Academic Writing: the daily audiences percentage of UK radio and television X-XII 1992

Any comments and corrections are deeply appreciated, thank you in advance !

The graph below shows radio and television audiences of United Kingdom throughout the day in the year 1992. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information shown below.

television viewers and radio listeners in UK

The provided line graph depicts the daily audiences percentage of United Kingdom radio and television during October to December in 1992. As can be seen, both media has their peak point in the completely different time of the day. While radio has it during the morning, television has them when the night comes.

Both line graphs started almost at the same percetage value with only a slight difference in number. Comes the morning, a dramatical change was occured in the graph representing the radio listeners. A rise to 25% made the chart in stark contrast to those of television audiences, which remained steady as its preceeding trend. It was not until around 9 AM that the television audiences percentage started to rose.

From then on, the television viewer gradually inclined until 3 PM where it suddenly doubled, and reached a percentage of over 40% of viewers by 8PM. In contrast, the radio audiences percentage started to fall down by 9 AM and carried on until the end of the day.

(170 words)

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  LINE_GRAPH_TV_RADIO.png
  

Haiyin, you need to develop a more consistent presentation of your timeline in your English sentences. Try to familiarize yourself with the tense usage methods in order to help you understand and decide upon which proper tense should be used in your sentence development. You are confusing the reader because you are mixing present and past tenses in your sentences. Consistency in your timeline is necessary in a summary academic presentation. The information you presented discusses the more obvious graph representations and figures. So that shows that you consulted the graph while developing your essay. However, you failed to note that there are 2 points during the day when television and radio seem to share an equal audience number. Those are information that can only be gained from a thorough review of the more intricate details of the chart. Including such minute details in your academic summary will help help to increase your score.