locker=tomb)
rewording the last 2 sentences might be to your advantage. It was difficult for me to understand the last bit
I see where you're going, but it might be detrimental to blatantly answer the prompt like that in the end...
Other wise, good ideas, and i enjoyed reading this.

haha that was exactly how I felt then...

yeaa I found the end really weird and tried to rephrase it...but i've been staring at it for hours...and no good idea came out..i'll try to get back to it later i guess.

Thank you so much for pointing that out!!

After vigorously pushing on the door, I thought the locker would be my tomb.

I'd locked myself into a locker because I was curious about whether I could fit inside .

However, I won't give up exploring my curiosity, yet I learned a better way of approaching it .

Instead of reckless trying, deep consideration and careful research should be the first step.

I hope this helps!

:)